I think that people usually work hard at putting their best foot (feet?) forward and you may not know the real person until you're waaay deep into the relationship. You will know when that mask begins to slip down, if you're not listening closely to what is being said and done and taking it seriously. We can get so blinded and fogged over by love and romance that we will not see the forest for the trees. It's kind of scary, actually. It can be hard to keep our rationality when we seem to have been raised, all our lives, to look for the fairy tale. We need to be raised with the mantra of, "When people tell you who they are, BELIEVE THEM." I know that had I done that, that I wouldn't have made a lot of the bigger decisions that I made.....but then again, maybe I would have?