Last time on Survivor, Margaret called Judd a traitor following his immediate defection from the tribe formerly known as “Old Nakum”. Jamie lost the reward challenge and he and Bobby Jon called each other southern-boy names. Yaxha got a croc- proof pool, Blake got on everyone’s nerves and was voted out, and in a desperate attempt to stop her whining, Stephenie’s tribe finally won an immunity challenge.
Yaxha Day 15 – It’s Ever’ Redneck For Himself
Brandon is stunned over Blake’s departure. He thought the four Yaxha guys – he, Bobby Jon, Blake and Brian – had a strong alliance. How the heck did Blake get voted out? He confers with Bobby Jon at the dock. Bobby Jon says he has some regrets, and mouths several soft-spoken platitudes about playing the game. He explains that while he and Brandon liked Blake, he rubbed others the wrong way. This gives Brandon a whole new perspective on the game - like thinking for himself, instead of being a good ole boy and hoping for the best.
Nakum Day 15- Bite Me
Everybody’s scratching – monkeys, humans, Judd. Mosquitoes are swarming the tribe and their constant buzzing is driving the Jamie crazy. “Just bite me and go” he mutters. Stephanie complains the insects are biting her through her shirt, while Cindy covers every inch of her body except her hands and eyes in attempt to stop the little bloodsuckers.
Over in the corner, Rafe and Judd have Margaret on their mind. Rafe says he tries to be positive, but her negative energy is bringing everyone down. Judd calls her miserable because she got stuck with him instead of her friends from the old tribe. The old tribe ain’t comin’ back. Margaret knows she’s in trouble. She says she used to be higher on the food chain, and she knows Judd
is a monkey’s asswants her out.
A Rolling Stone Gathers No Rednecks
When the tribes come together, Jeff explains today’s challenge: A giant ball sits in the middle of the clearing, made of what looks like leather skins laced together. Two tribal members from each tribe will try to push the ball over their team’s goal line, while the other team tries to push it past their own. The first team to score three goals will win.
Rubbing his hands together figuratively, Jeff informs them that there is no immunity challenge today: both tribes will be voting out a member tonight. Instead, they’ll play for an old fashioned cookout, complete with hot dogs, hamburgers, root beer and longnecks. Each member of the winning tribe will also get to compete for individual immunity, meaning that the person who wins will be safe at the tribal council tonight. To really stir things up, they’ll also be able to confer immunity to one member of the opposing tribe at their tribal council tonight. Forget immunity, 14 pairs of eyes sparkle at the sight of an iced tub of beer.
First up are Stephenie and Cindy playing for Nakum, against Amy and Danni for Yaxha. Cindy doesn’t have the weight to force the ball back, and she and Stephenie are quickly overpowered. Yaxha takes the first point.
Next, the guys take a turn. Judd and Jamie compete for Nakum against Brandon and Bobby Jon from Yaxha. Both teams run toward the ball, crashing into it at top speed. Jamie and Judd eventually manage to push the ball over their goal line, scoring a point for Nakum. Jamie gives a victory yell and Bobby Jon rushes him, doing a chest-bumping maneuver designed to intimidate. The men scream inarticulately at each other. Bobby Jon gets in the last word: “That’s not nice.” Ah. You forgot your manners, Jamie, and nice southern boys always remember their manners. You’re setting a poor example for the howler monkeys. Gary and Lydia watch open-mouthed, and the teams fall silent. The cameras continue to roll, getting extra film for the TV movie of the week, When Rednecks Ruled the Earth. Bonus.
Ignoring the melee, Jeff announces the next teams – Judd and Stephenie versus Gary and Amy. Amy falls to the ground screaming after re-injuring her ankle. Judd and Steph can’t roll the ball over her wedged body despite a valiant effort, and she manages to get up. In obvious pain, she rejoins Gary but they give up quickly and Nakum wins point two.
Amy has no chance to recuperate; she and Danni must compete against Margaret and Cindy. Even injured, Amy is a strong woman, and she and Danni tie up the score two and two.
