This recap covers events from noon Friday to noon Saturday, BB time
I turn on my feeds to find Jen, Kail, Jessica, and Amber on the backyard couch. The Nerd Herd v. 2.0 is in the corner behind the hammock STILL trying to figure out the mystery votes from the past two weeks. King Dick and his minions are hashing and rehashing different scenarios. Dick thinks that something is up and it’s making him very uneasy. I know what’s up Dick - the size of your ego. Jameka says that they will never know who cast the votes until they get out of the house. Eric keeps blabbing on and on, trying to dig himself out of the hole caused by Thursday night’s banner plane. Eric’s demise is brought to you by the lovely twist we like to call “America’s Player”. Dick tells Eric he hates when Eric doesn’t listen to him. Dick claims that it’s his ass that’s on the line, not anybody else’s. Eric agrees. At this point, I think Dick could say the sky is green and Eric would agree. Eric apologizes for being so vocal about wanting Nick out of the house. He feels like he offended King Dick. Dick says it’s okay. Jameka is going on and on about how she thinks it was two different people casting the mystery votes. I don’t think I’ve heard one “mmm hmmm” out of her mouth in the past five minutes. I’d call that some real divine intervention.
Hi. My name is Dick and I’m a poweraholic.
I get a little bored of these chumps so I switch to the folks on the backyard couch. Dustin left the secret corner meeting to join this group. He is drinking a protein shake. Jen thinks it’s funny that three cameras are on them and they aren’t talking about anything important. Dustin said the little meeting was too funny. He said everyone was flipping out. Jessica just told everyone that Zach has had ringworm for three weeks. Wait… WHAT?! She said it is so disgusting and he needs to go to the DR and get medicine. Dustin said BB will throw them in a hotel for a few days. Dick and Eric come over from their meeting and Dick says no way, it would compromise the whole game. Jessica says that is so unclean. She says that she and Zach were just sitting around and he looked down at his leg and said, “I have ringworm.” She asked him if he said anything to BB and he told her no and that he thought it would just go away. Zach sure isn’t the brightest crayon in the box. Jessica said Zach uses Jameka’s Vaseline and she needs to know. Dustin said not to tell her or she’ll hit someone. The same Vaseline that Jameka uses on her face, Zach puts on his ringwormed legs. Ugghh! That is so foul.
This little piggy went to market…
Outside lockdown is over and a few of the hamsters head inside. Dick, Amber, Daniele, and Jameka stay on the couch. Dick and Amber tell Jameka about the Vaseline. Amber tells her to throw it away. Jameka thinks that is disgusting. Amber thinks Zach got ringworm from never washing his hands. Jameka said he was rubbing the ringworm on his leg then touching things in the kitchen. Dick complains about how gross Zach is. I see Zach in the kitchen so I switch to him, hoping to hear some ringworm talk. Instead, I am forced to watch him shovel his face full of leftover pizza. Boy, the women sure will be swooning for Zach after this season!
Hey ladies. How you doin’?
Eric and Jen are in the living room. Eric screams to Jessica in the other room and asks if she is part of a second twist where they put someone who is retarded in the house. I think to myself, Eric just said a “second twist” when the houseguests have no idea there is a “first twist”. Of course, they have a combined IQ of -40, so nobody notices his little slip up. (ETA: I guess my IQ has dropped this season as well, because a day after I wrote this recap, I realized the "first twist" could be considered the rivals in the house. Eric is the "second twist". Duh.) Jessica tells Eric that he’s a Jewseph. He looks more like a Joseph than a Jew. This made me laugh really hard because Jessica sounded like a chipmunk when she said it. Zach gets called to the DR and Jen says that the medic must have arrived. Eric says instead of putting “Nominations Today” on the screen, there was some crazy stuff on there. Jess yells to him from the other room and they playfully banter and sing back and forth. Eric asks BB to get Jessica’s handler out there because she’s out of control. They both chuckle. Jessica told him if he was on her Myspace, he would be taken out of her Top 20. He said he doesn’t have Myspace. Jessica responds with, “Oh my God, how old are you!?” He says he’s going to move to Kansas and get an apartment with her. She says she’ll get him a job at Dairy Queen with all the high school kids. He asks if there are hot high school girls working at DQ. Yep, that’s America’s Player!
