Welcome back, dancing fans! Did you miss me? No? Well, did you at least miss our top fourteen? They took last week off, and now they're back to impress us all once again. There are so many questions that have to be answered. Which dance form will Cedric stink up this week? Who will come up with this week's best choreography? And, most importantly: how many eardrums will Mary Murphy rupture?
We start off with our accustomed overdramatic intro from Cat Deeley and the weekly introduction of our remaining dancers. Occupying the third seat besides Nigel and Mary is Adam Shankman, who just happens to be the director of “the biggest dance film of the year,” Hairspray. Miraculously enough, it's not a Fox movie. Oh, and it's Nigel's birthday. We get the usual silly interview questions. Nigel explains how Jessi went out last week, Mary misses Jesus, and Adam our guest judge comes out with a woefully bad Cat pun. Really, two weeks and all you can manage is that?
The Weekly Fluff Question is: what does America not know about you? Kameron and Lacey are first up, and he admits to being a bit of a daredevil. The red hair just might have been a clue, don't you think? Lacey admits to being a former hair model, and it turns out a great deal of her current luxuriant locks are... a weave. Whether that's an endorsement of hair weaves, we leave up to the experts.
This couple will be doing the hustle, courtesy of Maria Torres. According to her, this might be the toughest dance for this couple. We'll be the judge of that. Just to reinforce that point, we get the oh-my-god-we-might-stink quotes from both of them.
On stage, it's vaguely disco-ish, but that could just be the music. The chemistry's there, as usual, and while it's not quite their best effort, it's not bad at all. As Cat says: “So that's the hustle!” Yes, we're educated here as well.
Adam likes the showmanship, and closes by saying it was awesome. Mary says it was the first true hustle they've had, and says Lacey killed it. Nigel likes it, but warns that Kameron might be being overshadowed by Lacey. Heck, can anyone not be overshadowed by Lacey? As for her, Nigel says she has better technique than Benji. That will not be the last time we hear of him. Unfortunately.
Shauna and Cedric are next. Shauna's “secret” is... she's a snowboarder. Yawn. Cedric was once a high school mascot. The brief shot we get is... scary. Not as scary as Cedric's dancing, but pretty close. Not too interesting either. Can we get some real tabloid-level admissions, please?
Alex da Silva will be coaching this couple through the mambo, another spicy, hot, Latin dance. Apparently, word of Cedric's stunning partnering skills is spreading among the SYTYCD choreographer corps, and Alex brought three assistants to share in the agony of coaching Cedric. Hardly a ringing endorsement, is it? Shauna doesn't seem that confident either.
They come out to a Tito Puente number, and the choreography seems to have a healthy dose of Shauna doing spins and Cedric doing what he does best... which, in a partner dance, is not much. It feels all vaguely mechanical, and to borrow Alex's words: that didn't feel particularly hot.
Adam, though, says it was better than he expected it to be. Word of Cedric's skillz is getting around. He says Cedric stepped up, and that Shauna was fantastic. We learn something new from Mary's judging: apparently choreography only last five and a half hours. She also changes her tune (and volume): she wants him to stay this week. Nigel also likes Shauna's bit, and says he was very proud of Cedric. Our verdict: it was better than we expected, which is to say it didn't stink so much.
Danny and Anya are next. Anya's secret is she was a blonde back in Russia, and she was studying international law – as she says, she was legally blonde. Yes, we groaned with you. Danny has a penchant for sunglasses – saying he spent more on those than on food. This week: it's contemporary, courtesy of Tyce Diorio.
It seems to be that most contemporary dancers have some sort of “story”. This one is about... a man and a woman. He says it's too late to apologize, there's sweat, sexuality... are we the only one who's utterly confused?
It's another one of those love-it-or-hate-it contemporary routines. Aside from a little moment at the start of rolling around on the floor – down, boys – it's not that interesting. It seems well done, but it left us more than a little cold. Not a whole lot of chemistry or excitement.
Adam praises Danny, saying he's a beautiful dancer, but he got disconnected from Anya at times. Translation: it's not always about you, Danny. Mary is also impressed, and says Danny is good at jumping. Anya, for her part, is ridiculous. In a good way. Nigel likes it, but takes a swing at contemporary choreographers. He also says that Danny has to dance so that viewers at home want to vote – it's not just about technique. Adam picks up on this, and specifically says there's just a teeny bit of arrogance. Just a teeny bit? There's an understatement. Even if Nigel thinks Adam was talking crap, we happen to be on Adam's side this time.