Judd and Jamie return to compete against Bobby Jon and Brian. Judd and Jamie win the final point for Nakum. Jamie wisely keeps his cheers to himself this time, and he and Judd are rewarded by hugs from the
the girls and Rafethe girls. Bobby Jon looks on, perhaps daring Jamie to make an experimental peep, and Yaxha shuffles off to contemplate tonight’s tribal council.
Scrabble for Survivors
The Nakum members will have to wait for their feast. Having won the tribal challenge, each member will compete for individual immunity by collecting three bags, untying them and taking them back to their table. When all three are collected they will remove tiles from the bags and form a 2-word phrase. Stephenie takes the lead but is unable to figure out the phrase. Judd struggles with his bags, unable to open them to remove the tiles. Frustrated, he looks at Rafe’s tiles and figures out the phrase. He says ancient ruin sotto voce, repeating it three times before Rafe takes the hint. Jeez, Rafe, didn’t you ever cheat in school? Rafe finally gets a clue and calls out the phrase, shaking Judd’s hand when he wins. Rafe gets a purty bead necklace to wear and the team heads out for the feast.
Back at camp, Jamie says Bobby Jon hit a new nut level. “He got in my face and started screaming so I screamed back.” Stephanie, expert on Bobby Jon, says “He always does that.” Consensus is, Bobby Jon’s just crazy. Jamie takes it in stride – southern people are just crazy and they know it. He shrugs it off and opens beer for the tribe. Hmm, crazy southern man + beer. Maybe that’ll calm things down.
Everyone enjoys the picnic. Margaret and Cindy clutch burgers so thick they can hardly get their mouth around them, while Stephenie licks stray juice off her hands. Judd belches, bemoaning the tribal council later in the evening. He and Jamie sit on a rock talking. “So we lose Margaret tonight.” Judd says matter-of-factly. He grabs Jamie by the head and plants a kiss on his head. ‘I’m going to tribal council tonight without a damn worry on the world.” He grins as he walks around the camp. Stephenie offers to trade Judd a beer for his hotdog, but there’s a problem at the beer trough. It seems there’s a beer missing. Rafe thinks someone drank an extra one by accident but Margaret is sure Judd is the culprit. She calls Judd “his own worst enemy.” Uh, besides you, Margaret? Cindy says Judd speaks before he thinks, a statement born out when Judd tells everyone to kiss his ass. He sits alone on a rock and sulks at the loss of his beer. Hey Judd, there’s room at the redneck table with Jamie and Bobby Jon.
Jamie and Bobby Jon’s near fight is the talk at the Yaxha camp. Brandon laughs about it. Bobby Jon says he had to put Jamie in his place. “If you wanna buck up, fine, but theah’s anotha be-ah out in th’ woods, too.” He nods at Brandon. Brandon files this away for future reference in case Jamie wants to be-ah up against him, too.
Amy feels she let her tribe down. Although her ankle is swollen she continues to stand on it, shrugging off Brian’s suggestion that she put it up. Brian wants to make sure his original teammates – Gary and Amy- are safe. He talks to Gary, suggesting they stick together and vote out Bobby Jon. Gary is non-committal. Secretly he nixes the idea of voting against Bobby Jon since he’s one of the strongest players. Brandon has his own idea. He thinks Brian and Amy are in jeopardy as the two weakest members on the team. Brian says anyone could go home, including him. Foreshadowing, anyone?
Nakum Tribal Council: Where Is The Love?
Nakum has the honor of being first tribe to the council tonight. The members file in and Jeff says they’ll start with the fun stuff, which turns out to be what Stephenie thought of the feast. She volunteers that she traded her second beer to Judd for his hotdog. Judd would rather have a beer any day, especially in 122-degree heat. Anti-fun league member Margaret rolls her eyes.
Jeff asks Jamie what happened between him and Bobby Jon. Jamie gives a garbled southern boys will be boys answer to Jeff and hundreds of southern men watching want to buck him like a be-ah in the woods for maligning their heritage.
