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Thread: Big Brother 11 8/6 recap: The Rat Gets Cheesed!

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    what are you watching? iguanachocolate's Avatar
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    Big Brother 11 8/6 recap: The Rat Gets Cheesed!

    Hello dear readers! Tis I, iguanachocolate, here on this momentous occasion! What could it be, you ask? Why tonight is the night Ronnie the Rat is the closest to going home he has been in the entire game. Oh, how I long for the days when his little snout and beady eyes are not ruining the lovely picture quality of my giant hd tv. Send him back to whatever sewer he lied his way out of, probably by telling his fellow rats he was a championship cheese eater. Let’s get to it, shall we?

    First, we have the lovely Mrs. Chen in paying homage to the departed Casey in her Banana Man outfit. You aren’t the only one, Yellow-bot! Lydia is sporting the masked look today for some unknown reason. It’s kind of cool as it makes her eyes look really freaky with just the whites showing. Jordan tells us that Michele, Kevin, Jeff and she plan on voting Ronnie the Rat out and Lydia hopes he goes home because he has lied and manipulated everyone in the house.

    Jordan and Michele are sitting in the backyard talking about books and Russell comes out and begins to question them – he is certain they are plotting against him and goes into full on pararoid mode asking them what they were talking about. When they tell him ‘literature’ he believe them, and who could blame him? Why in the world would Jordan be talking about literature? He lures Michele up to the HoH room and she tells him of the plan a couple of weeks ago to backdoor him and how Chima had said not to trust him. I could swear she has already had this conversation with him, but perhaps the ‘roid use has shrunk his brain cells.

    Russell, of course, takes this to the resident Pinhead Jessie who spins his lies and tells him Chima never has let the demise of Russell cross her lips. Russell calls Chima up to the HoH room – Nat corners her on the way up and tells her to ‘play nice’ and keep the story as already lied. Chima demands that Michele come up to clear the air. “Michele, I need to talk to you upstairs, NOW!” Chima comes right out with it once back in the HoH and wants to know why Michele told Russell she wanted the lad out. Well, perhaps it is because you did, Chima? This leads to a full on shouting match with Chima flinging f -bombs and other assorted sailor speech right and left. Jordan calls her ‘sassy’. Chima vows to Michele and Nat that Russell wasn’t on the radar, but he is now.

    Ronnie is in full on desperation mode. He actually thinks Jordan would toss him a sympathy vote. Excuse, me, I must laugh hysterically now. He goes into the pool room totally oblivious that Jeff is ‘pulling the romance card’ on Jordan and they are kissing in one of the beds. Ronnie begins spinning even more lies, this time calling himself a ‘humble winner and a gracious lose’ and punctuates it with a fart. Yeah, classy. He tells him he is going to beg for a sympathy vote and I think Jeff is about a half second from telling Ronnie he’ll give him the dang vote if he would just take his noxious self out of the room!
    Julie asks Jordan what she was thinking when the fight between Chima and Russell was going on – Jordan says she was just trying to enjoy the shoe and stay clear. Michele tells us it’s tense in the house. Duh. Julie wants to know if the squid and squash help him get through his first week on slop ever? Jessie pretends he was brave and that it didn’t bother him. Dang, this show has so many laugh out loud moments this week!

    Russell and Julie have their private moment: Julie says Russell is in a great spot deal with everyone then won the HoH, but did the fight with Chima hurt him? Russell says yes, absolutely and that he said things he regretted and he apologized for it. How will he deal with the backlash? He says it will be tricky. Then he kisses up to Julie – an ode to Dan from last year, I am sure. Russell, you ain’t no Dan.

    Julie reminds him of that when she tells him that buttering up the host won’t get him anywhere. She wants to know who is Russ loyal to – Jeff or Jessie? Both –wants to see how far he can go before he has to decide between the two of them.

