I am not sure if I got back to everybody or not. If I didn't PM me again. Like I previously said I did not want to post something on here of this nature given the lollipops, sunshine & cotton candy version Bravo, J&B were putting out. That was not what I was hearing/seeing in this area because, like I said, I live his hometown & know many people in common. It was only natural when the group on women got together of course they were a bug topic of conversation. I mean EVERYBODY LOVED Bethenny before Jason so her having a connection to him was awesome. Jason is sort of like a hero in town IIRC the basketball team he was on beat Kobe Bryant when he was in high school. There were things being said that happened at the wedding & trouble right after, but since these stories were coming from people that did not have direct access to the event(s) I would never repeat. What I PMed was something that came from an actual mouth from an actual event. I thought it really odd that while everyone in a 3 county area knew BRAVO was here filming an episode of BEA there was not 1 single story on the news or in the newspaper.
Thing was...knowing Jason...he just never seemed to be fit for Bethenny.
My heart goes out to Bryn and Bon & Carol.
PASnow Bunny, I hope you don't take this the wrong way. I can understand learning things about reality stars from real life, and respecting the privacy of this people enough not to post that. I respect such a choice. But if you are going to post over and over about having information and being willing to PM it, what is really the difference between that and posting it?
Yes there is a difference because anything in here will pull up on a google search. For instance I googled a weird blood ailment for info. As a result I got a posting I made in fort a couple of months earlier.
The difference is that I am not posting it in an open forum where everybody has no choice but to read. A PM is only for those who asked. Like I said I had this information awhile ago but hey this could have just been jealous gossip. When Jason & Bethenny made their separation public then I felt it was ok to post what I knew privately. If you don't want to know...don't ask.
This is why I have become so disillusioned with all things Bravo.
Something that has bothered me about the way this whole thing has been portrayed is the emphasis put on Bethenny's drive in her work as a negative thing. I agree that Bethenny is difficult and I can easily see why Jason couldn't deal with her anymore - that's fair. She's abrasive and she has a lot of issues to work out and here's hoping that this is a wake-up call for her. I don't agree with all the assertions that she will ruin Bryn or that Bryn is in danger from her or that she doesn't have Bryn's best interests at heart, but to each his/her own.
What really kind of bothers me is that the failure of this marriage is being blamed on Bethenny's unwillingness to stop working, to stop pushing her brand. I think it carries a very strong undercurrent of sexism, to be honest. Why shouldn't she continue to work on her very successful career? Is there a point of success at which women should all be satisfied? Or if it's not directed at women, if it's directed at all people that once they have x amount of money they should stop working and focus on their families, then why doesn't anyone say it about the men on these housewives shows or even in real life?
Giving up some family life for work is a choice that is made by millions and millions of people. When men make it, it's framed as providing for their families. When women make it, it's framed a selfish and neglecting their families.
Tears.and.rain, in general terms I agree with you. The gender roles of men being bread winners and women having jobs as hobbies are long gone. I think in Bethenny's case it's brought up and somewhat justified because 1) the articles written have said it was an issue and 2) on the show there were a lot of times we saw Jason pushing for more family time and Bethenny saying she had to work. Also, Bethenny seemed to attach Jason's commitment to her with his willingness to work for her. There are certainly families where family time is not an option because of work - whether that's because work is needed for money or because its needed to keep a successful business running. In Bethenny's case, I think it was constantly searching for more opportunities ... and expecting everyone around her to fall in with her desires.
Right, and I do acknowledge that work and careers put stress on marriages no matter whether it's the man or the woman seeking a successful, time consuming career. But when a woman leaves a man because he was too attached to his career, the attitude is generally that they weren't right for each other in a marriage, but both of those desires - for more family time and for a successful career - are valid. Whereas it seems that when a marriage dissolves because of a woman's commitment to her career, it's not just another issue in the family, it's her fault.
I agree that it seems it was an issue that Bethenny was really pushing for Jason to work for her, and taking it very personally that he didn't want to. Like I said, I think Bethenny has a lot of issues and it's sad, but understandable that this didn't work out.
But what about Bethenny ever suggested she would leave her career after motherhood? Why is it wrong for her to continue seeking opportunities?
I respectfully disagree with you about when a man's career ends a marriage that it is perceived as something other than that reason alone...Maybe at one time that was the case but I don't see that anymore....Having been born in '46, I've seen a lot of changes in men,women and marriages but that sexist way of thinking is in the minority now.
Bethanny, just like anyone else, man or woman, can pursue her career to any extent she wants to but when you decide to marry, and have children, there will be some fall out...and it's just plain physics....
Choosing to include other important things in your 24 hour day, means you need to devote time to them also....there are only so many hours and only so much energy in your waking life.
Something's got to give....spouse, child or career and each is free to decide which.
But I don't think that being a woman with a career is what people perceive as the problem.
Well said Dragonlady. Bravo is rerunning the last episodes of the show this morning and I've been watching to see the benefit of a "now we know they split" perspective. I think it helps to see how Bethenny's drive led to the downfall of their marriage. In everything Brthenny does, her focus is herself and she assumes everyone else is focused on her too. Her total lack of awareness for others in many ways made her business strong. But that many years of expecting Jason to put her needs first while never doing the same for her would kill any relationship. The way she treated Jason business wise also shows through when she got her talk show. I had forgotten that she announced they were moving to LA to her staff, and Jason at the same time. She didn't give him the respect to discuss it with him as her husband first. She put him in the same class as her assistant, driver, and nanny.