9/7 Show Discussion Thread **Spoilers**

[Sunnyone]

She's filling in as a surrogate mother. There is 50,000 dollars in it for both mothers to perform the other womans role as mother so she's really not just a guest. She's being paid to fill in as the mother;in effect she's hired help, just as all the other mothers and fathers who trade places.

The list is not meant to degrade her ,but to let her know what it is she is to do while the real mother is away. The sole purpose of the show is for these women to experience how life is in another household. For better or worse that's what they signed up for and they are being rewarded handsomely for it.
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I see it differently. The mothers are not there to conform to their rules, they are to conform to her rules. The producers even have them say *Now we do it MY way*. Generally, it's the women who run the household, so they are the ones in charge of the 'new' family- not the other way around.

[Duxxy]

Wow. Holy judgmental batman!

Lets really break things down with Kathy and Arthur.
Firstly.. Drew is 17 so they have been together for at least 18 years.
Secondly ...We all grow and change while adding almost 2 decades to our lives, that might include glasses, hearing aids and putting on a few pounds.

Arthur and Kathy's relationship is a little 1950's but its no different than any relationship now-a-days. They each have a role in the household and seem to embrace it. They agreed between them that Arthur will go out to work and support the family and Kathy will stay home and raise the family and keep things rolling merrily along. Not many of us can afford that luxury. Good for them!
Running a household and raising 3 kids is a full time job, Kathy, like most women tolerates her husband's misguided notion that he is the king of the castle. Kathy is opinionated and hardly a push over. She runs her household in a very unobstructive manner. Her younger 2 children seem to be a delight, it's only the hormone affected Drew that seems to be the trouble maker - but he's part of Planet Teenager after all .. we can only hope that he outgrows the whining and wheedling.
I think the touching scene just before Kathy departs shows just how close this couple is. This show has the most dependent men we've seen yet and they are clearly in love with their wives. This is also the first show in the series that's shown heart-felt goodbyes instead of perfunctory kisses before their loved ones are ushered into a taxi for parts unknown.
She's lucky he hasn't traded her in for a trophy wife? :phhht I think not, he'd be lost without her. True love knows no bounds.. changes in appearance are hardly divorce worthy.. to normal people.
I think each of these couples has a thriving relationship with strong foundations - what more can you ask for?

[realfun]

She's a housewife. That is her job ,to take care of the household.
If she does not like the job she can go out and get a regular 9 to 5. I do not feel sorry for her plight. In fact there is no plight because she is ultimately responsible for how she is treated.

The man works and runs a business and he needs things done at home. I see no problem with him issuing out a list. I never saw an instance in which he was disrespectful to his wife. Whatever he may have said when he was alone to a camera I see as nothing more than a performance as most of those scenarios are.
All in all it's his house ,his family,his rules.

This post seems to assume that because Kathy's a housewife, Arthur's her boss. Marriage is a partnership -- not an employer/employee relationship. Arthur's no more Kathy's boss than Kathy is Arthur's. And no, it's not "his house, his family, his rules." It's THEIR house, THEIR family and it should be THEIR rules.

[realfun]

Arthur and Kathy's relationship is a little 1950's but its no different than any relationship now-a-days.

Thankfully, in my experience, Arthur and Kathy's relationship is nothing at all like a contemporary marriage. Vive la difference!!

[did_it_again]

I think Arthur and Kathy love one another which is why I think they are still together. That's why I say he may not be as shallow when it comes to "that", meaning physical looks etc.
Their relationships seems to work so that's cool .....the Donahoe realtionship on the other hand seems to......survive. What I find odd is the children. The Donahoe children seem better behaved then the Messina children ,although if Drew were taken out the picture the Messinas kids would problably get along better.

[realfun]

Actually, I thought that of the two couples, the Donahos were more overtly affectionate with each other. They actually seem to like each other's company (though what Jen sees in Rodney is beyond me). Either way, there is a lot more anger in the Messina family, and while Drew may be the most flamboyant about showing it, there are visible flashes of it in all members of the family except Kathy. Children model the behavior of their parents and that's what's going on in these families.

[did_it_again]

Good point.Yeah, Arthur looked really bent a couple of times. Almost to the point of caving Drews face in.

[Mikabelle]

I agree with some of the latter posts that Kathy doesn't deserve pity for how her life has turned out, on the contrary, she seems very content. She seems to take pride in how nicely kept her house is, and her active, healthy kids. I hardly think Arthur makes Kathy a list every morning.... she runs the house her way. But I do agree that she needs to hand out more responsibilities to her kids.
I think the producers have set this show up where the first day or two the new moms replace the old moms as the house is now, and then are told to run the house how they would at home. Both so the new mom can see how other moms have it, and then (after being told 'Now do it your way') so the families can see how other moms have it. You know?
So when Arthur gave Jen the list, he was expecting her to jump into Kathy's shoes...not ordering a houseguest around.
I think that Drew is totally taking advantage of the fact that the cameras are around and is behaving more outrageous than he normally would. He understands that he won't get the immediate tongue lashing that he deserves. But man oh man... if he were my son..... there would be some serious punishment going on.
I will be very interested to see how the moms allocate the money tonite.

[azsk8fan]

She's a housewife. That is her job ,to take care of the household.
If she does not like the job she can go out and get a regular 9 to 5. I do not feel sorry for her plight. In fact there is no plight because she is ultimately responsible for how she is treated.

The man works and runs a business and he needs things done at home. I see no problem with him issuing out a list. I never saw an instance in which he was disrespectful to his wife. Whatever he may have said when he was alone to a camera I see as nothing more than a performance as most of those scenarios are.
All in all it's his house ,his family,his rules.

Let her take him to court and see whose house it really is......a mom with 2 minor children.....ha - I doubt good ole Arthur would own a bucket to piss in or a window to throw it out of ......... That house, income, everything belongs to both of them EQUALLY........that's how marriage works.....until a divorce and then the mom w/minor children will clean him out - and in this case it would be deservedly so. I don't have a problem with her being a housewife if that's her choice - the only 'problem' is Arthur and his way of demeaning someone by making LISTS????????? As a responsible homemaker and adult I'm sure she knows what needs to be done - the first thing being that she needs to teach her kids to take responsibility for themselves - make their own beds, pick up after themselves..... the concept should not be too difficult to grasp.....kids should be taught at age appropriate times to take on some responsibility.....she's not doing them a favor at all by being their personal slave

[azsk8fan]

Rich dad is an a$$
Poor dad is just a loser
Rich mom seemed nice until the end and then her air of superiority oozed out
Poor mom would be better if she made poor dad take on some responsibility the same way she's teaching her kids.....can't figure out why she does so good with the kids but fails to see what a loser her husband is

Rich families friends - all I can say is I hope they watch the show and see how pathetic they are....... they seem to be living in some 'fantasy' world like they're right up there with the celebrity lifestyles.....not hardly......what a pathetic bunch of snobs........