I apologize for my (unofficial) screen caps being so very very late last week. I was out of town for a few days then I got home and was preparing them when the entire FoRT web site disappeared. I posted them on the temporary site a couple of days ago and was finally able to post them on the real site early (early for the West coast) this morning.
Ulong won the reward challenge last week and "won" tubes of Pringles -- even when Ulong wins they lose. To no-one's amazement Ulong then lost the Immunity Challenge when Jame's magic knot turned out not to be all that magical after all. Even down to four members Ulong couldn't get it together and vote James out cleanly, they had to go to a tie breaker before they could kick his sorry sarong-wearing ass off the show.
So it's Koror with eight members (nine counting Binky) verses Ulong with three and no merge in sight. The big question for tonight's show isn't which Ulongian is getting voted out. It's can two of them get together and vote for the same person or is the first round of voting going to end in a three-way tie?
Much to their embarrassment, after many days of searching Ulong finally finds their cave thirty feet from their original camp site.
"Sometimes the best finish two in the bush, you know. A rolling stone laughs the best, a stitch in time those who also stand and wait".
"If Steph doesn't stop her insane rambling I'm gonna [WHAM!] *sigh*, I feel much better now".
"You ever spend this much time with the same group of people?"
"No, not friends, not family. Not even my nannie. What about you?"
"Only once, it ended good though".
"I made parole".
"Bring on the merge, there's no way we're ever winning an immunity challenge. Not when they can send Tom, Ian and Gregg against us".
"Bobby Jon and I have an alliance. I feel that I can trust him a lot more than he can trust me".
"Hey everyone I wanted to introduce you to my new friend, Clammy. I'm going to train him to make pearls".
"Or we could just eat him".
"Ian finds this giant clam, it's huge. It's as big as a semi-trailer. We're going to us it as a roof".
"Mmmm, Clammy makes one tasty treat".
"*sniffle* I don't know how you can be so barbaric! *sniff, sniff* It does smell good".
"Here try some".
"*munch* *munch* That is good, give me some more".
"When we saw the shark we both grabbed our point-head sticks ready to poke ineffectually at it".
"I whacked it with the machete".
"You didn't use a point-head stick?"
"I couldn't find one in time, so I just whacked it with the sharpened steel blade of the machete".
"I can't believe that worked!"
"It's still alive! Ian, get over here and help me poke at it with a point-head stick".
"You think that's impressive, wait until you see what I can catch using this as bait!"
"The cat's out of the bag that I'm a strong player".
I don't know how to break this to you Tom, but that cat got out of the bag on day three.
"As soon as Tom caught the shark, Gregg looked at me like he couldn't believe Tom and I have the same number of chromosomes".
"You can only taunt me so long before I strike back at you".
"I'd love you to 'taunt' me Tom. !!! Was that out loud?"
"We need to build a signal".
"I can tear down the outhouse really easy, it's already fallen down twice on its own".
"We've been tearing down our old shelter to burn because we've been living in the cave and haven't been using it anyway".
"I'll do it, who else? Caryn?"
"Sure, I'll do it."
"We want to give Ulong a fighting chance, so how about Katie as the third person".
"We can only have three people build the shelter, so we're sending Caryn, Katie and Gregg which I think is a good idea because it means I get to spend the day relaxing".
"I hate having my fate in other people's hands".
Tom is so not going to enjoy tribal council.
"We're making two big fire bundles right here, we're using really dry stuff so there's no smoke".
***** Screen Cap Interruptus *****
I just have to drop out of screen-cap mode for a second and deliver a small piece of advice. If you're ever in a situation where you are trying to signal a plane to rescue you, here is how you do it:
You build a big hot fire and keep it going. You keep a pile of green foliage right beside the fire, as soon as you hear/see an aircraft you start throwing the green foliage into the fire. This creates huge clouds of billowy white smoke that is visible for miles.
"OK Bob, here the situation. I'm so scared I just crapped my drawers".
See what I mean? You can't even tell their stuff is on fire.
"OK Bob, give me your assessment of Koror's SOS".
"It's big, it's set away from the jungle and it's creative but I think that may be a violation of Trademark law. In fact, yep, there are the Trademark Police coming to arrest them right now. That is a great SOS".
OK, tell me no one is gullible enough to think they actually dropped the box from the plane ON the camera guy.
"Red wine! What are they thinking, everyone knows you serve white wine with shark!"
"We also got a bunch of fishing equipment, so we're going to take our fishing to the next level".
"The next level"? You just finished catching a three foot long shark, what are you going to go after? Bluefin Tuna?
"Poor Ulong, there's three of them now. I don't know how they can maintain camp, compete in challenges and stay mentally strong. I think they must be absolutely beat up over this".
Well done Gregg, that pretty much sums up life in Camp-Ulong.
Oh, now that's gonna smell...
"Gregg and Jen joke about it, they call themselves the Make-out Bandits. I don't know, I guess they're dating. I don't really care as long as I don't have to watch".
"I'm so jealous of Gregg. I've never really had a girlfriend. I want a girlfriend too. A real girlfriend, one without flippers".
"It's tough for me. It's tough to pretend to be The Boyfriend when really, I don't care about her".
"There are times when Gregg is really off to me, it's almost like he came here to win a million dollars and not to fall in love".
"Oh man, this is gonna be good. I bet Koror's not eating this well".
"How about you Koror, do you want to rub your fishing successes in Ulong's face?"
"Koror you might as well just hang onto Binky. Wait a sec., *listens to hidden ear piece* They say we have to go through the motions, don't worry you'll get him back in a few minutes".
"This one's gotta go over and that ones gotta go down?"
"I don't understand what you mean, that one has to... wait. This is confusing. Move that one back, and let's start again".
"Hey Jeff, how did you get out there without getting wet?"
"We can't believe we're going back to tribal council".
I would have though five straight loses would have made believers out of anybody.
"I want to apologize for my voice, I've been laughing at you so hard I thrashed my throat".
"Bobby Jon, who decided to make you the caller?"
"We all did, but I think it was a mistake because I'm such a moron. I wasn't even smart enough to know that I didn't know what I was doing".
"How disheartening is it, it's not like you're always facing their best players. Tom and Ian both sat out both challenges, how does it feel to lose against their weakest players?"
"What can I say, I didn't expect to be voted off tonight, I expected to be voted off two weeks ago".