*This recap covers from noon Thursday to noon Friday
Let me reminisce for a moment...it's been almost 2 months since I was messing with the feeds, and heard that audio leak of our 14 houseguests. It was the 4th of July, the day we celebrate our independence, but I haven't had a moment's independence since then. Why? Because I've spent the whole summer glued to the feeds, and to prove it, I'm as pale as Dr. Evil himself. So as the summer and Big Brother almost wind to an end, let me begin what is my last Big Brother live feed recap of the season. It's a bittersweet moment for me, people! Hamster withdrawal is not a pretty sight, but I'll recuperate by the fall line-up.
Boogie discovers the time-old tradition of laying in the floor to look up the dresses of passing females.
Day 3,987 in the Big Brother house, and our six remaining houseguests are very calm. Danielle, Will, Janelle, Erika and Boogie play cards in the living room while George tries to pack his massive amount of crazy outfits. The most (non) interesting topic is the fact that Boogie has pleasured himself so much in his bed that if you took a black light to see the remains, it would look like a Jackson Pollock painting. And let's all say a big huge EWW to that! Together now! "Ewwwww!"
The creature regenerates itself.
Now, for a final look at our two soon-to-be evicted houseguests, and what entertainment they've provided.
Danielle, quiet, demure Danielle. What would this season had of been without her? A lot more sober, that's what! What fun we've had with her drunken rants, stalker-like doorbell ringing, and crazed semi-hidden smoking. Danielle started off strong, gunning for Janelle, and along the way found her "Legion of Doom" and lots and lots of wine. I've never seen a houseguest able to incessantly talk about themselves in quite the way she can.
Danielle wonders why she can't leave in the same manner she played the game...drunk.
George, loveable teddy bear George. Wait! Don't squeeze him! He expels noxious fumes easily enough without that. George has been the not-so-great house cook, the house maid, and the worst-dressed houseguest of all time. His laugh drove me crazy on the feeds, and though I'm sure he's a nice guy, I am thankful that I won't have to listen to him anymore. His slop-eating was impressive, and we all wish him well.
The Grinch's long-lost cousin is such an embarrassment that Dr. Seuss burned those chapters.
Okay okay, you all are saying, "enough with the trip down memory lane, what the heck happened in the HOUSE?" Well, the two above houseguests left on my shift, and as the feeds come live after the show, we are left with our final four. Will, Boogie, Erika and Janelle, to duke it out for the $500,000 prize. Did ANYONE doubt Chilltown would still be there? Nah, me neither.
Erika, torn between the lure of Boogie's restaurant-owning self, and any scrap of dignity she may still possess.
Janelle is still our HOH even though the nominations and eviction has already happened. Everyone mills about, freaking out about how fast the show moved. Collectively they figure out that the show must be ending sooner than they originally thought, and muse about it being because of NFL or the new fall line-up. Will hurt his thumb pretty badly during the veto competition, and Janelle broke a nail. They get sushi for dinner, and Janelle has her HOH basket waiting in the storage room, even though she'll get no HOH room this time around. Everyone eats, and Will makes a toast that he loves the players but hates the game. Somehow I think this is yet another one of his lies, because he loves attention, and the possibility of winninng loads of cash. The ever-lovely Boogie blows his nose loudly at the dinner table, then lays the used tissue right there on the table. He is such a vile, disgusting troll-man. After a while it's time for the next HOH competition, and we get flames yet again.
Boogie, quite the expert in nasal cavity exploration, tries a double-entry technique.
Back from flames, and the houseguests are wearing referee or umpire outfits. Boogie is the new HOH, and he's stunned by the fact that he's going to most likely have to nominate his "showmance" Erika. He knows that if Janelle wins the power of veto either Erika or Will must go home, and most likely that'll be Erika. IF Janelle wins it. He's also freaking out because his showmance is making him uncomfortable, and Erika strangely seems really into him. You'd think that a guy as hideous as Mike Boogie would be thrilled for any female attention, but he's not liking it so much. Boogie goes and sits in the red room alone, and looks almost teary-eyed, and in shock. He whispers to himself "I can't believe this." Yeah, neither can I. Ugh.
Janelle decides to clean out the refrigerator, since they don't have George around for these tasks. There's some card playing, and finally Boogie gets his HOH room. The decor is light blue, most of the stuff (if not all) is from the very first HOH room that Janelle and Jase shared. Will wants to take a bath, but everyone decides to get in the hot tub instead. There's some wine, so who knows what the night will bring?
