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Thread: RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

  1. #1
    Being VIP Yardgnome's Avatar
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    RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

    Greetings and salutations to everyone. I have been running around like a crazy person the past couple of days trying to study for exams, pack up my house, prepare my new condo, and work full-time. Yet, I donít seem as busy as Vicki keeps claiming she is although Iím still not sure what she is doing that is making her so crazy. Last week we saw Tamra get super inappropriate with her own son and act like a common street whore at a club with her husband. Vicki and Jeana worked hard at boot camp while Lauri still lives in a world of delusion where she is perfect and her husband is attractive. Tammy was somewhere on the episode but what she did I donít know and to be honest I donít really care. Time to jump into the shallow end of the OC County pool and watch these self obsessed women try to pretend they have it so much better than usÖalthough Iím sure if I was homeless I would still be better than them.

    Defenses from Mother that should be used against Mother!

    To kick the show off Briana and Colby are training at Jiu Jitsu as a couple and that is just so precious. They are totally in love and want to do everything together. They plan to not have sex until marriage and Vicki fully supports that. Since they are not having sex until married they like to fill their hours participating in a sport that looks like erotic wrestling. I guess rubbing yourself all over each other is all you are going to get here.

    Vicki decides to pay Briana a visit at her home and bring her mass supplies of water and defense sprays. Vicki wants Briana to have the sprays with her at all times so that she is always safe. Can you say ďcompletely nuts?Ē Vicki is really proud that Briana is going to graduate nursing school but sheís not so happy that Briana and Colby are still dating. I think sheís a little jealous that her daughter actually has a loving relationship and that she has to compete against someone for her daughterís attention. This is one whacked out family.

    Meanwhile, over at the Brady house, Lauri is painting some walls that she asked Ashley to do, but she never did. I am really surprised to see her doing some physical labor here. Sophie is helping her paint and Laurie tells us she is the only of her children that she still likes.

    Today is Meganís 21st birthday and she goes out to some biker saloon in Huntington Beach to ring it in the right way. I can remember my 21st birthday like it was yesterday. Spending the night in the bathroom from excessive drinking, yeah, good times. Megan is well on her way to having the same type of birthday as me except I wasnít dressed like a skank and I didnít invite my mother along. Donít get me wrong, sheís a great mom but there are some things she just doesnít need to know about me.

    Ryan, Tamraís prize child, tells us about what an awesome life he has by sleeping in till 3 in the afternoon and getting tattoos. He is mad that Spencer, the young son, doesnít get yelled at to help around the house and he does. My mouth just drops open and I yell ďyou are 21 years old, get a job, get your own place, stop being such a freakiní loser!Ē Alas, he doesnít seem to hear me and I pull out pen and paper and start to write a very firm letter to him. How can you be such a loser and be proud of it? I just canít get over this.

    This next little part of the show kind of surprised me, Kara is trying to become an actress. She has a part that she is going to audition for and spends a little time with an acting coach going over lines. I feel a little bad for her because she canít pronounce tres chic and that just seems pretty basic. She is not a great actress but best of luck to her.

    Time to make Mama proud!

    Over at Vickiís house, Michael is home for the weekend and he has brought his new girlfriend with him. Briana, Colby, Michael and his girlfriend Laura go out for sushi together. Michael of course chugs excessive amounts of alcohol making his mother proud. We also come to find out that Michael is going to work for Vicki over the summer and learn how to sell insurance because he wants to go into the business. His goal is to buy a yacht by selling insurance. He is a great son! Briana then tells Michael about their mother not letting her go to Seattle to see Dave Matthews with Colby. Michael tells her what all of us are thinking, to just go. Finally, some solid advice from someone claiming to stand up to their psychotic mother.

    Ryan, the biggest loser on the show, has rolled up to the tattoo parlor to get a huge ass tattoo printed on his chest. I wonder where the money to pay for this monstrosity is coming from. I really hope that face that he is having done is not supposed to be a likeness of his mother. He thinks his mother is going to be pissed about this new addition. He better not make mama too mad, she does foot all of his bills after all.

    Tammy and Lindsey are busy baking cupcakes over at Tammyís house in honor of Meganís birthday. Tammy is throwing a harbor cruise for Megan for her birthday, a grown up tea party is how she describes it. The cupcakes actually turn out even though there is no muffin pan being used. We also get a glimpse of Riley who seems to be non-existent this season.

    Kara is off to her acting audition and Jeana is coaching her in the car because she was once an actress. The audition seems to actually go well and not embarrassing like I previously though. She is supposed to be a mean girl but she just seems too nice to be mean. After the audition, Kara gets a call and did not get the part because they wanted a thinner girl. Hollywood is so messed up, Kara is in no way a large girl and that is just a shame. She decides to get her education so she has something to fall back on. I think that is a very logical decision and makes me remember why I actually like her.

