On last week's (mostly) immunity-free episode Willard was unanimously voted out of Koror before he got to "enjoy" the stew and root beer other members of his tribe won while he sat in a canoe. Ibrehem was saved from certain elimination by those meddling Koror kids. Which left the hungry, confused and hopelessly unorganized Ulong Tribe to play an updated version of Pin the tail on the donkey and vote out Angie.
Without the calming influence of Angie's Chia-Pits(tm) waving serenely in the gentle island breeze life for Ulong may get even more stressful and uneasy on this week's episode...
Much to the producer's horror the legendary Giant Crabs of Palau are more than just legend.
"A lot of times I'm able to get off on my own away from myself".
"Ulp, eating those old C-Rations we found may not have been the best idea..."
"Hey! Stop that crazy bird, it's got our lunch!!!"
"While everyone else was working, Katie made necklaces. Thank God there is someone on this tribe more effeminate than me".
"I feel great, I thought it was going to be harder than this. But as long as my tribe keeps winning immunity I can't be voted out and so I don't have to do any work".
Tree-mail with a single Pringles chip, won't that prove that all of their "You can't eat just one" advertising was a huge lie?
See the dew on the sunflower
And a rose that is fading
Roses whither away
"Tom had no trouble the first time, let's see if I can jinx him this time".
Steph is four for four, any guys dating her in the future should probably keep that in the back of their minds...
"It's very simple Karen, make this and you're is still in it. Miss and everyone will blame you. Oops, wait a minute you're not on Ulong. Forget I said anything".
"Survivor trivia, ready? What is the first tribe to lose every immunity challenge and get completely wiped out before the merge?"
"How many Mai Tais does it take to make Pringles taste good?"
"That's a trick question, there aren't enough Mai Tais in the world to make Pringles taste good".
"Ooo look. Dinner!"
"Ooo! Hey, who's hand is that?"
"Janu is losing it, I thought I was the Drama Queen but I guess not. I guess I'm just the Drama Princess".
"So, do you think we should get the rope wet so that it stretches and then is really really hard to undo once it's dried?"
"We suck at this team-work thang, and I knows me this magic knot. So let me tie it and I'll be solely responsible for our win".
"First things, first. Janu, hand over Willard... I mean Binky!"
He can't tie his skirt closed. This is the guy they had tie the box up with his magic knot? [sniff, sniff] is that the acrid stench of foreshadowing?
"James realizes that with Angie gone Screen-Fuzz Guy's job is in jeopardy and decides to let the boys hang free".
"Are tigers particularly dexterous when it comes to untying knots?"
"Oh! I just figure out what Tom was talking about, grrrr!"
"Ibrehem says he's still here 'cause of his god, well my god is stronger than his god so he's outa here".
Yah gotta admire the reckless abandon with which he tempts fate!
"Ooo, there's one. Nope, too big".
"If she's playing me, we'll find out but I don't think she is".
Why are we guys so damn gullible all the time?
Mmmm, pan-fried coconut. Yummy!
"I don't know what to do. I can double-cross James and vote for him, or I can go back on my word to Bobby Jon and vote for Ibrehem. Or, I can first break my pact with Bobby Jon and force a tie between Ib and James then double-cross James".
"Welcome back. Take your seats. They're probably still warm from last time".
"James, you lost again, why do you guys suck so much?"
"It's not our fault, Koror has this whole 'Teamwork' thang going for 'em that's tough to beat".
"Bobby Jon, do you trust the people in your tribe?"
"Of course, if you don't trust the other poeple in your tribe you won't be able to pull together as a team when it really counts... Hmmm, you just gave me something to think about".
"Steph, can the guys trust you?"
"When I give someone my word I hope they think that they can trust me".
"That doesn't really answer the question".
"I plead the fifth".
"Sorry, it's not you it's me".
"Tell it to the hand".
"Six straight losses in a row. No tribe has ever sucked this much. The producers are in a tizzy because they never imagined that a tribe could suck this much and they have to rework the rest of the show. Get out of my sight. You make me sick".