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Thread: Carson's Greatest Lines

  1. #71
    Caged Mah Jongg Solitaire Champion Maveno's Avatar
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    Ok. I've got the ONE quip that I'm sure nobody caught!!! Although I didn't read the entire thread, cause I've gotta go watch Paradise Hotel right now......

    ::::drum roll:::::



    Jay Leno is lying on a message table and they just unwrapped his hands.....


    ::drum roll please::


    Carson: "Now THAT'S a nice hand job!"



  2. #72
    FORT Fogey eldee's Avatar
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  3. #73
    FORT Fogey
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    After George's haircut: "You took away Xena and brought us a Baldwin!"

  4. #74
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    Ones that cracked me up the hardest were:

    Girl is quite obviously cold:
    "There must be some Toros in the atmosphere"

    Straight guy is putting contact lenses in:
    "I'm gonna squirt into the palm of your hand"
    "Sometimes a dry finger is good."

    Straight guy trying on a baseball jersey:
    "Are you a pitcher or a catcher?"

    Adam Zalta gives his wife earrings to match her pearl necklace:
    "Everyone loves a pearl necklace!"

    Episode with the tea - I know Carson made some kind of "teabagging" joke.

    He's a riot.

    http://www.geocities.com/ilovethefab5

  5. #75
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    My favorite line - from Butch episode. I'll have to wait for a rerun to make sure I'm remembering it right.

    Butch: (trying on shirt) Do you want the sleeves pushed up? Because I like them straight.

    Carson: I like them straight too. But it usually doesn't work out.

    My favorite visual (agreeing with other posters) is Carson's gesturing like a mad orchestra conductor with the salad tongs while he explains (quite seriously) to Butch that it's not a Make Over, it's a Make Better.

  6. #76
    FORT Regular Angel66668's Avatar
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    Carson is the show, IMO

  7. #77
    FORT Fanatic PPerez's Avatar
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    The two that I can remember are......and they're not exactly word for word but close enought.

    "What did JC say about these (holding wire hangers)?? Not Jesus Christ but Joan Crawford."

    "We don't want a DRI. A dance related injury."

  8. #78
    FORT Regular realitygroupie's Avatar
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    I can't remember the saying now but it was something like, its the sizzle that gets the steak eaten?? or something to that affect. Does anyone remember what it was? I was LMAO when he said it but now I can't remember what it was.

  9. #79
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    I think it's a Carsonism...

    I have a lot of gay friends, but I haven't heard this one yet: On the George show, Carson referred to a speedo as a "banana hammock"... my husband was on the phone and I was crying because I was trying not to laugh out loud. The phrase is right on with the visual (unfortunately...).

  10. #80
    FORT Fogey eldee's Avatar
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    Saffron

    What is the George show?

    BTW, I heard that Carson likes his bananas in bunches!

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