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Thread: Bethenny Ever After

  1. #681
    FORT Fogey KatesMom's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by Coco46 View Post
    I always thought Bethanny was exhausting, even in her other show. I'm not sure how much of her personality I could take on a daily basis. Now, it's zero tolerance for me. Even though I agree that Jason is part of the problem, Bethanny will never be happy until she decides she will be. I normally don't quote Dr. Phil, but I have always liked this one: We all continue to do the same thing as long as we are getting something out of it. Wonder what Bethanny's payback is for her behavior? I'm not sure she really wants to change. There is something that continues to motivate her to continue acting this way. I agree, the one I feel sorry for is Bryn.
    I can relate a lot to Bethanny, and my life used to be nothing but chaos. I hated it, but I also fed on it. I finally had someone tell me that for those of us who have lived so much of our lives in chaos, we have to learn to cultivate a taste for happiness. I didn't understand then, but I do now. It is HARD!! I went through plenty of creating the drama and chaos because when things were going good, I was really uncomfortable because it wasn't familiar to me. It took a lot of years and a LOT of work to get to where I am now. And now I absolutely abhor chaos and drama and I avoid it, and people who live in it, like the plague. I am happy today and I have a very drama free life. But it is a daily struggle. Even today, I will hear gossip and chatter and my first thought is to want to get right in the middle of it. I have to force myself to walk away. This is what I see going on with Bethanny. She can get there, but she has a lot of work to do. It's not easy, but it is so worth it!!
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  2. #682
    FORT Fogey PA Snow Bunny's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    I don't recall Jason's parents really being on the show this season.

    I do honestly believe that Bethenny needs to deal with her past where it concerns her mother. It does appear, looking from the outside, those wounds of the past have never closed. She does need final closure there in order to move forward. I am sure her mother is a damaged person & most likely she & Bethenny will never have a normal close mother/daughter relationship. Bethenny is not over it, she needs that closure like she did with her father before he passed away. She doesn't need to have her mother in her life at all. You can see she is still pained by it when her mother sold her story to a tabloid & she did talk about her not ever asking to meet Bryn.

    My therpist told me I would know when I was over my marriage when whatever my EX said/did I wouldn't care. It took me 6 years but now I just don't care.
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  3. #683
    FORT Fanatic Holly in SoCal's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by PA Snow Bunny View Post
    I did stop watching this show awhile back. It just didn't like the way certain aspects of the show were treated. Fame has a way of chaning people & I will leave it at that.
    I did happen to catch an episode that was on my dvr of Julie leaving. You could see stress wrtten all over her face. I fully understand Jason not wanting to give up his job to in order to work for Bethenny. Her essentially being his boss will not bode well for their marriage. I don't care how much she can claim it will be a partnership; it won't be. This is her baby not his.
    The thing I saw is IMHO she is expanding way too fast. She is doing the snack bars & powdered mix for water. The thing is those items have been on the market for several years already. Unless you are a Bethenny fan, what are you going to choose Crystal Light or Skinny Girl when Crystal Light is on sale & you have a coupon? Plus it is very difficult to get shelf space in a supermarket. My son bought me her skin & fragrance pack for Christmas. I tried it twice but I felt like I smelled like I was at a bar & I spilled my drink so I threw it out.
    Even with her cocktail drinks. There are companies out there now making similar products at a much lower price. I bought her wine. While it was good Arbor Mist was just as good & cost alot less. Calories are not an issue for me & since I may have 1 or 2 glases of wine a month not a big enough incentive for me to spend twice as much.

    Now she is going to have a talk show. Ok how many of those can you have & how many have failed? Her target audience is most likely at work when she would be on & really how many of those types of shows do you dvr & then end up deleting without watching? I used to record The Revolution for Tim Gunn. That lasted 2 weeks.

    I wish them the best but when this Skinny Girl, if it is a fad, bubble bursts I worry for this family
    It's amazing when you watch Bethenny supposedly develop a "new" product. Someone else makes it and comes up with the various tastes and formulas (maybe based on her saying..."hey...why don't we do a different kind of low cal alchohol drink or a powdered drink mix") and then all she really does is taste test and decide which sample will have her name brand on it. It's not like she really "creates" anything...she farms that out after having an idea, which most of her "ideas" are copied off of something else that already exists. Daily vitamin packets have been done over and over again as have powdered drink mixes with energy type bars. Nothing is new under the sun....

  4. #684
    FORT Fogey candor's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by KatesMom View Post
    I can relate a lot to Bethanny, and my life used to be nothing but chaos. I hated it, but I also fed on it. I finally had someone tell me that for those of us who have lived so much of our lives in chaos, we have to learn to cultivate a taste for happiness. I didn't understand then, but I do now. It is HARD!! I went through plenty of creating the drama and chaos because when things were going good, I was really uncomfortable because it wasn't familiar to me. It took a lot of years and a LOT of work to get to where I am now.
    Excellent insight! Taking that point further, I think we underestimate the power that our beliefs (which are separate from our wants) have on the lives we create. We may want happy relationships, but if we subconsciously believe we're unworthy, we will subconsciously sabotage our happiness. The problem with Bethenny fixating on blame is that it diverts focus from her own beliefs, which are contributing to their marital problems. Even if Jason is equally to blame, she still needs to fix her tendency to sabotage relationships.

