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Thread: Paulie's Precaps - Episode 7: Pearls on Piled Dirt

  1. #11
    COMBAT MISSIONS junkie! BravoFan's Avatar
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    Brilliant Paulie!

    The entire post-Shawna analysis was absolutely hysterical.
    "They can only edit what you give them. They cannot manufacture a fictional character out of thin air." (Bill Rancic - 4/04)
    Regarding editing reality TV: "You can't edit IN a bad personality." ("Cali"-11/02)
    BB8 - A "conveyor belt of human garbage." ("Pono" - 9/07)

  2. #12
    Premium Member dagwood's Avatar
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    I loved the whole recap...especially the phone booth! Great job, Paulie!
    He who laughs last thinks slowest

    #oldmanbeatdown - Donny BB16

  3. #13
    JR.
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    All my favorites have already been quoted. Paulie, you're a genius.

  4. #14
    plaisirs volatils raindance's Avatar
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    Meanwhile, back at Tambaqui Camp, Heidi is busy half-heartedly doing the tribal dishes. She’s wearing her Far Side old lady glasses today, and her hair cascades about her shoulders like a yellow waterfall of dried-out, sun-baked, cheap yarn. “Cute girls do not scrub pots,” she mutters angrily to herself as she proves her point by scrubbing the pots.
    Far Side glasses! You nailed it Paulie!
    simply fantastic!
    “In Rrrussia, vee have proverb: Only bad soliders don’t vant to be general.” Sasha Pivovarova

  5. #15
    Leo
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    Loved it, loved it!

  6. #16
    Sexy evil genius Paulie's Avatar
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    What I got right: there was a merge, and Deena won Immunity.

    What I got wrong: everything else.
    When you're ten years old and a car drives by and splashes a puddle of water all over you, it's hard to decide if you should go to school like that or try to go home and change and probably be late. So while he was trying to decide, I drove by and splashed him again. - Jack Handey

    Read Paulie's Precaps for Survivor:Vanuatu: 1-2-3-4-5

  7. #17
    An innocent bystander nlmcp's Avatar
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    But at least you left out the "I'll get naked for peanut butter" part

    Very funny stuff! (this Survivor thing on Wednesday is throwing me all off)
    I could go east, I could go west, it was all up to me to decide. Just then I saw a young hawk flyin' and my soul began to rise. ~Bob Seger

  8. #18
    The race is back! John's Avatar
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    Dave immediately throws an elbow into Alex’s face and charges one of the five mounds. Heidi whips off her top and kisses Rob on the lips. He faints. Matthew disappears and re-materializes on top of one of the dirt piles with a pearl in his hand. Jeff swears and pulls a tranquilizer gun out of his back pocket. As Matthew trots back to Jeff to present his pearl, Jeff shoots a feathered dart into his leg. “Hreep!” Matthew says before crashing to the ground like a tree made out of human bones. The pearl rolls out of his hand. Alex, woozy from the blow to the head, scoops up the marble and shows Jeff.
    Hilarious as usual, Paulie!

  9. #19
    It ain't easy being green Wayner's Avatar
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    Okay, I am painfully behind on my precap and recap reading. But actually, reading this after several episodes have passed have given me an even deeper respect for Paulie's gift of looking into the future. Here are some of my favorite quotes:

    “I’ll take care of coming on to Alex and spurning Matt. That shouldn’t be difficult. Oh, and if I have time, I’ll humiliate Rob. Shawna hadn’t done that yet, but I’m sure it was in her plans.”

    Of course, Matthew wins, and as an unexpected consequence, the others can no longer remember their own birthdays.

    She’s wearing her Far Side old lady glasses today, and her hair cascades about her shoulders like a yellow waterfall of dried-out, sun-baked, cheap yarn. “Cute girls do not scrub pots,” she mutters angrily to herself as she proves her point by scrubbing the pots.

    “Not for long,” Roger says before clapping a hand over his mouth and staring at Heidi with wide eyes. “Wow, did I say that out loud? Anyway, get to work. I’m off to go play with Christy and the boys.”

    Then I’ll call you from this Cingular Wireless phone.” He whips out a small telephone and caresses it lovingly while delivering a squinty-eyed, toothy mega-grin into the camera.

    Immediately, Rob spins Heidi around to face him, grabs her under the arms, and races into the booth, slamming her against the far interior wall.

    The entire "Jeff waiting for someone to answer the phone" thing.

    “What are you talking about?” Rob asks. “We just finished voting, like, three seconds ago. How could you get there and back? Wait a minute! Are you The Mole?” I can't breath!!!

    “Huh,” Jeff says. “Guess that was a real voodoo doll after all. Weird.”
    The entire mounds of dirt descriptions - awesome. Paulie, you are still The Master!
    Last edited by Wayner; 04-16-2003 at 05:44 PM.

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