**This recap covers events from noon Saturday to noon Sunday, BB time**
You know, I’ve found it quite hard to focus my attention on the feeds lately. I’m obsessed with watching the Olympics. When I’m not watching the Olympics, I’m talking about the Olympics. I have the biggest crush on Michael Phelps and would much rather see him swim in a Speedo than say, oh, Jerry. But, never fear dedicated readers. I have torn myself away from the TV long enough to check out what these lame lumps of boredom in California have been up to for the past 24 hours. As you may have guessed, it wasn’t nearly exciting as what’s going on in Beijing. Let’s dive right in, shall we?
As my shift begins, Michelle, Renny, Dan, and Keesha are in the HoH chatting about how important the POV is when the numbers start to dwindle. They wonder who Jerry would put up if he were to win HoH next week. With that statement I gather everyone is planning on keeping him this week. Darn. Wait, that means April would be evicted. Hooray! Dan thinks Jerry would put up Dan and Memphis. BB calls for an outside lockdown and Michelle thinks “something’s up”. After an hour of fish and trivia, we come back to find that the large dining room table has been replaced with a smaller one. Does that mean this season is almost over?
With all these things to suck, April doesn’t know what to do!
Keesha and Memphis lay out together in the backyard and they comment that Jerry was really close to winning the veto for a third time. Memphis wonders if he should talk to Michelle just to make sure she plans on voting April out. Keesha says that Michelle assured her she would vote with the house and if the house wants April out, she will vote April out. God forbid anyone actually grow a mind of their own in the house. MFWalkoff suggested that maybe the 14th picture frame on the memory wall could be for April’s now defunct bun in the oven. I think it might be for a picture of the house, since everyone thinks how this “house” wants them to think. Apparently Michelle has claimed that if she were to win HoH next week, she’d nominate Jerry and Ollie. Memphis and Keesha call BS on that one. They think the worst scenario for next week would be for Ollie to win HoH.
In the bedroom, April and Ollie canoodle and she tells Ollie that everyone would be stupid not to vote her out while they have the chance. She tells her manwhore that if she leaves, he can’t let everyone talk about her like they do about Libra. Something tells me he might be leading that discussion, honey. In the backyard, Memphis and Michelle have now joined together and Memphis says he likes being close to Dan but he still doesn’t trust him. They laugh that they are a lot closer than everyone else thinks they are. Up in the HoH, Renny and Keesha wonder if Michelle and Memphis are in an alliance, even though Michelle told Keesha she didn’t have any promises with anyone. They think Michelle plays dumb (uhh… plays?) a lot but they think she really knows everything that is going on. They are worried that if April stays in the house, Michelle will latch onto her. Renny thinks that she and Keesha are always going to be targets because they are so nice. If by “nice” you really mean “crazy”, then yes I agree. Conspiracy theories abound, which basically put Memphis and Michelle into some crazy alliance with everyone in the house. The girls chat for awhile about everyone in the house. Their conversations range from how Renny likes Dan to Memphis’s shifty ways.
They look like twins, don’t they folks?
Keesha leaves the HoH and Dan heads up to talk to Renny. He is wearing the veto around his neck, claiming that the producers told him to do it. Dan asks Renny if she made a deal with Ollie and she says she didn’t. They talk about different scenarios and they both agree that nominations should stay the same. In the back of my mind, I secretly hope that Dan and Renny would join forces and take down everyone else. They would be a power alliance I wouldn’t mind at all. Dan tells her he will let her know if anyone asks him about using the veto on them. He leaves and all is peachy in Renny land.
The rest of the afternoon passes like any other normal afternoon in the BB house: slowly and painfully. Dan asks Michelle if she’d do a “Reality Boxing” match against Libra and she said she says she would wear her red unitard. The boxing talk continues for way too long. Could you imagine Michelle in her red unitard beating that fake smile off of Libra’s face? Add in a Cappy vs. Amber match and I would definitely buy that on Pay Per View! Memphis mixes drinks (but remember, he’s a Mixologist, not a Bartender!), Renny cooks, and some of the hamsters nap. *yawn* Skippy must have the B Team on duty today, because they keep giving us all 4 feeds full of boring crap. Like I need to see all 4 cameras on Dan washing his hands in the bathroom. Someday I hope to see just 1 feed on Jerry washing his hands in the bathroom, but we all know that won’t happen. Wow, this day sucks. Michelle and Ollie play pool in the backyard and ponder about the conditions at the jury house. They bash Libra and it’s obvious Michelle is still bitter about the Hawaii trip. Libra isn’t in the house anymore, pleeeeeeeeeeease stop talking about her!
Sorry Jerry. That “if I cover my eyes, they can’t see me” thing only works when you are in Kindergarten.
April makes her way outside and joins Ollie near the hot tub. April tells Ollie that Renny won’t let Dan use the HoH bathroom. Oh no, Renny must be America’s Player!! April thinks she is up on the block because of all the things she has won, and not because she has done anything to anyone. Me thinks she doesn’t have time to do anything to anyone because she is always doing a little sumpin sumpin to Ollie. April says she will be shocked if Michelle doesn’t vote to keep her. Ollie thinks that they’ve done a lot for Dan and he should show his gratitude by voting to keep April. Riiiiiight. April tells Ollie to keep playing the game if she’s evicted. When did he start? He says that nobody sees him as a threat and before everyone knows it, he’ll be in the final 4. April goes inside to change into her bikini and comes back out. Ollie asks April if she is going to wear one of her new designer outfits to the wrap party. She says they are nice but not really her taste. She then tells Ollie about her surgery “down there”. Lovely. She apparently had internal damage from holding her pee for so long. She also tells Ollie that when she was 21, she got married, but then got it annulled.
