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Thread: Survivor: Gabon, 11/13 recap: Merged and Mean

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    Wonky snarkmistress Lucy's Avatar
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    Survivor: Gabon, 11/13 recap: Merged and Mean

    Last week, producers fooled the survivors with a fake merge feast, then mixed them up again. This, plus Susie’s unreliability, allowed Crystal and Kenny to blindside Marcus. What twist will come this week?


    I’m Just Shocked There’s No Market for Science Humor

    At Kota that night, Crystal hugs Susie. Susie praises Kenny for “coming out of your shell.” He says it was a huge night for him, now he has to stand up for himself, and he’s blindsided people at the last two councils.

    Kenny says Bob should be worried, because he’s the next to go. In fact Bob IS worried, and says he knows he’s next to go unless there’s a merge. He says he’s history even though he teaches science. Wha… what? He says that’s a joke. If that’s what constitutes a joke amongst scientists, I’m glad I majored in English.

    Over at Fang the next day, they’re having trouble making fire. Matty says he’s just hoping for a merge any day. Tree mail suggests to them their next challenge will involve golf, with a reward of a “once in a lifetime cultural trip.” But it also has a slingshot. So Fang practices with it.


    How Dare They Not Do Everything Randy’s Way?

    Corrine, by the way, tells us as long as she, Charlie and Marcus are intact, she doesn’t care who goes home. Well, surprise to her, then, when she gets to the challenge and realizes Marcus got voted out. Corrine puts her hands to her face, while Matty winks at Kenny.

    Corrine tells Jeff she’s pissed, because Marcus didn’t deserve to leave. “Who does?” asks Kenny. Susie says they all deserve to be there. Charlie says it sucks.

    “It’s just that he deserved to be here longer,” Corrine says. Way to sound like an entitled biatch.

    The challenge setup is three golf holes, spread over acres of land. Jeff explains they’ll use a slingshot to shoot the ball toward the hole, until it finally lands in the hole. The tribe with the best score wins, and will be taken to a Gabonese village, for a meal, a dance ceremony and an overnight.

    This looks difficult to me, as they’re shooting 150 yards or so, and the slingshot involves two people holding the sides while one pulls it back and falls over each time with the effort. Kota wins the first point, Fang the second, so it’s all coming down to the third one.

    Kenny misses two shots, putting the Fang team in the position where if they make it, they win. Randy decides to direct Charlie and Matty how to do it, and Matty doesn’t like it. “I want to win this happy and calm,” Charlie says, as Randy yells. At any rate, what Matty does works, and Fang wins reward. They start cheering, except a very pissed-off Randy. “There’s no need to scream, man,” he grumps. Sugar tells him to chill out.

    Corrine says they’re sending Bob to Exile, and wishes him luck finding the idol.

    Sugar says only Matty, Kenny and Crystal know she already has the idol. Matty says it was the most anxiety ridden challenge. And Randy says what Matty pulled “was ugly. He would not even listen.” I think what he means is “Matty would not take direct, shouted orders.” Amazing how Matty decided he had a brain of his own.


    Gabonese Women and Children Are Clearly Bad Judges of Character

    The winners head off through the woods, where they find a village of Gabonese folks wearing red dresses decorated in shells and waving leaves at them. Matty says he’s the only Fang member who’s been trapped at Fang the whole time, so to finally get a reward, “the man upstairs is looking out.”

    They sit down and are doused in water and whapped with leaves, and then dressed in colorful red print fabric. Some cute little girl for some reason latches onto Corrine, obviously not realizing that she has the hand of the devil. “I’d be the last person anyone would think would chum up to a two year old,” says Corrine, truthfully.

    They eat and talk about Marcus’ departure. Charlie says the three power players have been booted, and he feels low. He says he and Marcus weren’t just allies, they were “like, really good friends.” And he doesn’t know who he and Corrine will turn to because “he really did a lot of thinking for us.”

    Eventually they all get dragged into the dance. Randy thinks one of the women was coming onto him. “I haven’t had a girl come onto me in about 20 years,” he says. Wow, shocking. He says he hates to dance, he hurt, he was full, but “hell, I danced with her.”

