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Thread: Bethenny Ever After

  1. #51
    Ellie May SugarMama's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by PA Snow Bunny View Post
    ...
    I'm not sure why Bethenny would want to take a step back however part of me can understand it. I am sure part of it is that she wants to build a family for herself, Jason & Bryn first or it can be a defense against getting hurt yet again and wanting to protect Bryn.

    I do think she needs the space to figure it out.
    I'm certainly no expert, but I've got a lot of life (and its pain) experience. Your thought made me wonder if perhaps Bethenny isn't reacting this way to protect Bryn.

    Bethenny has constantly discussed how she never had a family, how what appeared to be family was fake, how she was clubbing and doing drugs at 14, how no one really loved her, etc.

    It might just take her a long time to get used to this new reality of honest, true family love. (Okay, I'm tearing up, as usual when it comes to her! )

    Problem is, if she puts too much space in there, she might not get the chance to see how real it really is!
    To return evil for good is devilish; to return good for good is human; to return good for evil is Divine - Alistair Begg

  2. #52
    FORT Fanatic Pandora2's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Bryn is sooooooo cute!!!!

  3. #53
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    A big part of Bethenny's objection to the traveling is that she could just be exhausted and wanting down time with Bryn. Bryn is what 4, 5 months old? Besides, I don't know how effective it is to argue with a postpartum woman. Maybe it would be best for Jason to give it in the short-run and let things calm down (i.e. instead of visiting parents 2-3 times a month, visit 1-2 times - Bethenny seemed okay with that), with the understanding that in 3 to 4 months they could revisit the decision once they see how the situation is. As great as Jason's parents are, they could also relax and realize that Bethenny wants them to have a good relationship with Bryn. They don't have to worry about whether they will have a relationship with their granddaughter, and can stop putting pressure on the situation.

  4. #54
    Over and Out! Bunny555's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by Boann View Post
    A big part of Bethenny's objection to the traveling is that she could just be exhausted and wanting down time with Bryn. Bryn is what 4, 5 months old? Besides, I don't know how effective it is to argue with a postpartum woman. Maybe it would be best for Jason to give it in the short-run and let things calm down (i.e. instead of visiting parents 2-3 times a month, visit 1-2 times - Bethenny seemed okay with that), with the understanding that in 3 to 4 months they could revisit the decision once they see how the situation is. As great as Jason's parents are, they could also relax and realize that Bethenny wants them to have a good relationship with Bryn. They don't have to worry about whether they will have a relationship with their granddaughter, and can stop putting pressure on the situation.
    She will be a year old in early May. I didn't see Jason's parents make any demands on them at all. They act like any loving grandparents would who would love more time with their grandchild. Bethenny needs to put away the tears and spend some real time dealing with her issues.....the least of which are her in-laws.

  5. #55
    FORT Fogey PA Snow Bunny's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by SugarMama View Post
    I'm certainly no expert, but I've got a lot of life (and its pain) experience. Your thought made me wonder if perhaps Bethenny isn't reacting this way to protect Bryn.
    Protect Bryn from her doting grandparents? We are talking about normal loving people here. They could do nothing other that spoil her rotten which is exactly what grandparents are supposed to do.

    Let me preface by saying I do really like Bethenny & I do understand her maternal instincts. Why is it such a big deal for Jason to take Bryn with him for the day to visit his parents? From what I've seen of Jason, he seems to be a great father. Why is it such an issue if Jason plays golf while he is in Hazleton? I am sure his Mom would love to spend the day with Bryn. Bethenny should have made plans for a day by herself or a girls day.

    IHDK but if she continues this insecurity it will eventually effect her family. I really does hope she can work through her issue with Jason's desire to keep his family close.

