Down to a single member, Ulong faces total annihilation if
theyshe loses the next immunity challenge. Burnett has a real dilemma on his hands, if Stephenie goes to Tribal Council by herself she can't vote herself out and being the only contestant she can't lose an elimination challenge. Does Burnett have the cahonies to risk an eighth immunity challenge or will he wuss out and send Stephanie over to Koror to beg them to let her to join their tribe so she can have a shower, brush her teeth and eat a meal that isn't three fourths dirt and twigs?
Tune in and find out, on this week's exciting new episode:
"It would get really lonely out here if it wasn't for the camera guys, the sound guys, the producers, the PA's, the first aid guy and that guy who just stands there holding the clipboard. What does that guy do?"
"Good thing I kept the left over matches from the immunity challenge".
"Eat your heart out Bobby Jon".
"All by myself
Don't wanna be
All by myself
"I thought we had it rough because room service stopped at 9pm, but I overheard the crew saying that Ulong doesn't even have room service".
"Ah, the touch of a man and no risk of sex. It's so wonderful".
"There are no [air quotes] male friends [/air quotes] on the island for me to play with so I'm getting quite cranky. I even pretended Caryn was a guy for a while but it wasn't satisfying".
"I can barely see anything down there".
Must resist urge to make "throws like a girl" joke!!!
"I'm really starting to feel sorry for myself, I'd have myself a good cry but what's the point when there's no one around to share it with and no double chocolate chocolate-chip ice cream to eat?"
There is no way she's paddling that far by herself. I call Shenanigans!
"I'm gonna have friends, and food, and fresh water, clean teeth and fresh breath, a working toilet, a dry place to sleep, laundry service and cable TV!".
I guess making two trips never occurred to her. On a completely unrelated topic, why did Ulong lose so many challenges?
"Having someone new in town is great, someone who doesn't think of me like their brother".
"Here, brown is the new blue".
"I was so glad to be done with Ulong, and it's not that I have anything against those losers. It's just nice to be around people who don't suck".
"Katie shot up Stephenie's butt the second she got here".
OK, I'm not touching that one!
"Ah! It's Tom! Swim, swim damn you! Swim for your life!"
"We come with ancient teachings, Umma gunia trubetta, Ni!"
"What does that mean in English?"
"How to serve Whitey".
"We use this as bait to catch tiny fish, we use the tiny fish to catch small fish, we use the small fish to catch bigger fish, then we use those fish to catch the big fish that we eat".
"That sounds like a lot of work".
"Well you can always what we do, just jump in and slash 'em with a machete".
They needed someone to teach them to catch small fish to use as bait for bigger fish? Hasn't anyone on Koror ever fished before?
You can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar, but it looks like you can catch way more with rotting fish!
"I can show them Tom! You go fish, us girls are going to catch more bait".
"What is it?"
"It's a fish, Duh!"
Ow! Watch it Tom, that's a cod. You stick yourself with them and you stand a good chance of it getting infected and their fins are mildly toxic. I've been stabbed before, it's not a pleasant experience.
"The guys were a little disapointed with the size of the fish they caught. Compared to the fish Ulong caught they were huge but apparantly the ones that got away were all this big".
"You know what this needs?"
"Teeny tiny umbrellas?"
"Tom, you're wasted. What show do you think this is, The Bachelor?"
"Tom you're drunk, go to sleep".
"I'm not drunk".
"You're drunk, you can't even lay down without holding on".
Hey! Why don't you give them the Ulong canoe? It's not like you're ever going to use it again!
"Wow! I've never been attracted to a woman before..."
"I have this game dialed in, I'm in control, I own this game, nothing happens here unless I want it to. I'm the Puppet Master, no wait, that's not gay enough. I'm the Marionette Maestro, Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. This game is mine!"
Is that Katie? The Survivor diet's really working for her.
"Binky has other places to be and other great works to do. As goes Binky, so goes tribal immunity. Say fairwell to both".
"How to recognize different types of immunity challenges from quite a long way away. Number one, the Perch. The Perch. The Perch".
"Coby, going for donuts. And Janu?!"
"I'm only going because there is more fat in one of those donuts than in my body and if I don't eat something soon I'll be too thin for America's Next Top Model".
I didn't know that was possible.
"If I wasn't the Marionette Maestro I wouldn't dare tease eveyone like this".
"Got any Baluts? I'd jump for a couple of Baluts".
Oh sure, swipe my lines! Thanks Ian!
"And now for something completely different: Number one, The Perch".
"Fifteen chocolate chip cookies and a glass of milk".
Four! Four people jumped for cookies and milk?
It's Tom verses Steph, this could go on until dawn.
"Hey! No double-dipping".
"Does it matter?"
"Are the anchovies? I'm not jumping if there are anchovies".
"No, no anchovies".
"That pizza's mine baby!"
"Wow, standing room only tonight. Tribal council hasn't been this crowded in a long time".
"It wasn't me! What do I have to do to get these people to vote me off this damn island?"
This has nothing to do with the show but, Wow! That's a sweet looking car. And it's a Pontiac? Really?