  5. #685
    FORT Fogey GabbyG's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    I like Bethenny, but I think part of her problem is that she has been in therapy so long that she over analyzes everything. In my opinion, no one needs to talk about their problems as much as she seems to want to.

  6. #686
    FORT Fogey PA Snow Bunny's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    I think Jason needs to lay off the "you're damaged" comments. That is not helpful to anyone nor to this relationship. It takes 1 cutting remark to make-up for a million "you're great".

    My EX used to call me lard a$$ all of the time. The most I ever weighed was 115 pounds & that was 9 months pregnant. To this day if I go to eat a second cookie I hear the YOU ARE FAT comment played back into my head & I put the cookie back. In reality I know I'm not fat & I actually am supposed to gain 10 pounds according to my doctor. It is that one hurtful comment that you never get out of your head.
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  7. #687
    FORT Fogey Lizard's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by GabbyG View Post
    I like Bethenny, but I think part of her problem is that she has been in therapy so long that she over analyzes everything. In my opinion, no one needs to talk about their problems as much as she seems to want to.
    She is in pain is trying to figure her way out of the pain. Her looking for validation from her partner is making her supersensitive. She must believe that he respects her and wants her happiness and stop measuring his words. Do not look for validation from him. Just be a friend. She knows she is smart. She knows people like her. Focus on that, not perceived Jason communication shortfalls. If there are true problems with Jason's communications, the problems will be his. There was a facebook quote yesterday I like yesterday, "Happiness is an inside job."

    Bethenny did cut down Ms. Manners calling her a man. I found that inappropriate. She must have some grudge or something we do not know of. But outside of that, I do not see Bethenny cutting a lot of people down to lift herself up. She is charming and self deprecating. I do not find her to be more self centered than average. Everybody is self centered. She is just manufacturing a lot of pain. The parents may be the origin. I do not think healing is in the origin of the pain. They might apologize and that might make a child feel better. But a child cannot make a parent do anything. So the healing must be from not looking for validation from the parent who apparently has problems. Healing comes from God. The body heals. The mind heals. But the mental wound will not heal if you find ways to pick at the scab, measuring all the words looking for validation............I wonder if the psychologist is telling Bethenny to measure her husband's words. If so, the psychologist listening might have a minor therapeutic effect. But she is not getting at the issue.

    Getting away from the "what if" and focusing on the "what is."
    Just my thoughts
    Last edited by Lizard; 04-27-2012 at 11:35 AM.
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  8. #688
    FORT Fogey Lizard's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by PA Snow Bunny View Post
    I think Jason needs to lay off the "you're damaged" comments. That is not helpful to anyone nor to this relationship. It takes 1 cutting remark to make-up for a million "you're great".

    My EX used to call me lard a$$ all of the time. The most I ever weighed was 115 pounds & that was 9 months pregnant. To this day if I go to eat a second cookie I hear the YOU ARE FAT comment played back into my head & I put the cookie back. In reality I know I'm not fat & I actually am supposed to gain 10 pounds according to my doctor. It is that one hurtful comment that you never get out of your head.
    You are blessed to be away from him Snow Bunny. I am sorry for your pain.

    Jason should avoid saying that. It is incredibly hurtful. He is not helping her feel good about herself. I am not sure if he is saying that in response to her not letting Bren be around his parents. If it is, he should use the words: I love my parents. I am so grateful that they are loving. They make me feel good about myself and who I am today. My parents are getting older. I know that they would like to be around Bren more than they would like money. Can we reach a compromise? We have the resources to make that happen. You know that people build self confidence when they know their parents or grandparents love them. This is a win win situation. Is Bethenny extending her feelings about her parents onto Jason's? If he is, he should emphasize that he is sorry for any pain that she has had, and that his parents have not been that way...............nothing good can come of the negative words. He can only accomplish what he wants with thoughtful words. He is causing her pain.
    Last edited by Lizard; 04-27-2012 at 11:34 AM.
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  9. #689
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    When they were talking about the guardian, I don't remember Jason expressing any desire that it be his parents instead. Did he? If Jason feels strongly that it should be his parents, then yes, he should bring it up and they should work out an agreement they both can live with. But I didn't get the impression that it was an issue for him, and don't think he should argue it just because the TV audience thinks differently. The whole discussion seemed rather set up to me anyway - like maybe it was something Bethenny and Jason had already decided privately, and were having conversations on camera in order to set up a dramatic TV moment where they discuss it with Veronica. Heck, for all we know, Jason's parents told them that they'd prefer to be parents than have to care for Bryn every day, and that as long as the guardian made sure that they'd remain an active and important part of Bryn's life, they'd rather it NOT be them.

  10. #690
    Teach your children Uncle David's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by AcookerTV View Post
    When they were talking about the guardian, I don't remember Jason expressing any desire that it be his parents instead. Did he?
    As I recall, Jason did mention his parents being Bryn's guardians. However, Bethany immediately nixed the idea saying they were too old.
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