  6. #56
    Vidiot 13 is a Winner Champion Poppy Fields's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by Boann View Post
    I really don't think we can say what is or is not "normal" for people to see their family. What I like about all the people involved is that they are all trying to work it out and respect the other person's point of view. Bethenny and Jason come from very different backgrounds and I think that one of the challenges they are dealing with now is that Bethenny's expectation of moving toward a closer relationship with Jason's parents in small doses is different than Jason's expectation. I also think that while we see and hear of how difficult and cold Bethenny's upbringing was, Jason's family still hasn't completely dealt with the trauma of his brother's death. It comes up very often in the personal interviews. Jason will never be able to "make up" for his brother's death. I don't know how much of this is Jason taking on that role, versus how much his parents use that language, but I think that that is a family issue that Jason needs to work on resolving.
    "Normal" is measurable, as a statistic. I really doubt that, even for families who live in closer proximity to each other that Jason and his parents, devoting 2 or 3 WHOLE DAYS every couple of weeks to visiting each other is not the norm. I guess we could do the research on it. But my wager is that this is abnormal.
    Last edited by Poppy Fields; 03-08-2011 at 12:59 PM.
    "Blessed is the lonesome pioneer." -- Judee Sill (1973, "There's a Rugged Road")

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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by Bunny555 View Post
    She will be a year old in early May. I didn't see Jason's parents make any demands on them at all. They act like any loving grandparents would who would love more time with their grandchild. Bethenny needs to put away the tears and spend some real time dealing with her issues.....the least of which are her in-laws.
    Yes Jason's parents are loving grandparents. I do think though that they could say "We do hear what you are saying and how about we come up with a plan for visits during the next few months and see how that works." Instead it is an on-going request pushing against the boundaries that Bethenny keeps trying to establish. If I was in a situation were I kept saying to people that a situation wasn't working for me and I needed to make a change, then the people agreed with it, but then started pushing against those boundaries - however nicely - I'd be climbing the walls too. Bethenny wants them in Bryn's life, just not for whole week-ends 2 to 3 times a month. I really don't think that she is being unreasonable. I don't think that the grandparents are being unreasonable in making the request, but I do think that they are testing boundaries, and they have expressed anxiety over what they perceive to the the possible consequences of seeing Bryn less - i.e. Bryn won't get to know them. This making it Bethenny's problem to manage the grandparent's anxiety I object to.

  8. #58
    Vidiot 13 is a Winner Champion Poppy Fields's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by Bunny555 View Post
    She will be a year old in early May. I didn't see Jason's parents make any demands on them at all. They act like any loving grandparents would who would love more time with their grandchild. Bethenny needs to put away the tears and spend some real time dealing with her issues.....the least of which are her in-laws.
    Maybe they should consider moving to NYC.
    "Blessed is the lonesome pioneer." -- Judee Sill (1973, "There's a Rugged Road")

  9. #59
    FORT Fogey PA Snow Bunny's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    From what I gathered was Jason wanted to take Bryn to Hazleton for the day not 2 or 3 days and the main reason for his going was a request from Bethenny to store things at his parents house. It was okay to take Bryn if he could be back in 3-4 hours which isn't realistic since the drive is over 2 hours.

    Bethenny has stated numerous times that she was not close to either of her parents & in fact did not invite her mother to her wedding. I just don't understand the reluctance on her part. I do understand the separation she desires. Jason's mother did say she did understand & agree with what Bethenny was saying but I am sure a whole big part of her wishes Jason & Bethenny lived just down the street.

  10. #60
    Vidiot 13 is a Winner Champion Poppy Fields's Avatar
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    Re: Bethenny Ever After

    Quote Originally Posted by PA Snow Bunny View Post
    From what I gathered was Jason wanted to take Bryn to Hazleton for the day not 2 or 3 days and the main reason for his going was a request from Bethenny to store things at his parents house. It was okay to take Bryn if he could be back in 3-4 hours which isn't realistic since the drive is over 2 hours.

    Bethenny has stated numerous times that she was not close to either of her parents & in fact did not invite her mother to her wedding. I just don't understand the reluctance on her part. I do understand the separation she desires. Jason's mother did say she did understand & agree with what Bethenny was saying but I am sure a whole big part of her wishes Jason & Bethenny lived just down the street.
    If she's still breastfeeding, it's not such a good idea. Even if she's not breastfeeding, Jason expecting to be able to take the baby away for 2 or 3 days is pretty odd.

    When she's a bit older - say 3 y.o. (and potty trained), I could see going off to grandma's for a few days. But not now. I don't think it's at all unreasonable for Bethenny to balk at the idea.

    Just because Bethenny doesn't have a close relationship with her own parents does not make her incapable of understanding why Jason is close to his. However, his are capable of coming to see their granddaughter. And, unlike Bethenny's, they are welcome there.
    "Blessed is the lonesome pioneer." -- Judee Sill (1973, "There's a Rugged Road")

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