    Matty thinks he’ll be voted out next, but this was a good break from the game and some desperately needed relief.

    At Kota, Kenny’s out in the boat, stuck on some branch and going in circles. He says he’s getting to know how to play this game. With Bob gone, he’s the only man “with two very beautiful women.” Uh, ok. “If people want to take me out, I will take them out before me,” Kenny adds. He says he knows for a fact he can win this game. Oh, little Kenny, beware of cockiness!

    Off at Exile, Bob of course chooses the clue. “That’s a real clear choice for me, because I’m deep doodoo at camp,” he says. I believe “doodoo” is a scientific term.

    He gets to where the idol should be. And was. He’s frustrated, and does think perhaps Sugar found the idol. So he makes a fake idol, which is much more elaborate than that stick whoever it was used last time. It involves making a shellac to stick beads on a rock and tying feathers and other dangly things off it. It really looks quite real. Bob hopes to fool people with it into not even trying to vote for him. He says it’s like if someone thinks you have a gun, even if you don’t, they might leave you alone.


    This Is What You Get For Letting Others Do Your Domestic Work

    Back at camp, treemail for the immunity challenge tells them they’ll have to be the best firestarter to win. Randy says they could give Crystal a book of matches and gasoline and she wouldn’t be able to start a fire. “If I see Crystal again I’ll puke,” he gripes. “She made her bed back in the old Fang and I still hold a major grudge.”

    Heading into the challenge, they don’t know if this is going to be individual challenge or if it will ever, ever be merge time. But Jeff informs them that yes, finally, it is merge time. He tosses them electric blue buffs. Bob tells us it’s a new lease on life for him, because his days were numbered. Matty hugs Kenny.

    Jeff explains this challenge will test how well they would do on their own. So they’ll make fire high enough to burn through a rope. First one to do it wins immunity.

    And as they start, what eventually emerges is that the people they’ve let take care of things around camp, like Susie, are doing better. Susie is the first to get flame, whereas Matty has managed only to cut himself. Soon Sugar gets flame too, and in the end it’s a race between those two while the others just manage nothing.

    But eventually – amazingly – Susie wins. Immunity. Susie. Corrine looks like she just swallowed something nasty.

    Jeff sends them to the old Fang camp, telling them there will be supplies there to make a new flag.

    Randy says he hated Fang from the beginning, and there’s no way he’s going to stay with Crystal. “She’ll be gone or I’ll be gone,” he says. You know, I know Crystal was a bit annoying there at the start, but I really don’t know what she did that was so awful.


    Everybody Wants Some Sugar

    The new tribe goes to Fang. Matty raves about how there was rice, canned food and coffee. But as soon as the “brief gratitude session” was over, people fled for the jungle to start strategizing.

    Randy tells Charlie he is voting Crystal, flat-out. Charlie feels confident he, Bob, Randy and Corrine are a solid four. And Matty, Kenny, Crystal and Susie are four. So that leaves Sugar as the swing vote, with ties to both sides.

    Corrine pounces on her first. Sugar says she can’t live with Randy, but Corrine says while she understands that, it would be shooting themselves in the foot. Corrine and Charlie promise her they’d do Randy next, but that they need to out someone else this time.

    “Not only do I have to act interested in what Sugar’s saying, I have to act like I care about her,” Corrine says. “Sugar is so weak and naïve and gullible. I’ve been nasty to her for 25 days, and I’ve been nice to her one day. It doesn’t even make sense that she buys it. She’s such a moron.” Wow, tell us how you really feel.

    In another part of the woods, Susie and Crystal and Matty and Kenny talk. Matty wants Randy out, but Crystal argues that Corrine and Charlie need to be broken up. Kenny says it’s Charlie, because he’s the brains. He isn’t really, but Kenny’s pissed that Charlie took that paper about that hidden idol. “I made it up, and everyone listened to me,” Kenny says. “I’m like a little rat.”

    Kenny goes to Sugar, and pushes the idea that Charlie is the brain of the other four and it’s time to get him out.

    “I think I’m the lady of the hour,” Sugar says, noting that everyone’s coming to her for her vote. Sugar says she doesn’t trust Kenny or Crystal. In fact, she doesn’t trust anyone. They should have sent Matty to her, if you ask me.

