Hello, my fellow FORT dance fans, it is already time for another season of our usual summertime guilty TV viewing pleasure, which FOX has graciously moved to the fall season. Yippee. We get a montage of the season that just went past (was it only a few weeks ago) where Jeanine Mason emerged as America’s Favorite Dancer.
Cat Deely, comes out looking lovely in a white Grecian style short dress and asks the audience if they are ready for Season 6, and Season 6 is repeated so often I could start a drinking game. Anywho,
our usual suspects, judges Nigel Lythogue, banshee screechingMary Murphy, and guest judge Hollywood director Adam Shankman are here to find talent in LA LA Land, otherwise known as Los Angeles.
First up on the floor, is a crazy dancer named Cole Clemens, who talks to himself and without music generally gyrates like a freak, it was one of the most disturbing and yet hysterical auditions that I have ever seen on this show, and the rest of the judges seem to echo my sentiments, as they can’t hold their laughter while watching this travesty of a dance. Needless to say Cole is sent on his way, and next we get our first sob story of the season, as Mollee Gray, a contemporary dancer who was in High School Musical 1 thru 3, (like one of these movies weren’t bad enough, don’t get me started),comes in to audition. We hear how her mom sacrificed everything so that her baby can grow up to get on this show. Whatever, I feel a tear coming to my eye. Not. Enough of the sob stories just dance already. She twirls, leaps and jumps, and I am already bored, but obviously I know nothing because the judges just love her to pieces and we get the first Golden Ticket of the season. We then get a montage of contemporary dancers that also make it to Vegas, but all I can remember is the hottie with the underwear, so sue me, I have to get my thrills from this show somewhere.
And we get some returning contestants including Ryan Kasprzak, who lost out on the final spot in last season’s top 20 to his younger brother Evan; will he get another chance to make his dream come true? I swear the writers of this show write Harlequin romances. Gag. I have to admit Ryan has gotten better since we last saw him, I loved his tap audition, he talks and dances, (what’s with the talking and dancing tonight, shut up already), but at least his dancing was fun and energetic and definitely enjoyable. The judges say this is the best audition they have ever seen and he is off to Vegas. Now something fun happens, Bianca Revels, another tapper who auditioned last year and then decided to give it once last shot, comes to the stage and Nigel asks her if she is willing to do a tap battle , she is eager to battle Ryan and we get one of the more enjoyable moments of the night. I love that tappers are really standing out, and these two are worth watching. I’d say this battle was a draw, and Bianca also joins Ryan going to Vegas.
Now some more weird and awful auditions to get through, including Chris Aguilar, who wants to produce a movie, so what better way to do that is to go on a reality dance show. Yippee, another famewhore, but this one is only going to be famous in his own mind, because his dancing was a trip to the twilight zone, all while lifting up his pant legs, making stupid faces, and just generally being a nightmare to watch. The judges were underwhelmed, and he explains that he was trying to do the woman’s part to All That Jazz. As a woman, I am insulted that he feels that a woman would dance like that, and after much discussion he sent back out to his own reality where everyone thinks he is God’s gift to dance. I just thank God I don’t have to watch him anymore.
We get another sob story, but at least this was one seemed more genuine then most of the ones we hear and her name is Amber Williams, a contemporary dancer, who I would route for just for her dancing alone no sob story needed. As well we get to see a Salsa Hip Hop Dancer named Christina, who mixes Salsa and Hip Hop in a unique and fun way, and the judges love them both and send them straight through to Vegas.
And they save the best audition of the night as the final one of the show, another tap dancer named Phillip Attmore, he reminds me of the old Hollywood dancers, namely Gene Kelly. It was fun, energetic, entertaining, just the best of the best by far tonight. He is definitely one to keep your eye on this season, and the judges send him tapping all the way to Vegas.
And that’s all for this week folks, join me next week as we head to the desert of Phoenix, Arizona and we get a few surprises including the return of the same sex ballroom couple. Fun times ahead. Hope to see you all then.