Carson's Greatest Lines

[Maveno]

Ok. I've got the ONE quip that I'm sure nobody caught!!! Although I didn't read the entire thread, cause I've gotta go watch Paradise Hotel right now......

::::drum roll:::::



Jay Leno is lying on a message table and they just unwrapped his hands.....


::drum roll please::


Carson: "Now THAT'S a nice hand job!"

[eldee]

[CaliGirl]

After George's haircut: "You took away Xena and brought us a Baldwin!"

[burbanknate]

Ones that cracked me up the hardest were:

Girl is quite obviously cold:
"There must be some Toros in the atmosphere"

Straight guy is putting contact lenses in:
"I'm gonna squirt into the palm of your hand"
"Sometimes a dry finger is good."

Straight guy trying on a baseball jersey:
"Are you a pitcher or a catcher?"

Adam Zalta gives his wife earrings to match her pearl necklace:
"Everyone loves a pearl necklace!"

Episode with the tea - I know Carson made some kind of "teabagging" joke.

He's a riot.

http://www.geocities.com/ilovethefab5

[dom01]

My favorite line - from Butch episode. I'll have to wait for a rerun to make sure I'm remembering it right.

Butch: (trying on shirt) Do you want the sleeves pushed up? Because I like them straight.

Carson: I like them straight too. But it usually doesn't work out.

My favorite visual (agreeing with other posters) is Carson's gesturing like a mad orchestra conductor with the salad tongs while he explains (quite seriously) to Butch that it's not a Make Over, it's a Make Better.

[Angel66668]

Carson is the show, IMO

[PPerez]

The two that I can remember are......and they're not exactly word for word but close enought.

"What did JC say about these (holding wire hangers)?? Not Jesus Christ but Joan Crawford."

"We don't want a DRI. A dance related injury."

[realitygroupie]

I can't remember the saying now but it was something like, its the sizzle that gets the steak eaten?? or something to that affect. Does anyone remember what it was? I was LMAO when he said it but now I can't remember what it was.

[saffron]

I have a lot of gay friends, but I haven't heard this one yet: On the George show, Carson referred to a speedo as a "banana hammock"... my husband was on the phone and I was crying because I was trying not to laugh out loud. The phrase is right on with the visual (unfortunately...).

[eldee]

Saffron

What is the George show?

BTW, I heard that Carson likes his bananas in bunches!