Zach comes out of the DR and says he saw a nurse and he doesn’t have ringworm. The nurse said it’s something he got from the shower. Jessica says if anyone else in the house gets ringworm that nurse better be fired. Eric, Dustin, and Jen decide to lay out. Jen has one foot in the pool and forgot she still has her microphone on. I half expect a bolt of electricity to shoot through her body and Jameka to come running out shouting her prayers were answered, but no such luck. She also has a blindfold on her head. She says she’s forgetful today. Eric is telling Dustin about how Dick is trying to use Jessica to get to him. Eric is sick of Dick telling everyone what to do. Dustin says if he wins HoH next week, he is putting Dick up against Daniele. He said they need to be broken up. Eric thinks Dick is trying to get Jess as a swing vote because if she doesn’t trust Eric, she won’t vote how Eric wants. Dustin wonders how Dick can think they are all so stupid and where he gets off thinking he has all the power. Eric says they can’t tell Dick any of that because he will flip the f*** out. Eric doesn’t care for Dick as a person anymore. Eric calls him paranoid and psychotic. Dustin says Dick is the new Joe. Dustin says that Nick has only been gone for twelve hours so Dick can’t claim it was a mistake to vote him out. They talk a little about the HoH competition. Amber and Jameka were the first ones out, followed by Eric. Eric said he lasted about ten minutes. My guess is that Eric is more of a two minute man. I digress.
Kail and Jen are in the bathroom chatting. Jen says they are all fighting because of the two votes for Kail to leave. Jen says it was Zach and someone. Jen thinks it’s Amber. Kail didn’t know that’s what the LNC was fighting about. She thinks Daniele and Evel voted for her to leave. Someone buy this woman a clue! Jessica says there are no banners today and Jen said it’s because Nick is gone.
Nobody likes me. Everybody hates me. Guess I’ll go spread ringworm.
Jen heads up to the HoH room to chat with Daniele. Daniele says she is nothing like her dad. She said everyone is waiting for her to act like him, but he has shown her what she doesn’t want to be like. She goes on to explain to Jen about how her parents split up but she had nothing to do with it. Jen tells Daniele that Dick is the one who told her about Daniele’s boyfriend being engaged before and Jen couldn’t believe he was telling her such personal information about his daughter. Jen thinks everyone at home is probably wondering why Daniele and Jen don’t talk. I wasn’t. I was actually just wondering when my dinner was going to be ready. Jen says she hasn’t said anything about Daniele and Daniele said she has just not to her face. Jen realizes she is probably going to get nominated but she just doesn’t want to leave the house with negative feelings between them. Daniele is whining about how she lost her best friend in the house and nobody understands. She says she never expected to find a best friend, but Nick really was a best friend. He was genuine and nice. She says losing Nick was harder than realizing her Dad was going to be in the house with her. Jen said she hung out with Nick the first few days in the house but she didn’t want to be the girl who hooks up on reality TV so she decided to back off of him then things got awkward. If Jen is such good friends with Boogie, he must have missed the chapter of BB preparation about the benefits of showmances. Daniele asks her about the POV last week. Jen says she knew if she buzzed in and got it right, she won, but if she got it wrong, she was going to win through Jameka. Daniele asks Jen a question and says that her answer could affect who goes home this week. Daniele asks who Jen voted for to stay this week. Jen says Kail. Daniele says someone in the house is lying and she thinks she knows who. More Nick talk. Jen says that she, Zach, and Kail realize they are the outsiders. Daniele tells Jen there are things she wants to talk to Jen about after nominations. Jen said she doesn’t care if she gets backdoored because she doesn’t care if she’s there. She says it’s like fun and stuff but like she doesn’t care if she like gets voted out.
Jen heads outside to the couch with Dick and Zach. Jen tells them she was making sure she was still going to be nominated because she heard she wasn’t. She thinks it will be cool if the same two people are nominated three weeks in a row. Dick tells her that she’s such an f’in idiot and goes off on her again. Dick says that there are probably 10,000 people online who have their icon as Dick dumping iced tea on Jen’s head. Jen says everything is all about him. Dick goes off on her again calling her some very nasty names. Hey Dick, Hitler called. He wants his personality back. Jen sits in silence with her blindfold on then gets up to leave. Dick tells Amber that Nick supported Dick, Daniele, and Amber. Dick wants to kill himself for voting Nick out. He says he will never again sacrifice for the group. Amber says she knows they made a mistake. Dick said he hates Jen and she has to go this week. Dick tells Amber she is kidding herself if she doesn’t think the others in the LNC will put her up. Dick says Jen will go this week, Kail next week, and Eric after that. He says that Eric has been playing everyone and he’s a manipulator. Amber cries around that they never should have left Nick go. Amber’s family better think of investing in some stock from the Kleenex Corporation, and that’s that.
