+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 31

Thread: Paulie's Precaps - Episode 1: Three Clay Mats Up Wins Beers

  1. #11
    Shark Week! dagwood's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    salt lake city ut
    Age
    43
    Posts
    18,698
    Quote Originally Posted by Paulie

    “How could I have made myself a new leg in fifteen seconds?” Chad goes on, raising an eyebrow. Lea stares at him blankly. “I had it already. Does that make sense?”

    “Ohhh!” Lea says, nodding in comprehension. “I get it! They gave you that when they put you in. Just in case.”


    You made my weekend Paulie! I logged onto Yahoo and there was a link to the pre-cap! woohoo!
    He who laughs last thinks slowest

    Maybe we should chug on over to namby pamby land where we can find some self confidence for you, you jackwagon!

  2. #12
    FORT Fogey Super Goten's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Ohio
    Age
    24
    Posts
    1,051
    This is my first time reading a Precap, and I thought it was great! LOL, I can't wait for more!
    Favorite Reality Tv Quote Ever:
    "You have to do it. You have to accomplish your dreams." - Charla, The Amazing Race 5

  3. #13
    Up Where They Belong SurvivorGirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    San Francisco
    Age
    22
    Posts
    1,690
    Yay! Precaps are back!!!

    Great job Paulie. As always.

  4. #14
    Yogini Suxie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2003
    Location
    midwest
    Posts
    396
    Oh thank you, thank you. Paulie is BACCCKK!

    I also think Scout will be the first to go. As soon as I saw that her luxury item was a nose flute (I am not making this up) I thought: "Sonya, but worse."

    Namaste.

  5. #15
    Premium Member glennajo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Location
    middle of nowhere
    Posts
    1,313
    Your first precap of the season was AWESOME!!
    Quote Originally Posted by Paulie
    Now, as you can see, I have all the amenities a modern seer could hope for, including one of those slide-your-credit-card transmitter thingies, which has really come in handy and saves wear on tear on my valuable wrists, which play such a vital role in coaxing the mysteries of the future from the confines of my cracked crystal ball.

    “Friends are always welcome. Strangers may stay for dinner.”

    Super job, as usual, Paulie!!

  6. #16
    RESIDENT JEDI MASTER Stargazer's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    On a Rocky Mountain High
    Age
    38
    Posts
    11,928
    I don't know how you manage it, but you just get better and better, Paulie. Hilarious as always. I'm also always totally awestruck by the visual images you paint. I could almost "see" Jeff and the submarine rising out of the ocean. Amazing. The torpedo idea was brilliant. Why can't they arrive that way? I think we'd all like to see that.

    Quote Originally Posted by Paulie
    I can only conclude that each of these tragic futures must have come true for this doomed lot, for I have not seen any of them return.

    Heck, even the total loser who gets voted out first will never again do anything as cool as this in their entire existence. And that’s....pretty sad.”

    Wide-eyed, he looks back into the camera and speaks as the waters of the South Pacific rapidly climb up his body. “Thirty-nine days! Eighteen Americans! One....Surviblublurblubble.”

    “And how are you do – oh, my god!” He catches sight of Chad’s prosthetic leg. “We’ve got a soldier down over here!” he exclaims. “Lost a leg in the tube!” He tips his head back and closes his eyes. “Medic!” he bellows. This had me laughing out loud. As well as the Brady/FBI thing

    “ “Oh, please!” he exclaims in protest. “Any strategic-minded chimpanzee would have bounced Rob out of the game as soon as he started flaunting that two-person alliance of his.”

    The Survivors scramble around for several seconds, chattering to one another excitedly as they try to determine who belongs to which tribe. Eventually, someone realizes there are only two tribal colors, not three, and that simplifies things. Not long after that, somebody else notices that the men and women each have different colors. In less than a minute after that momentous realization, the tribes are standing single-file in front of Jeff, men on one side, women on the other.
    What was I going to say? Oh, yeah, it’s a region steeped in mystic tradition.”

    “Steeped?” Ami asks. “Like a tea bag?”

    Jeff pauses and looks at her thoughtfully. “Yeah, I guess so. I think that’s where that phrase comes from.”

    “That’s pretty weird, don’t you think?” she persists. “So these islands are like a giant cup of tea, and this mystic tradition you refer to is all bundled together in some sort of cultural tea bag to be distributed around the islands in a uniform fashion?”

    “Look,” Jeff says angrily, pointing an index finger at her. He pauses and squints at her for a moment. “Let’s just drop it.”




    He gestures around him, carefully ignoring the growing number of flaming trees.

    “All right, all right,” Jeff says. “Ease ‘er down.” He drops the doormat to the ground, which sends a large puff of sand into the air. “We’re obviously not sending you to that house. Yet.
    Great job, Paulie
    "Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter."- Yoda

    "I'll just see where Providence takes me and try to look like I got there confidently." - Craig Ferguson

  7. #17
    Horror of Horrors emjoi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Posts
    1,023
    I assume UFOs and mysterious chain smokers are going to turn up sooner or later.

  8. #18
    Wonky snarkmistress Lucy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Playing kickball for the beer
    Age
    38
    Posts
    8,870
    That was brilliant, Paulie. I loved the fire scene, the sub, the FBI thing and much more. I'll quote just one line that put me in a fit of giggles:

    “Thirty-nine days! Eighteen Americans! One....Surviblublurblubble.”
    It's such a fine line between stupid, and clever. -- David St. Hubbins

  9. #19
    Leo
    Leo is offline
    Premium Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Posts
    10,033
    Ah, if only the show was like this... we bow before the Precap.

  10. #20
    Go Adria and Natalie! CaNaDiAn FaN's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Lauryn's Hill
    Age
    22
    Posts
    941
    “How could I have made myself a new leg in fifteen seconds?” Chad goes on, raising an eyebrow. Lea stares at him blankly. “I had it already. Does that make sense?”

    “Ohhh!” Lea says, nodding in comprehension. “I get it! They gave you that when they put you in. Just in case.”


    “Islands of FIRE!” he says, firmly pressing a round red button on the remote with both thumbs. “FIRE!” click “FIRE!!” click “Come on!” he implores. “FIIIIIRE!!”


    “This season, half of you – the nine that do not make the jury – will be served as refreshments at a local banquet.”
    If only that really happened.

    Great pre-cap Paulie! I'm looking forward to the rest of the season!
    Currently Watching:
    Big Brother 5 - Canadian Idol

    - Nokomis - Theresa

+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0 ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.