"Final TWO, baby!"
Hot tub time, and our four little wet hamsters decide to rate their former housemates. They base the ratings on different things, such as strategy, competitions, popularity, etc. Janelle really REALLY likes Nakomis, and refuses to let anyone give her a low rating, even though she didn't get to play the game long. This goes on for a while until they get to James, who they call a liar, a bad actor, and Will sums up as "wormy". Hee.
"Everyone who thinks Boogie is a troll, raise your hand!"
Will decides that Boogie and Erika should have a baby together. Erika's eyes light up, and baby talk begins. Both Janelle and Erika love the names Vanessa, Victoria and Veronica, while Boogie loves the name Britney. Figures. Will says he'll be an uncle, and Boogie says that Janelle can be the godmother. Will wants the baby's name to be "Chilliam" so they can call it Chill. The whole thing makes me pretty sick, and frankly I don't pay a lot of attention to it. Finally Boogie and Erika leave the hot tub to go to the HOH room, presumably to make a baby. If the mating of two different species will result in a child, that is.
"It's not ME baby, it's you."
Alone in the hot tub, Will and Janelle do their whispering in each other's ear thing. There's a good amount of it, until Will finally says "You're barking up the wrong tree." Janelle, full of wine, gets mad and gets out of the hot tub, to go sit on the couches. Not a word is said, but their silence and facial expressions say a lot. Will is clearly upset to have lost her attention, and seems very uncomfortable with her being upset at him. I'll let the photos speak for this.
Janelle eventually gets up and goes inside without speaking to Will, and Will gives a speech to the camera. He says that she's ruining his life, that the showmance is a joke, that he has a great life and Janelle is trying to take it. He says "Erika and Mike went upstairs to make a baby, and that's less crazy than Janelle." He says he needs security in the house and to bring back Howie.
I don't know about you, but all of my best fights have taken place in the shower.
Janelle's in the shower, and Will joins her. He wants to know if they're cool, and Janelle says they are but Will doesn't believe her. Janelle says he's inconsiderate of her feelings, and he tells her that he's hurt. He say he doesn't know why she can't be patient, and she tells him that she's insulted. They're having this fight, naked, with just a shower curtain between them. Will wants to whisper through the curtain but Janelle won't. Finally Will tells her "I'm sorry you feel that way and if you change your mind, let me know." She responds with "Thanks for being so formal!"
Meanwhile, Boogie and Erika are in the HOH room, having a talk. From what I get of it, he's trying to blow her off. He tells her how he'll have to be in Atlanta with the new restaurant, she replies that it's not forever. He says he adores her, that he appreciates her, and it's a mutual admiration, and she says she wants to pursue something with him. He says he does too, but he doesn't want her to enter into this new thing, and she interjects that she's very loyal. He goes on to tell her that he hasn't had sex since December. Then he says that he goes out with his friends, and his night isn't going to be dictated by a certain situation, and blah blah blah blah blah. Basically he's trying to weasel out of anything serious (like a baby?) with Erika. Later on, Boogie goes down to get Erika's teddy bear, mumbling that he's going to hell.
Will and Janelle talk in the storage room, and she tells him that she's offended by the way he went about things. He twirls her around and gives her a "who's the hottest girl in the storage room?" and of course this brings Janelle back to life. Janelle swears on her Mom that she'll vote out Erika if she wins power of veto, and she gets Will to swear on his brother Ian's life that he'll vote out Erika. Playing fast and loose with the family member's lives, always a good reality show tactic.
Boogie finally gets the horrible leather outfit that he wore in BB2.
The next morning, Boogie is up first, followed by Erika. Doesn't sound like any baby-making went on, and for that the world can be thankful. As my shift ends, Will and Janelle get up, and Will wants to know if Janelle is going to be nice or mean to him today, and declares last night a "misunderstanding."
So that's it, my last live-feed update for 2006. Time for me to pack for a lengthy stay at a mind-altering spa, where I can have the atrocities of this season forever removed from my consciousness, and hopefully rid myself of this unearthly pallor.
"I suggest you remove your foot right now Mike Boogie!"
I'm selling my habitrail, accepting bids now! email@example.com