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Thread: Episode 1 RECAP - "Days of Swine and Bowheads".

  1. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by fluffster

    Oh my ,it's an adjective now ?

    Great recap Fluff!

  2. #12
    Hypermediocrity Amanda's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Quote Originally Posted by fluff
    The natives rush them as fast as you can possibly rush anyone or anything when you’re in a hand carved watercraft.

    She spends her spare time building indigenous lodges and turned to lesbianism after Tony Danza spurned her continued advances.

    A part-time mushroom hunter, she is yet to be discouraged by the fact her prey rarely puts up much of a fight.

    The same little washbowl that, any time you dine in a restaurant that offers them, some loud mouth at another table will claim to know someone who once tried to drink, then will laugh heartily while his party all cringe because he told that same story last time they ate there and they think the waiter remembers them because they’re “the group with the loud guy”

    I can see Eliza and me coming to metaphorical blows if she keeps up the perpetually perky act every time there is a whiff of testosterone in the air.

    Chris falls off and onto the net in a move that I am calling deliberate.
    The guy simply rolled off the side. No side to side trembling, no last ditch bid to correct himself before falling defeated into the net of doom.
    He just gently plopped off with so much aplomb I nearly scored him on the move.
    I honestly could have quoted so much more. Excellent, brilliant job.

    P.S. I LOVE the title, too!

  3. #13
    hellooooooo sher's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    dallas, fer sure
    thanks so much for the hysterical recap, fluffles! awesome as always.

  4. #14
    I'm not going to quote, because I would just be double-quoting.
    It's sufficient to say, "Fluff, you are the queen of the Survivor recaps!"
    You never cease to amaze me with your snazzy and witty recaps.

  5. #15
    where's my rose garden? Covaleskie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Quote Originally Posted by fluff
    John P, who Jiff has instantly begun to refer to as “JP’, a certain pride in his voice each time he mentions those two special initials,

    How could I have missed the JP connection! Great stuff, as always!
    There's always one in every bunch.

  6. #16
    I didn't want to post in here just to repeat what every other poster said, but I can't resist.

    Superb recap and I was laughing too much for my own good. You even made the name Morasca tolerable!

  7. #17
    Oh Look, A Farce! MysticalChicken's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2004
    On earth.
    Loved the recap!

    Having never read/posted on the Survivor board before, I have to ask: why is Jeff's name "misspelled" Jiff?


  8. #18
    Premium Member dagwood's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    salt lake city ut
    Quote Originally Posted by fluff
    Just as the Survivor’s look to be on the brink of expelling any stored bodily fluids, Jiff appears to save them and an audible sigh of relief washes across the entire group.

    Scout Cloud Lee
    She spends her spare time building indigenous lodges and turned to lesbianism after Tony Danza spurned her continued advances.

    Brook Geraghty

    He suffered the memory loss that lead to him listing Britney Spears as his favourite actress following a crack to the back of the head from a Newton’s cradle his exasperated manager had made airborne.

    Rory Freeman

    Surprisingly Rory did not draw the short straw name–wise among his siblings with this out of place Irish moniker, that honour goes to sister, Dahomey.

    Ami Cusack.

    Ami seems bereft of an upper lip. My overactive imagination leads me to conclude she lost in a freak mountaineering accident.

    Eliza- “They slapped us on the butt with their spears.
    Sorority gal Eliza’s indignity probably stems from the fact there was no dinner and movie before the guys moved straight to the feeling-up portion of the evening.

    I assume this is what happened because, as I found out, if you turn your head 90 degrees to the television, squint with your closest eye and mute the sound, it is almost entirely possible to get through any televisual experience in a state of near oblivion.
    You may well wish to try this next time Growing Up Gotti airs.

    I have taken an instant dislike to Lisa and while this next criticism says nothing of her character or personality, if she is going to insist on sporting such a weighty rack she really needs to get a bikini top with separate cups, or at the very least a higher lycra/cotton ratio to prevent her chest morphing into one giant superboob.

    Brook decides to chip in with a comment that leads me to believe the chief killed the wrong pig during the ceremony, by pointing out some of the women had “nice tails”.

    Fluff, I am so sorry that All Stars soured you for Survivor. Your re-caps are great! There has to be a way to wipe S8 out of your memory for good.
    He who laughs last thinks slowest

    #oldmanbeatdown - Donny BB16

  9. #19
    Evil Slash Crazy Miss Filangi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Looking for a place to happen
    The ceremony, which the locals take it very seriously, will be at once beautiful, repulsive and frightening. Although he doesn’t verbalize the warning his partially knitted eyebrows finish his sentence with “so don’t laugh”.

    Lisa Keiffer
    Sorority, cheerleader, pharmaceutical scales, annoying.

    Once on land, the tribesmen again swarm the Survivor’s, jabbing spears at them and shouting out a menacing chant which I shall translate to as warning to play smart and avoid another Romber style outcome.

    the women called Yassur, which sounds somewhat like “Yes sir”, in the spirit of the second-class citizen theme of the evening.

    Lea confesses – “The young guys said Sarge, we need to get rid of the weakest link”.
    They did say that, but they didn’t call him Sarge. I believe, in Lea, we have a man determined to invent his own nickname.

    I’ll just “yada” you through the first section of the TC.
    Grab a torch, get fire, yada yada.

    Fluff, you're the best. Absolutely brilliant.
    If you go through a lot of hammers each month, I don't think it necessarily means you're a hard worker.
    It may just mean that you have a lot to learn about proper hammer maintenance.

  10. #20
    Leo is offline
    Premium Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Ah, if only the show was this good. Why don't I just skip the show and read these instead?

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