Jeff asks Margaret if she thinks the tribal members are good sports. She names Judd and Jamie as being unable to control their emotions. Judd looks disbelieving. He doesn’t believe it’s bad sportsmanship to celebrate a victory. Stephenie nods her head, agreeing, but Rafe looks worried at the conflict. Judd gets wound up talking about winning, and Jamie begins massaging his shoulder in an attempt to calm him down. Judd blathers on, telling Margaret she’s probably never played a sport in her life and she should just shut up. Margaret says Judd trash talks everyone and plows over others when they try to talk. Judd interrupts, telling Jeff he loves everyone on the team except for Margaret. Cindy says that the negativity between Judd and Margaret affects everyone in the tribe. Margaret says that Judd is unable to listen. Judd interrupts again, asking Cindy if he listens to everybody. She says yes, and he interrupts her before she can finish her sentence. Turning to Rafe, he asks the same question. Mild mannered Rafe attempts to answer, and Judd barks “do I listen to you?” to Lydia, Stephenie and Jamie, who all say yes. Jeff wonders aloud if Judd intimidates Rafe. Rafe says no, Judd has always been good to him. Stephenie thinks he’s just high strung. Judd says that Margaret doesn’t like him because he didn’t stick with the old tribe. Margaret agrees, telling him he flipped within two hours. Stephenie defends Judd: to stick with the old tribe would’ve been retarded. Nice choice of words, Steph, but Margaret is finally realizing which way the wind blows.
Not Even Close, Bud
It’s time to take it to the voting booth. Judd and Margaret vote for each other, but the other votes are not shown. Jeff tallies the votes, and Margaret is out. She walks away without a word to the tribe, but in a taped moment she prophesies continued trouble with Judd. A tape of the tribe members shows the vote was unanimous except for Margaret’s vote for Judd. It’s a good thing, as in her family moment her son says they’re running out of food. Go home and feed your family Margaret. They won’t dare interrupt you.
Yaxha Tribal Council: Flying Testosterone And More Bobby-isms
Now it’s Yaxha’s turn, and Rafe sits in with the council. Jeff immediately asks Bobby Jon for his version of the scrap between him and Jamie. Bobby Jon explains that when two “male people” get together there’s a lot of testosterone flying around. Gary smiles. He thinks the Nakum tribe members are good sports with the exception of Jamie, who sometimes talks trash.
In response to a question from Jeff, Brian says he can handle both physical and mental challenges. Bobby Jon calls Brian “a kamikaze goin’ to bust a wedge”. Brian knows the game and would be a great neighbor. Bobby throws in the greatest accolade of all “He’s just a good ole boy.” Run, Brian, run. You don’t understand southern culture. Bobby’s fixin’ to buck you like a be-ah in the woods! Danni calls Brian strong, smart – a classy guy.
Amy says she tweaked her ankle a bit, but it’s good. Brandon was impressed with her cussin’ and ever’thing. Bobby Jon says there are no weak links. Everyone has given it their all. “You look up and someone’s throwin’ a corncake in your mouth.” ??? English, Dude. Do you speak it? Who’s lobbing cornbread at you?
Jeff is unable to think of a fitting reply so he informs the tribe that, in addition to Rafe sitting in, he has earned the right to give one tribal member immunity. Rafe writes down the name of a Yaxha member , seals it in an envelope and returns to camp. His choice for immunity will remain a secret until the votes are tabulated. Brian votes for Bobby Jon, and Bobby Jon returns the favor by voting for Brian. Jeff tallies the votes and, as with Margaret, the entire tribe has voted for Brian. Opening Rafe’s envelope, Jeff reveals that Rafe gave immunity to Gary. Brian leaves, smiling and wishing the others good luck. Blue state Brian is on his way home.
Next week: Amy confronts Gary about his alter ego as Mr. Ex-NFL Football Playa, and Yaxha guide their hooptie-canoe to the Nakum camp for a surprise visit.
Need a translation of tonight’s dialogue? I speak fluent redneck and a regional southern dialect called Texan. Email me at Dinahann@fansofrealitytv.com