    Finally, we get the Coup D’Etat winner! He’s walking, walking, walking and yes! It’s Jeff! He is shocked, but thrilled. As the “Coop de ta?” (coupe d’etat a producer says helpfully) winner he has the power to use it for two weeks - he can overthrow the hoh and make his own noms – he can only use it once and has to use it in the next two evictions – he thanks America and says that obviously America sees what’s going on and wants to help. Yes, we do, Jeff-a-licious ! No other hamster can know they have the power – but Julie tells the houseguests that they know who they were and then invites the hg to use the power now – Jeff does not use it. Good move, Jeff!

    Final speeches – Lydia says everything is groovy and she hopes they vote her to stay.

    Ronnie, on the other hand, uses the moment to begin blubbering about how wonderful the experience was and then begins to spew hatred towards Michele, lambasting her for being a despicable human being and that she is the worst human being on the face of the planet. Dunno, Ronnie, but I can think of people a lot more despicable than Michelle. Like you, you lying rat fink.

    The vote – Kevin votes to evict Ronnie, Nat and Chima vote to evict Lydia. Jessie votes to evict Lydia. Michele votes to evict Ronnie – shocker! Jeff votes to evict Ronnie. Jordan votes to evict Ronnie and the rat goes home. Whooo hoooo! Ronnie, of course knew what was coming and he grins, hugs Lydia, says his goodbyes and slithers out the door as dramatically as a rat can. Scene!

    Julie wants to know why he went off on Michele – Ronnie says that she betrayed him and when Julie says could the same words be directed at him he says no, because he was loyal to his alliance – he’s an idiot. After the loving –not! - goodbye messages, Julie thanks Ronnie for being a lover of the game, but her expression pretty much says ‘even though you suck at it’.

    Now, the all important HoH comp – In a flashback, Kevin punches a button in the back yard that starts a whole bunch of messages from America - “ Hey houseguests – this is Bridget from Honolulu and here’s my advice to you: Stop sleeping so much! You spend all day lying to each other, we don’t need you lying in bed, too!”, “Attention houseguests, those who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones, they should eat tuna!”, and a song, “We’re Big Brother friends for life, when we get in a fight we gonna kiss and make up because we’re Big Brother friends for life.” “500 g’s are on the line, one wrong move and you ain’t getting’a dime.” “Hey houseguests, look to the person on your left, now look to the person on your right, they are both liars.” Pretty much the hg’s are laughing at the quips from the fans. Some of them they should really take to heart, though, you know what I’m saying?

    The comp concerns these messages. “Say What?” Julie will read quotes and the hamsters must determine if they are true or false. Lydia and Michele are out first. Then Jessie is out. Jordan and Jeff follow him. Next question Chima wins! Yeah! This leaves a wide open field for Jeff and whoever he wants to target. Please oh please, BB Gods, let him target Jessie and Nat!

    I wonder how Chima will react to having all her power stripped away when if Jeff vetoes her noms?? You know it’s gonna be good! Stay tuned for Sundays superfluous nomination show and then to see who wins the all important safety tool for this week – the Power of Veto on Tuesday. See you then!
    A good book should leave you... slightly exhausted at the end. You live several lives while reading it. ~William Styron, interview, Writers at Work, 1958

  2. #2
    Yoffy lifts a finger... fluff's Avatar
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    Re: Big Brother 11 8/6 recap: The Rat Gets Cheesed!

    Quote Originally Posted by iguanachocolate;3649357;
    First, we have the lovely Mrs. Chen in paying homage to the departed Casey in her Banana Man outfit.

    Why in the world would Jordan be talking about literature?

    Ronnie begins spinning even more lies, this time calling himself a ‘humble winner and a gracious lose’ and punctuates it with a fart. Yeah, classy.

    After the loving –not! - goodbye messages, Julie thanks Ronnie for being a lover of the game, but her expression pretty much says ‘even though you suck at it’.
    Good job, ic.

    I don't care how pregnant Julie is, there was no excuse for that yellow outfit.
    "That's Numberwang!"

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