*This is a recap of events from noon Saturday to noon Monday, house time*
My shift begins with Jedi Janie walking in on conversations she isnít supposed to hear. First, in HOH with Shane and Danielle and again with Wil and Frank. Wil spills all to Janie while Frank beats a path to HOH to spill all to the First Couple. These rodents canít keep a single secret and I feel like Iím eavesdropping on the worlds worst game of Telephone ever. Janelle wants Frank nominated, obvi. POV competition happens and Shane, Joe, Ashley, Danielle, Frank, Wil are the players. Shane wins. Surprise! Only not. Of course, this sets off the scrambling and Iíd really love to give you the run down, but Iím confused. Everyone is talking crap about everyone and deals are trying to be made. Itís basically an endless loop of he said/she said, I promise, I got your back, now turn around while I stab you in it.
After all that craziness, itís time for some fun! Sushi, party of six get all gussied up for the big event! The rest of the HGís declare that they donít need to dress up to have fun and they will have their own party. BB has apparently asked the sushi party people to discuss why they chose which players to coach, who their biggest surprise has been and other inane questions that make for very dull party conversation. Meanwhile, the party inside the BB house is picking up speed. Wil strips to his skivvies, dons a jacket and a captains hat because....well, isnít that what everyone wears on their birthday? Dan & Co. Make their way inside to join the fun party and a cake fight ensues. Things are getting rowdy! The HGís are doing shots of wine, chanting ďchugĒ and playing spin the bottle. Lots of kissing happens, Ashley plants one on Boogie and Ian, totally making Ian's whole life, and probably Boogie's, too. Shane kisses Danielle. Little does he know that heís about to find a bunny boiling on the stove.
Danielle checks out the birthday boys "package"
The party is winding down and Danielle ends up in the bathroom with Janelle, grilling her about the kiss. Did it look good? Did he really want to kiss her or not? And Iím reminded of how tough Jr. High really was. Ashley busts in and confesses she really wanted to kiss Frank so the girls drag her back to the kitchen and make her do it. All around the world, people heard Ianís heart breaking. BB decides that this party is good for the feeds, so they give them another bottle of wine. Wil decides he wants to skinny dip so when the BY opens, he does just that. BB gives us fish so all we see is a shiny hiney. Wish they had had the sense to do that when Crazy James performed his ďtaint slapĒ.
Somewhere in this mix, we have Danielle crawling all over Shane in the HOH bed. These two absolutely slay me. He needs to grow a pair and she needs to get a clue. SMDH.
The look on her face says it all
*Brit suggests someone watch Joe when heís making slop dishes so they can replicate it when he leaves. Not a bad idea!
*Janelle offered up her wedding ring for a three week deal.
*Saturday is Wilís birthday.
*Janelle smushed cake on Ianís mouth even though heís a have-not and Brit stuffed some down his boxer shorts.
*Danielle rehashes the ďkissĒ with anyone and everyone that will listen.
*Boogie really dug Ashleyís kiss. Ashley? Yeah, not so much.
I know I left it around here somewhere....
Iím really glad that I decided to add a day to my weekly recap because If I had to rely on Sunday alone...this recap would suck. It would be blank except for one lone picture of a cricket chirping. Seriously, itís a lazy day in the BB house. Joe is scrambling, but nothing he is saying is remotely interesting. Thereís a lot of general chit-chat about life in the BB house (past seasons) and life after BB. But wait...we get the return of Jedi Janie and she is working hard to get Shane to use the POV and nominate Frank. She is sure the coaches are coming into the game later this week and that the HOH comp will be endurance. She wants Frank out before that happens. Janelle tells her crew that sheís flipped Brit, now Brit just has to flip Shane. Me thinks that Amazon Barbie really does have Jedi superpowers. Later, Ashley and Shane discuss taking her off and putting up Frank. They both agree theyíve seen a different side of Joe since his backs been against the wall. I have no idea what they are talking about..he seems like same old Joe to me. Annoying. The side I really want to see is his backside. Walking out the front door. Meanwhile, Brit hasnít really fallen for the Jedi tricks and still thinks noms should stay the same and Joe should leave. Sheís convinced that Wil and Frank have an F2 deal and Wil wonít vote to evict Frank. Oh wait...after another conversation, Brit is back on board with ousting Frank. But...
Oh wait...Brit has slept on it and is waffling again! Now she thinks itís a bad idea because they are just being used to do Janelleís dirty work. Meanwhile, Shane is talking to Frank, explaining that he may have to take Ashley off and put up one of Boogís players to ensure the votes to send Joe out, but assures him he will be safe. Does it hurt when your nose grows? Now that youíre just as confused as I am, I shall leave you. My shift ends with the POV meeting in progress. Did Shane use the veto and replace one nom with another? Did the return of Jedi Janie end in success? Are you as dizzy as I am? Do you ever get the get the urge to reach through the screen and bitch slap these people? I sure do.
*Janelleís convinced Frank is love with her.
*Brit says Ashley is brainwashed...like Elizabeth Smart.
*Shane and Danielle cuddle on the bed. Well, she cuddles and he lays there like a limp rag. He says he figures they have 10 more minutes before her dad (Dan) comes to get her.
Why is it not bursting into flames?