**This recap covers from noon Wednesday to noon Thursday, BB Time**
My shift today started with a bang! The housemates begin to rise. Jordan was asleep in the GR, Russ in the SS, Nat and Kev in the RR and Jeff and Michele in the HOH (yea, M&J, what is that all about?). They begin to stir, go outside and notice the garden has returned! Are you guys ready for more “Watering the Garden with Jeff”? I’d watch that TV show, I’d even DVR it. Russ is exercising when he suddenly begins to taunt Jeff. Russ is saying Jeff shakes when he looks at him, says America only voted for Jeff because we feel sorry for him, etc. Jeff is ignoring him for the most part until Jordan comes out and reminds Jeff to keep his cool, then Russ starts taunting Jordan, and she returns it. She runs up and chest bumps Russ screaming “I am not scared of you”. Time for a reality check Jordan, MMA Fighter and a 140lb waitress, do the math blondie. Russ’ ranting continues, he calls Jordan fat, tells her to go eat some cookie dough, calls her Jeff’s pitbull, etc. Jeff has to tell Jordan to shut the f up, it’s not her fight. During the fight Jeff comments that Kevin is on his side… interesting. Nat tells Kevin if he keeps Russ she will stab him in the heart, she then pretend stabs him. BB needs to take the knives out of the house before someone loses a penis (and who wants to end up like Nat?) Jeff asks Russ if he wants to have sex, save it for BBAD boys. Jeff calls out to production that he is about to go hit Russ then he goes inside to calm down. Jordan is crying, Kev and Nat are in heaven. Natalie tells Michele that this is her fourth time being on the block, a house record, too bad she hasn’t taken the hint. The best thing to come out of the fight was Jeff apologizing for what he said about everyone’s families. This is the most violent house yet!
Russ and Jordan arguing in the backyard
Kevin looking to God for help | Russ doing the "Oh no you didn't girlfriend!"
Natalie tells Russ that Michele’s job was to always be a mole. Her job was to infiltrate the other side and take back information to J&J. What is this, Mission Impossible or Big Brother? Do they realize that Michele can’t remember anything? Russ tells her the sky is blue and by the time it gets back to J&J, the sky is falling! Russ tells Nat is he not going to spend his time being fake nice to them, he says “I’m gonna do me”… seems to me Jeff bent you over and did you already. Kevin says he thinks production hates him and Nat, he said that they never have anything negative to ask about Jeff. He says production is always asking, “How awesome is Jeff?” and “Wasn’t Jeff great in that comp?” Can you blame them? He's the bomb! Kev and Nat discuss Chima not being in the jury house and that if America votes in her place then they are screwed. Jeff breaks the monotony by coming out with the camera for HOH photos. He tells everyone to smile and act like they are happy, well everyone except Russ because he isn’t included in any of the photos. They all mess around and get a few good photos, Jordan strangling Russ’ wall photo, Jordan poses with Russ’ key at the front door, everyone jumps in the shower together, Jordan pretends to be on the toilet, Michele gets in the dryer, etc… I think the photo of Jordan on the toilet sums her up, all that girl ever talks about is bodily functions.
Its just one big happy family... for now.