I think in my head that the houseguests need some alcohol to liven them up, and BB apparently picks up what I’m putting down. The hamsters get beer and wine! There are 2 bottles of wine and 4 beers. Wow, 4 whole beers. Come on, Big Brother, that’s pretty lame. Keesha dives right in to the wine. There’s a surprise. April and Keesha bond and say that Libra tore them apart because she was jealous. Oh please. I’m 100% natural blonde, and I love being blonde, but these two stupid bitches give blondes everywhere a terrible name. They have maybe 12 brain cells between the two of them. They squawk a mile a minute about all the trouble Libra caused. Memphis doesn’t like the fact that Libra isn’t in the house anymore and the girls are still bashing her. He goes outside and screams that he is bored. Michelle, April, and Keesha are really downing the wine. Michelle tells BB she wants more wine or she’s going to sleep. Ollie is in the kitchen trying to fry up some slop. Michelle, Memphis, and Jerry head out to the backyard and Jerry tries to look at the stars. The alcohol starts to hit Renny, and she starts to do impressions of the houseguests. She is such a goofball. She tells Dan he acts all innocent but she knows he is really a ho. Like I said before: Dan/Renny = Power Alliance.
While most of the hamsters are inside laughing and talking about their high school days, April lays outside in the hammock all by her lonesome and cries. I almost feel bad for her. Almost. She falls asleep until Ollie comes out and startles her. She cries to him about being on the block. She says that everyone is saying bad things about her. Michelle comes out and asks April what’s wrong, and April says sometimes people in this house forget she has feelings. Yes folks, there is a heart under those giant *real* boobs.
*sniffle* All this time in the house and all I got were some ugly designer clothes and a pregnancy scare. *sniffle*
Dan and Keesha rendezvous in the spa room and Dan tells Keesha he asked Renny who she’d put up if he took Jerry off. Keesha is glad Dan mentioned it to her because Renny told her about it too. They both think Michelle and Ollie have an alliance and are trying to find ways to keep April in the house. They laugh and say it isn’t going to happen. Later, in the hippie room, Renny tells Keesha she didn’t make any deals with Ollie to keep him off the block and Keesha tells Renny the only thing Dan told her about his conversation with Renny was that he doesn’t plan on using the veto. Tsk tsk, these girls are fibbing.
Elsewhere, Michelle, Memphis, and Dan hope that Jerry will be on the block next week since they are certain he’s staying this week. They think anyone at this point would put Jerry on the block except for Ollie. April and Ollie are cuddling on the other camera, but I don’t want to watch that garbage. Dan hopes the next HoH competition is an endurance, but one that is fair to everyone. Michelle says that neither April or Jerry has asked for her vote yet. She tells Memphis and Dan goodnight and heads to bed. Dan asks Memphis how hard they should try for HoH this time around and Memphis says they want Keesha to win, but it’s probably a good week for one of them to win. They think if either Keesha or Michelle win, they are both safe. The guys then head to bed. I take back the Renny/Dan = Power Alliance comment and now update it to reflect the fact that I want Memphis in their alliance. Memphis/Renny/Dan = Power Alliance.
*hiccup* I drunk I’m not swear. *hiccup*
Dan, Memphis, and Keesha all begin to laugh in their bedroom because they realize they are all awake. Dan throws a pillow at Keesha and she giggles. He then jumps on her and grabs her foot. He takes the pillow and throws it at Memphis and leaves to go to the bathroom. While Dan is in the bathroom, Memphis tries to come up with a way to scare Dan. He decides to take the mattress off of the bed. Dan turns the lights on and yells at Keesha and Memphis. They all laugh. Memphis helps Dan put the mattress back on. Dan turns the light off and stands in the middle of the room holding a pillow. Keesha yells and they all laugh again. Finally, these children settle down from their summer camp prank war and fall asleep.
Big Brother lets the houseguests sleep in until about 10am. They mill about the kitchen giving their usual groggy good mornings. Dan hides under the coffee table in the living room, trying to scare people as they walk by. This guy gets crazier by the day. Michelle tells anyone who will listen that she found her missing ring in her drawer. It looks like Renny is going to give Dan a haircut (finally!), but he wants to say a prayer first. He prays that this haircut will be Renny’s finest hour and that she will have the patience to deal with him.
Renny: If you don’t shut up, I’m going to scalp the crap out of you!
As my shift ends, Renny is finishing up Dan’s haircut. Apparently the day is going to be full of Renny haircuts. Woo hoo. I was hoping I’d get the Veto Ceremony during my shift, but no such luck. You’ll have to check out waywyrd’s recap tomorrow for all of those delicious details.
Thanks to JustJuls and Just Sayin for the screencaps. You gals rock!
Do you wish Dan’s Swim Club was an Olympic event? PM me.