Next up is the newly formed couple of Sara and Pasha. The tomboyish Sara was a former figure skater – at least, until seventh grade. That was... a long time ago, to put it mildly. Meanwhile, our Hot Russian Pasha, turns out to be something of a computer guy as well. Not bad, not bad at all.
They'll be doing the West Coast Swing, courtesy of... Benji Schwimmer. I told you we weren't done with him. He's the champion of West Coast Swing, so that – and his win last year – qualifies him to become a choreographer. Uh huh. Oh, and we get a lesson on how to be sexy. Nice way towastespend five and a half hours, eh?
For a newly formed couple, the chemistry is superb. Scratch that, for any couple it would have been good. Pasha just seems to be able to bring the best out of his partner, each and every time. It's a very good number – high energy, excellent crowd reaction, and a few superb cartwheels. Excellent in every way – maybe even the best of the night so far.
Just for variety, Nigel gets to comment first. According to him, that's the “magic” he was speaking about. Adam is pretty impressed, saying if they auditioned for him, they'd have a job. Mary unleashes a mid-level scream, and yep, she likes it too. She bestows the title of “king of partners” on Pasha as well. Oh, one more thing. That ringing you hear? Benji, your fifteen minutes are up.
Just past the halfway mark on our clock. Sabra and Dominic are next. She, it turns out was in High School Musical. Dominic, it turns out, has a secret crush on someone else on the show. That someone is... Cat Deeley! Dom, two thoughts here. One, it's a British accent, not French. Secondly, this is a woman who is a bit handy with a saber – at least when it comes to opening champagne bottles with them. So you be careful, you hear?
Anyways, Shane Sparks returns for a hip-hop routine. Just to continue a recurring theme on this show, we get one – just one – shot – of Sabra falling, while doing some weird handstand. According to Shane, with a hot girl, a hot boy, you need a hot song... you get a picture, viewers at home. Since when did Shane get reduced to a Paris Hilton vocabulary?
Well, okay, to be fair, it is a hot dance. For a hip-hop dance, there are a lot of get-to-know-you-really well moments, and that special handstand move we saw in rehearsal is terrific. But overall, it's somewhat disappointing. It's this pair's good chemistry that takes it from so-so to good.
Adam says that the dance made hip-hop tell a story, and he thinks they did a great job. Mary says it was magic, and they didn't let anyone down. And, of course, she parodies her own reputation for the scream. Nigel says it was terrible – that it was so short. Maybe they're just seeing something I can't.
Only two couples are left: next up is Jaime and Hok. She's a frustrated basketball player, but at 5 feet 3 inches that was never destined to work. As for Hok... he's a frustrated violinist. Let's just say I hope his dancing is better than his music. Yikes.
Toni Redpath will guide this pair through... the waltz. This could be... interesting, shall we say. We get another story as background, and our choreographer asks if there's a crush involved. Neither one wants to answer. Now there's something we'd have preferred to be answered, don't you agree?
Considering that neither of these two comes from a ballroom background, they did surprisingly well. It's not quite a total disaster, but it's not that good either. It's probably not the most technically proficient or challenging, but we'll give this pair some leeway.
Adam says it suited Jaime, but that he felt sorry for Hok, for whom it was not suited at all. Mary is decidedly unimpressed; she makes it clear that she didn't think it worked. Nigel praises the choreography, saying played to her strengths, and took their minds off the fact that it wasn't really a waltz. He doesn't think “it was good enough”. It all sounds a bit harsh, but it's the truth.
Neil and Lauren are closing out the show tonight. Lauren says she has an Asian alter ego, Misha. Ooookay. Did someone forget their medication? We're just asking. As for Neil... he says he can make Wookiee sounds. Someone has too much time on their hands.
Their routine will be... jazz, courtesy of Wade Robson. You know what this means: throw out the rule books. The story is a good and evil one, apparently. Neil is a villain, Lauren is an angel. Doesn't sound right, does it? And yes, we have no idea what in the world Wade is talking about.
It's a typical Wade Robson number – off the wall would be close. The story does make sense, sort of, and they do an excellent job of getting that across. The choreography is about what you'd expect, and Lauren gets in some choice faux-acting moments pretending to run away in horror one minute and kicking Neil's behind soon after. Excellent job throughout.
Adam is pretty happy with it saying it's everything dancing is about. He also points out that Neil was at his best, because it wasn't just about his “tricks”, but his performance overall. Mary thinks they really pulled it off. Nigel thinks they saved the best for last, and says they executed it brillantly.
Now, was that good enough to make up for the one-week vacation? Yeah, it'll do. Still, someone has to go. Yours truly will bring the recap for results night a little later. Oh, and Hilary Duff will be appearing there. Why? We have no idea.
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