How would you like to wake up next to this every morning?
The Nerd Herd v. 2.0 has a meeting in the HoH because nominations are quickly approaching. Daniele is straightening her hair. Dustin asks Daniele what the plan is. She says that she went along with what the house wanted to do last week so she hopes they will do the same thing for her this week. She is going to nominate Jen and Kail. She wants Jen gone. Eric says Jen is in there for her fifteen minutes of fame. Dani says that if Jen or Kail wins veto, Zach goes up but one of the women goes home. Dick says it is what it is. There’s an original saying. Dustin plans on standing and clapping after the nomination ceremony. Daniele says that after this week, they will all be in sequester. The group cheers. Hey, I think I see Maggie and Ivette. Oh wait, sorry, wrong Nerd Herd.
Dick’s hand rests on his umm… yeah.
We are treated to vortex for a little while, and when we come back, Kail and Jen are nominated! Surprise! It looks like the third time is a charm for this terrible twosome. I am so bored with these “safe” nominations. Let’s get some drama churning in the house! Kail goes directly into stealth mode, telling Dustin that if he gets to compete for POV and wins, he should take Jen off and have Daniele put up Zach against her since Daniele already promised Kail’s safety. Dustin assures her that she is safe but she wants to know Jen is safe too. Dustin says he has no idea what will happen.
Another lengthy vortex comes and goes and we find out that the houseguests have picked balls for the POV competition. The players will be Daniele, Jen, Kail, Zach, Jameka, and Dustin. Amber was chosen to host. She feels bad because she wants Dick to host. Daniele talks about the letter she got from home. Her friend’s mom told her it’s weird to see her on TV. Her boyfriend misses her and he’s taking care of her bills. She said everyone wrote something nice and encouraging. I bet you can’t guess Jameka’s response!
BB gives the houseguests giant croquet mallets with a big ball to hit around in the backyard. There was a note saying that this would be part of a future competition. Zach, Daniele, and Jen start practicing right away. Jessica and Eric wash dishes in the kitchen and talk a little strategy. I can’t hear half of what they are saying due to the running water. Eric says that Amber likes him. Jessica says she has trusted Eric from Day One and that Eric is doing a good job. She says Evel and Daniele will just screw her over. He says that if he goes to sequester early, he will be the rudest f***** there until Jessica comes then he’ll kiss her under the covers. You know that dinner I was waiting on earlier? Yeah, it just came up in my mouth a little bit.
Here Dicky Dicky Dicky!
The evening winds down with more strategy talk. Waaamber and Jameka Christ Superstar (thanks to the members of FORT for those clever names) are chatting and starting to realize that maybe Dick and Daniele are right about Eric’s lying ways. Jameka knows that God doesn’t want Dick or Daniele to win. Dustin wants the final five to be himself, Amber, Jessica, Eric, and Jameka. He knows they have to work to get Dick and his waif daughter out of the house. Dustin didn’t call her waif, but I felt it was an appropriate adjective. Random chatter continues, then all the hamsters go to bed.
BB wakes the houseguests up around 9am with an announcement that it’s time to get up and the veto competition will start in two hours. Dick yells f*** and everyone else just tosses and turns. Dick and Dustin get up and head to the kitchen. Dick says that seeing Jen in the morning is not a pretty sight. Dustin talks about his bowel movements. One was even a “clogger”. Way to make your mother proud, Dustin! Daniele is in the HoH tub shaving various parts of her body. I feel a little bit skeezy watching that, so I stay on the kitchen. Kail looks a bit rough this morning. Dustin says today is going to be a tough day because he didn’t sleep well last night. He said BB is giving them repeat songs in the morning. Dustin and Kail go into the workout room for a short chat. Dustin tells her not to trust Dick and Daniele and to trust him. Kail follows Dustin into the bathroom and she asks how Daniele could do that and Dustin tells her the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. I wish these people would clarify their statements because I have no idea what “that” refers to. Naughty Skippy cutting in on the middle of conversations!
Dick heads up to the HoH for a last minute chat with Daniele before the veto competition begins. He said he wants Kail gone this week because she is the brains of the Kail/Jen pairing. Daniele says she gave Kail her word. Daniele wants Eric out. Dick warns her that she doesn’t know how the group would vote if Eric went on the block. Dani whines.
As my shift comes to an end, the veto competition still hasn’t started. If you want to know who wins the veto, check out our State of Play thread.
Thanks to Snapit for the great Kail and Jen screencaps!