    The next part is what I have been waiting for, Ryan comes home to show off his hideous tattoo. He goes into the room where Tamra and Simon are relaxing and pulls up his shirt to show off his new artwork. Tamra is surprised because she thought he was getting his arm done and not his chest. He goes to remove the plastic wrap but seems to be having a hard time so Tamra comes over like a wild cat and just rips it off. I donít know if it was sexual or aggressive but uncomfortable nonetheless. She gives him a little scolding and is surprised that he would do this. Simon looks forward to him getting all these tattoos removed.

    Birthday Party Blowout

    For Meganís birthday, Tammyís boyfriend is going to drive Megan and her female friends around the harbor for her birthday. Unbeknownst to Tammy, a whole bunch of boys and liquor show up to the event. Everyone proceeds to get loaded and Tammy is not at all happy about what is happening. Iím just glad this girl has any respect for her mother, sister or the boyfriendís boat. She is a spoiled little brat and this whole event is just pissing me off. Megan getís really drunk and tells her mother she is allowed to be an idiot because itís her birthday. I wonder what her excuse is for the rest of the time of the year.

    Megan and Tammy get into a big argument and Megan canít understand why her mother is being so strict about everything. Some of Meganís friends get into the cake and start throwing it at her and around the boat. Michael, the boyfriend, gets really mad and kicks everyone off the boat. Megan seems shocked that he is doing this but I canít blame him at all. Who acts like this? I am just really disgusted by this whole episode tonight and the way all these young adults are acting.

    Tamra and Simon are out on a date and they get into a little discussion about Ryan and what a loser he is. Tamra is finally admitting that letting him move back into the house was maybe not the best idea. Tamra canít believe he is behaving the way that he is and that maybe something needs to change. She starts to cry and I just sadly shake my head because she says all this stuff but is going to do nothing about it. Sheís going to send Simon in as the bad guy and take no accountability for anything. I hate all these people!

    Next week
    Tune in to see Ryan actually pretend to have a job. King asses, Colby and Shane, become closer and assier (is that even a word?). Lauri goes wedding dress shopping and I throw up a little and of course, the introduction of the new Housewife.

    If you think Vicki is actually busier than me, send me a PM and I may or may not have time to get back with you.
    Last edited by Yardgnome; 12-13-2007 at 11:47 PM.

  2. #2
    who's gonna check me,boo? ladychat's Avatar
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    Re: RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

    Awesome recap!

    Can you get over Vicki asking Brianna if Colby is proud of her?\:nono :nono

    Or Lauri pretending to paint?



    The recap is better than the show.
    East of Reality

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    Re: RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

    Thank you for a nice recap.

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    FORT Fan ms scarlett's Avatar
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    Re: RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

    Thank you - I think the recap was more entertaining than the actual show!

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    Re: RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

    hee hee...great job, yardgnome. It's like watching it on Tivo only better.

  6. #6
    It's not easy being green Toad's Avatar
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    Re: RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

    Quote Originally Posted by Yardgnome;2708832;
    Greetings and salutations to everyone. I have been running around like a crazy person the past couple of days trying to study for exams, pack up my house, prepare my new condo, and work full-time.

    Good luck in your new house, Yardgnome. Another great recap!!

    BTW, did you have to downsize to ONLY 3,000 sf?
    Ribbitt

  7. #7
    Being VIP Yardgnome's Avatar
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    Re: RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

    Quote Originally Posted by Toad;2709072;
    BTW, did you have to downsize to ONLY 3,000 sf?
    More like 10,000 sf. It's just shameful that I have to live like a pauper now.

  8. #8
    Who? SindyLew's Avatar
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    Re: RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

    Yardgnome, you ROCK. Several of your lines in your recap are "Prize" worthy:

    Lauri still lives in a world of delusion where she is perfect and her husband is attractive.

    Time to jump into the shallow end of the OC County pool and watch these self obsessed women try to pretend they have it so much better than us…although I’m sure if I was homeless I would still be better than them.

    Tune in to see Ryan actually pretend to have a job. King asses, Colby and Shane, become closer and assier (is that even a word?). Lauri goes wedding dress shopping and I throw up a little and of course

    LOVE your recaps...they are my FAVE! Thanks for a good laugh!

  9. #9
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    Re: RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

    Thanks for another fantastic recap Yardgnome....I always look forward to them.

  10. #10
    FORT Fogey Margaritaville's Avatar
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    Re: RHOOC 12/4 Recap: You Reap What You Raise

    Yardgnome - that was the best re-cap yet! Loved it. How on earth did you find the time? Oh wait, did Vicki help you with the multi-tasking?? Please dish....

    And I loved the new word "assier" !!

    So sorry to hear about your new "shack". Perhaps we can all chip in a bit to help you better your housing situation?

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