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Thread: Paulie's Precaps - Episode 7b: Watch The Parts, Too

  1. #11
    FORT Fogey
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    Paulie, you kick some serious butt when it comes to writing these.. Hilarious as usual! You are truly a great writer!

  2. #12
    Premium Member Bumpkin's Avatar
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    In a flash, Rupert’s hand shoots out to the side and grasps JP by the beak. JP gives a muffled shriek and flaps his wings in an effort to get away. Rupert opens his eyes and smiles at his prisoner. “Well, hello there, little fella,” he says. He leans in close and makes eye contact with the panicky bird. “Wrong box,” he rumbles, releasing JP.
    Perfect touch!

  3. #13
    Shark Week! dagwood's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paulie
    Jeff reads the next slip of paper. “Second vote. Burton. Third vote. Shawn.” Jeff executes a perfect double-take as he reviews the ballot he just read. He gathers the next one. “Fourth vote. Shawn.” He turns the parchment around so the Outcasts can see it. The same hurried scrawl that was on the first Shawn vote appears here. No attempt has been made to disguise the handwriting. Jeff looks at the final two votes. “OK, the last two votes were also for Shawn.”

    A whoop of delight splits the air from the direction of the voting “booth.” Shawn appears, jumping up and down with his hands waving around high in the air over his head. “I’m back, baby!” he yells. “I am BACK! Aww, it feels good!” He runs over and grabs his torch, holding it out for Jeff to re-light.
    ----------
    Darrah’s head recoils in confusion. “Baione awn me? You wawn’ get slapped?”


    Great job, Paulie.
    He who laughs last thinks slowest

    Maybe we should chug on over to namby pamby land where we can find some self confidence for you, you jackwagon!

  4. #14
    FORT Fogey
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    Paulie, great job as usual! I should be in bed, but I just had to read it. I couldn't wait because the next chance I'll get isn't for awhile! Loved it! Absolutely loved it. Too much to quote! Not enough time to do it in, either!

  5. #15
    FORT Fanatic Luna's Avatar
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    Great job as usual, Paulie! The bit at Loser Lodge really got me laughing!

  6. #16
    FORT Regular calkreks's Avatar
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    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Meanwhile, Rupert runs over to the Morgan boat and begins hacking the bow of the boat with the Immunity Idol. Soon, a large hole is visible in the hull and still Rupert keeps chopping away.

    “What are you doing, Rupert?” Andrew yells from the Morgan mat.

    “I’m plunderin’,” Rupert replies with a sinister smile.

    “Boy, he really has a problem with that word, doesn’t he?” Ryan says. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard him use it right.”
    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------


    Hilarious from start to finish. Great job Paulie!

  7. #17
    Starbucks is your friend Bill's Avatar
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    “Hey, Shoulders! Easy on the escargots! We’re on a reduced caloric intake, for heaven’s sake! We don’t want you developing the gout on your way to Tribal Council.”


    Too funny!
    "George Oscar Bluth II, aka GOB, featured magician in the best selling videotape, "Girls With Low Self Esteem" invites you to enter his world.
    -- Arrested Development, Season III

  8. #18
    FORT Fan Tracker's Avatar
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    OMG, Paulie that was the best yet.

  9. #19
    Back from the dead! brusch's Avatar
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    Pretty tight ship you’re running over there, Savage.
    ...., JP's back
    Tremendous job again Paulie!
    Log off. That cookie sh*t makes me nervous. --Tony Soprano

    So I said to him, "Look, buddy, your car was upside down when we got here. And as for your Grandma, she shouldn't have mouthed off like that!" --Homer Simpson

  10. #20
    FORT Fogey veejer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paulie
    He pauses to take a deep breath. “Man, I should’ve thought about this little speech before I got here. Anyway. I’ll read the votes.”
    Can't wait to hear Jeff's speech tonight!! Bet it won't be as funny!!
    Rupert scowls at the clue for a while, then crumples it in his hand. “Who writes these hideous poems?” he growls. “I hate ‘em. Why not just tell us what we’re going to be doing? Why does everything have to rhyme? It’s ridiculous.”
    In a flash, Rupert’s hand shoots out to the side and grasps JP by the beak. JP gives a muffled shriek and flaps his wings in an effort to get away. Rupert opens his eyes and smiles at his prisoner. “Well, hello there, little fella,” he says. He leans in close and makes eye contact with the panicky bird. “Wrong box,” he rumbles, releasing JP.
    Yeah!!! JP is back!! Only Rupert could get away with that.

    Thank you so much Paulie!!! The above quotes were just a few of my favorites.

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