Welcome back my Big Brother lovelies. Itís been a while for me. I opted to not really watch the winter skankfest know as Big Brother so Iím ready to go this season. We have quite the crew before us, it reminds me of that old Real Word skit on Saturday Night Live. My name is Steven, I hate black people. My name is Brian, I like to use old people. My name is Jerry, Iím not sure about gay cowboys. And the cycle continues. My name is Yardgnome, I hate stupid, ignorant people who drive slow. I guess Iím going to hate this season of Big Brother. Although, I canít confirm if any of these people drive slow but I think we can all assume Jerry does. So letís sit back, have some cocktails, and watch this batch of clueless people make asses of themselves.
Wrath of the Nominated
We kick tonight off with a little recap of the nomination ceremony. Renny and Jessie were nominated because of a disagreement they had the night before, something about someone waking the other person up. You know, stuff that
kidsadults fight over. Brian is just gloating that he got exactly what he wanted. He can barely fit his head into the confession room because it has grown so big. His arm is also sore from all the back patting he has been giving himself.
Renny and Jessie walk around and start making snide little comments to each other. The house tries to comfort each person a little, but like me, they just donít seem to care about either one. Jerry tries to explain to Jessie why he got nominated, I think itís because Jessieís guns are bigger than his. Old man has got big guns thoughÖfor an old man. Seriously, who let this freakiní old man on the show?
What we finally have been waiting for, a fight. Renny and Jessie start ďtalkingĒ to each other. Renny wants to talk about the incident but Jessie is having none of that. He walks out and proves that he is 10 years old. I have no respect for that.
Drinking Always Makes the Party Fun
Meanwhile, Brian, Ollie, and Dan cheers over what a great job that Brian has done. Next they will probably come up with some hare-brained idea about how they are going to be the final three, and that one of them needs to keep winning the HOH over the next couple of weeks, followed up with a clever name like the Three Horsemen. Out in the kitchen, Renny begs Jerry to open the wine, because she needs some more wine to go with her whine. Jerry invites everyone up to his room for drinks and bad decisions.
Renny asks Jerry if itís okay if she says something in his room. He gives her the approval and she apologizes to Jessie for waking him up. The fact that this is still going on is just ridiculous. Renny calls him a liar and like, seriously, walks out of the room. He tells everyone this was the first time she apologized, the show clips back to the incident and shows her apologizing. Zam, that showed him! She then tells him he has a forked tongue; Iím kind of grossed out but would still like to see it.
Michelle, Ollie, and Brian gather outside and Brian talks them into voting Jessie out. He tells them that Renny will self-destruct on her own later and they need to get out a strong person. He then tries to work the rest of the crowd with his fast-talking. No one seems to trust his slimey ways. Iím only going to say this once Brian, YOU ARE NOT DR. WIL! He is trying too hard this early in the game.
His next victim of fast talking is, Memphis, he tries to get into a quasi-alliance with him and Memphis doesnít seem to buy it. Brian gets mad, that he is kind of blown off, and will get his revenge. Brian seems to think he is running this game and will be making all the decisions. I really dislike this guy already; itís time for him to go. Then I can laugh and make jokes about who is really running the game.
Veto Time- Sweet Dreams Honey
Ollie and April start talking, flirting, and hanging out. They both claim to have some sort of connection. I donít really see it lasting very long. After this short montage, Jerry yells for everyone to gather, itís time to pick players for the veto. Jerry picks first and Memphis will be playing. Renny is next and draws Michelleís name out of the bag. Jessie is last and April is the name he selects. Jerry chooses Angie as the host of the competition. Everyone heads off to the storage room to get dressed.
They all come outside in pajamas. There is a big pit of pillows and a pool of some sort of glop. It looks thick and yellow and not really pleasant. The contestants have to dig through the big bed for pillows that match their pjs. Then they rip the pillows apart and some of them have veto bears. They take the veto bears and dive into the pool of honey, and fill their jars. The first person to fill six jars wins the competition. The first person to catch VD from the honey, gets a prize later.
Everyone dives into the honey to get to the bed. I wonder if silicone floats in honey. Jesse is working the pillows like a madman. Renny can barely make it out of the honey. Jerry is covered in feathers but heís probably used to that, he was around during the tar and feathering days, right? Jerry and Michelle take an early lead in the competition. Renny looks like she is wearing a chicken suit, she has so many feathers on her. Jessie finally pulls ahead and takes the competition, winning the veto.
Great, the competition took about twenty minutes of the show. The next twenty minutes should be footage of the contestants trying to shower globs of honey off their bodies while the feathers clog up the drain.
Playing the Game or Getting Played?
Brian and Dan are talking about the competition and Brian seems to think that Memphis did too well. Brian tells Dan that he will take care of getting rid of him. He quickly runs upstairs to get up in Jerryís business. He tells him he is too strong. Jerry agrees with him and practices his speech on Brian. Itís really cute. Jerry is a cute old man, too sweet and innocent for this show.
Ollie is hanging with the girls and Dan walks in and tells them that Memphis is going to go. They all seem shocked by the news. Libra is having none of that and gets mad and starts to rally the girls. Itís about time someone else started playing the game besides Brian. The rest of the girls gather in a tiny sauna type thing, men across America are drooling at the thought of them, in barely anything, and sweating. That doesnít happen, they instead talk about what a threat Brian is too them. The girls finally catch on that Dan, Ollie and Brian might be in an alliance and they might be eliminated next. They confront Ollie and he denies it.
Ollie pulls Libra and April aside and tells them he had an alliance with them on day one but he is not playing them. I think Ollie loves the ladies and it might get him far this season. I would also like to add, Ollie looks very good with his shirt off. That really has nothing to do with the show but I need something to keep me interested.
Ollie goes to Memphis and tells him Brianís plan. He gets upset and tells Jessie. No one can keep a secret in this house. Itís all about continual talking. The hamsters all claim to be so tired from all the game playing. I can only imagine that laying around all day, talking, eating, lying around some more, and some more talking is completely exhausting. Ollie, Libra, and April make a plan to get everyone together and tell Jerry to put Brian up on the block.
Brian, Dan, Steven and Jerry are hanging outside when April comes out and tells Jerry she wants to use his bathroom. He comes in and finds everyone else waiting outside his door. Ollie tells Jerry about all the scheming that Brian has been doing. Jerry seems a bit resistant at first which is not a great idea when the majority is in the room. They promise him immunity for the next couple of weeks but he doesnít really believe them. Oh, poor, cute Jerry. They should all talk slow and let him take a nap so he does not get too weakened by the whole situation. He is freaking old after all.
Jessie has the veto, so itís time for him to decide if heís going to use it. Jerry is stressing out and not wearing any military wear because he is going back on his word and he feels bad about it. Seriously, this man is too sweet and old to be on this show. The ceremony starts and Jessie letís Renny tell the group why he should use the veto on her. Renny says that she doesnít expect him to use it on her and she is correct. He goes off the block and Jerry nominates Brian. While Jerry is giving his speech, you can see Brain start to panic and his eyes swinging from side to side. One of the most awesome moments ever!
Make sure to tune in Wednesday to see who gets evicted. If there is any justice in the world, Brian will be gone! If you are like me and donít really want to watch the show, catch MsFroggyís recap, I guarantee it will be better than the show.