    When everyone reconvenes, they decide to name the tribe Nobag, Gabon backwards. Seriously?


    Who’s The Moron Now?

    Naturally, they go off to council with Sugar still claiming to be conflicted and torn. What will she do?

    Jeff brings in Marcus, their first jury member. Charlie and Corrine both beam at him like puppies.

    Jeff asks Randy about that argument at the reward challenge. Randy says Matty’s shots would make 9 times out of 10. If everyone would have shut up and listened to him, he had a shot that would make it 10 times out of 10. Sure you did, Randy.

    Charlie said it’s important to communicate and that broke down.

    Randy agrees with Jeff that he didn’t miss Fang once he left. Crystal asks Randy why he has issues with her. She says if she has problems with people, it’s open. “What’d I do to Randy?

    “You made Fang a living hell,” Randy answers. “You and your boy GC. You and your posse ran the tribe like it was a gang.” Wow, that’s a bit …. Racist? Isn’t it?

    He says they were arrogant and were the reason why they lost all those times. Crystal says she doesn’t regret any of her emotions. “This is Crystal, what you see is what you get.”

    Charlie says if you’re just saying something for “your own selfish reasons” it doesn’t make sense. He says people need to process what comes out of their mouths.

    Randy says Kenny isn’t a little kid anymore, he’s grown up since Randy was last in a tribe with him.

    Jeff asks Sugar if going to Exile so much meant she didn’t have the same opportunity to irritate people as Randy and Crystal. She says no, it gave people a chance to talk about her. But she says she doesn’t irritate people, she doesn’t talk about them behind their backs.

    Randy votes for Crystal, whispering “bitch.” Sugar comes back in tears.

    Jeff reads the votes, and the first four are for Crystal – Randy wrote “C.C.” meaning Crystal Cox, meaning Jeff has to ask and out him for his vote.

    But then that next vote is for Charlie, as are the next three. So when it stands at four votes each. And the last vote is ….. Charlie. He’s out! And can join his beloved Marcus. Corrine looks stunned. Yeah, I guess Sugar isn’t that much of a moron after all, is she?

    Charlie leaves with a wave. He tells us afterwards that it was a “disaster” And he didn’t see it coming. But there’s a bright side! He can finally rejoin his BFF. “I can’t wait to see Marcus,” Charlie gushes.

    Jeff says it’s clear the merge has had an impact on this game and it should make for a crazy finish. To me, it’s clear Randy and Corrine are just flat-out mean, unpleasant people.


    Next week:

    Next time Randy says he’s “going to burn this house down.” Some people say he’s crazy, and Randy also tells Matty he’s on the outs. Kenny also tells Crystal that he’s the glue holding them together. Ah, Kenny. As I said before, beware of the cocky.
    It's such a fine line between stupid, and clever. -- David St. Hubbins

  2. #2
    Semi-old guy! Hutch's Avatar
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    Re: Survivor: Gabon, 11/13 recap: Merged and Mean

    I respect the way Crystal is playing the game. I think suddenly, when needed, her athletic skills will come out and she'll surprise everyone.

    I also think she will back stab Kenny in a skinny minute. When Corrine and Randy are both eliminated I'll be a happy camper.

    So far my favorites are Bob and Sugar.
    If I get too cranky, would someone wipe the drool off my chin and send me to the home!

  3. #3
    runs with scissors waywyrd's Avatar
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    Re: Survivor: Gabon, 11/13 recap: Merged and Mean

    But eventually – amazingly – Susie wins. Immunity. Susie. Corrine looks like she just swallowed something nasty.
    That was hilarious.

    And...Nobag? Worst tribe name EVER.

    Loved the recap, Lucy!
    It was me. I let the dogs out.

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    Re: Survivor: Gabon, 11/13 recap: Merged and Mean

    Sugar says she doesn’t trust Kenny or Crystal. In fact, she doesn’t trust anyone. They should have sent Matty to her, if you ask me.
    EXACTLY what I said. I'm surprised she voted with Kenny. If Matty wants Sugar to stay on their side, he needs to do some damage control with her.

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