It’s a lazy afternoon in the BB house. Housemates have been made aware there will be an inside lockdown tonight. They tell stories about shark attacks, mountain climbers who have to cut their limbs off, etc.. They need to inject some fun into the house, where’s Braden or Casey when you need them? Kevin is talking about comps and says that if there is another endurance comp that includes Jeff then he knows the show is fixed. J&J are in the HOH room where he is giving her a scolding for her shenanigans during the argument outside this morning. He tells her they have to have each others backs or one of them will be going home, and it won’t be her! Jordan starts crying again, Girl needs to get a grip. Jeff tries to comfort her but she pushes him away saying that she stinks. What is up with the bath stuff people?? Do you not realize you have nothing to do in there; hygiene should be a priority… after getting your enemy evicted of course! Kev, Mich, & Nat join J&J in the HOH, Jeff leaves to go to the DR and the rest discuss taxes, diet pills, used furniture, & college. Jeff returns and they all take their turn making trips to the DR to leave Russ goodbye messages. Jeff gets a little snippy with Michele and as soon as she realized she might fall out of his favor she starts kissing butt, laying on the bed, and of course the idiotic giggling at every sentence that comes out of Jeff’s mouth… if he’d whip it out right now, she’d &^#$^%... Natalie told Jordan that she and Michele would be her noms if she won, with Michele going home of course. Michele later tells Jordan that she doesn’t believe it, she thinks they would be stupid not to target Jeff. Jordan and Jeff don’t trust Nat and Kevin, well duh, not a lot they can do about it now. About the same time as this, Natalie is downstairs telling Russ they are going to nom Mich and Jeff with Jeff leaving. Kev and Nat are walking around counting things. Nat says someone took her gloves; she and Kev (with Russ as lookout) go through Jordan and Mich’s things looking for their gloves so Nat can wear them in an endurance comp… that girl is pint sized poison. Meanwhile Jordan and Jeff are in the HOH bed with the lights off kissing, snuggling and talking to Michele. It’s like déjà vu with Ronnie in the SS room. Do these people need an audience to kiss? Freaking Exhibitionists! Michele tries to slap Jeff’s butt in the dark when he goes to the bathroom in his underwear. Awkwaaard. We get FOTH then Michele conveniently comes downstairs and goes into the SS room and shuts the door, spoiling Nat’s plans. Apparently BB has told them to be asleep by 2am. Jordan and Jeff are alone in the HOH room… their last night in the big bed. They joke around and make out a little. Jeff comments that making out with Jordan is beautiful. Awwww
Mich has improved her looks since entering the house | Natalie digs for gold then wipes it on her shirt
Kevin and Natalie look through Mich's things
Good Morning Campers! Errr Houseguests! It’s an HOH lock-in. Jeff, Jordan and Natalie are in the HOH bed, Russ is at the foot of the bed in the floor, Michele is on the round chair and Kev is between the HOH bed and the wall. Jeff is listening to his Bob Marley CD. Mich is doing her usual sleep stuff, slinging arms and legs, moaning. Does her husband ever get any sleep? Its so quiet in the HOH that you can hear a pin drop, or a Jordan fart (Jeff: "Jordan, did you just fart?") And with that my shift comes to an end. Who will be evicted? (I think we already know the answer to that) What will Russ say in his eviction speech? Who will win HOH? Will Lydia jump Jessie’s bones the minute she arrives at the Jury House? Tune in Tonight…!!
My Favorite Daily Moments and Quotes:
Michele to Jordan: If I were a lesbian I would totally hook up with you, you’re hot.
Russ to Jordan: Sit there and eat your cookie dough and wonder why you’re fat? Oh No He Didn't??!!
Russ to anyone who will listen: One thinks Gucci is a catch phrase, the other thinks Technotronics is a word.
Jeff to Russ: Do you want to have sex with me? For real, do you have a crush on me, what’s your thing? ♫ ♪ key the music, Marvin Gaye "Lets get it on" ♫ ♪
Jordan says she hopes when Russ is walking down the street people call him a f*ggot, but she quickly apologizes for saying it… thinking about the cameras Jordy? America’s watching!
Discussing the fight with Russ
Jordan: You think I’ll look psycho on TV?
Jeff tries to snuggle Jordan
Jordan: No, I stink
Jeff: I don't care
Jordan: We are just friends
Jeff: No we aren't, we are lovers!
Jeff showing his abs to Russ: Get a good look boy, so you’ll have something to j*rk off to in the jury house. That was wrong on so many levels… yet so right.
Michele bought a used mattress and her dog peed on it and she returned it, successfully.
Jordan: I’m not fat, I’m thick. (To the English thick means stupid, ‘nuff said. hehe)
Kev & Jeff to Jordan: You are acting a lot dumber than you are.
Jordan: Thanks Guys!
Jeff: That is not a compliment.
Michele asks Jeff if he won POV and it was she and Jordan on the block, who would he use it on? Um.. Take a guess stinky?
Jordan: I think I kiss better after a couple of drinks cause I don’t think about it…
Jeff: Wanna open that wine?
Jeff: I’m doing what everyone does; I’m sitting up here bashing everyone. I hate the person I’m becoming.