Hey, you can’t fight city hall and you can’t fight Blayne’s –licous suffix. It’s impossible and I will need to scrub my brain with a Brillo pad after this season is over so I quit using it in daily life. But for right now, I’m just going with it. Resistance is futile.
And now for the product placement portion of our program.
Last week really was a drag for Daniel (har-dee-har-har, it’s punlicious!), but not for us viewers who, by and large, had the best time this season. After his departure, Kenley is sad her buddy Daniel is gone but anxious for what comes next. Keith has issues with being in the bottom in the last challenges and vows, as god is his witness, he will change how the world dresses. Well, maybe not such a strong statement, but his listless delivery needs some oomph. Hearing him speak puts me in sleepy-time mode.
Back before Heidi and the runway, it is time for the weekly walk-off let-down. Kelli’s and Daniel’s models are both on the chopping block, since we had the drag queens last week. As the prior winner, Joe gets to choose but opts to keep the peace with the models and stays with his model. So Germaine and Elena are out and Topacio stays. Heidi then sends the designers off to the rooftop of 142 West 31st Street to meet their next challenge. Blayne thinks it will be some super-secret penthouse; Korto hopes it is Mariah. Leanne reveals it is a parking garage and she has no idea why they are there. They enter the car elevator and ride it to the rooftop. As the door slowly opens, a bunch of Saturns are lined up on the roof and there’s Tim and Chris Webb, lead color designer for Saturn. The cars are VUE hybrids which are 50% recyclable. My old Saturn was 100% recyclable—for cash so I could buy a new car. No more of that breaking down every six weeks for me, bucko!
The designers will use the materials in the cars to make their outfits—the cars are stocked with materials so they don’t have to actually rip the cars apart. Tim says the challenge, like the first one, is all about innovation and, frankly, they didn’t rise to the first challenge, so they need to step it up. The designers only have 4 minutes to load the carts and bags provided with the materials stocked in the cars. They get stuff like floor mats, seat covers, seatbelts, and rubber liners. Jerell picks up dashboard appliqués and a headlight. Suede picks a bunch of stuff and breaks out the “wackadoodle” comment he’s trying to make a catch phrase. The designers are laden with loads of stuff but none seem to have a real clue as to what they are going to make.
With some struggle, they get their materials back to Parsons. Tim says they have until midnight and the winner will have immunity. He reminds them again the challenge is about innovation and to have fun.
Joe gets some gloves and a hammer and breaks up parts. Blayne breaks up some mirrors. Keith is worrying about pleasing the bleeping judges and thinks going tailored and toned down is the way. He’s such the misunderstood artiste! Stella doesn’t want to make a leather dress again, but she does love her grommets. She, like the others, just starts taking stuff apart and hopes inspiration strikes. Suede decides to make dress out of the rubber floor mats and it has ripped up his hands. Apparently the stitching has created a biohazard with his blood all over it. How appealing.
Next week on PR: Suede talks about the time his puppy died.
There are nine hours on the clock for the day and everyone is working hard. Stella has decided to do something different for her—a skirt with tiers of seatbelt straps—and make it pretty. Suede once again dredges up a memory of a deceased relative. First, I’m sorry that his grandfather and dad both have passed away, but seriously, how weird is it to look to your deceased male relatives for a drag queen outfit (presuming, of course, the deceased is not a drag queen) and a dress from car materials (presuming, of course, that deceased is not a transformer)? He says, in the obviously producer-guided confessional, that his favorite car memory is when his father gave him his great uncle’s 1966 Buick Electra. Suede is confident his deceased father is looking down on him from up above. If he’s looking down from up above, all he’s gonna see is that weird blue stripe on Suede’s head.
Keith is using the tan leather pieces to make a leather skirt that is high-waisted and tailored. He is pandering to the judges’ call for diversity. Korto is weaving seatbelts together to make her material. Kenley doesn’t want to use seatbelts because everyone else is, so she draws zebra print on air vents for a skirt. Blayne wants to make a flowy gown out of seat belts but the machines can’t really take the material and he’s having a hard time. Meanwhile, Jerell is not having difficulty and is happy with the challenge. Jerell always seems happy in his oddly low-cut tank tops.
Leanne is making a cocktail dress out of black material and is careful to use the seatbelts differently than everyone else. It’s a black dress, and with only the top pieced together on the form, it looks quite dominatrix-like, as Blayne comments. Okay, even a broken clock is right twice a day. Terri confesses that really needs the opportunity Project Runway affords because she wants to start her own label and doesn’t want to go back to her old job. Kenely is behind but everyone is too, and that’s just when Tim comes in with the models for a fitting. Increasing Kenley’s stress, Tim informs her that Shannone had to drop out of the show and they’ve brought in Germaine to model for her. Germaine is boxy and not curvy, so the skirt doesn’t fit quite right and gives Kenley even more work to do. Korto has made a coat dress out of woven seatbelts, and tries it on her model. Korto is happy with the way the colors reflect, but the thing hangs like that lead bib they put on you at the dentist when they x-ray your teeth. Stella’s outfit’s muslin base fits so she’s ready to get to work. Kenley continues to freak out.
Tim later comes in for his review. He first stops to chat with Blayne and his draped dress of many seatbelts. Tim wonders if the dress will hold its shape, but Blayne says he will sew in the shape. Tim thinks Blayne has a lot of work to do. Next, Tim takes a gander at Jerell’s progress; he likes the futuristic bodice he sees. Korto’s 60’s mod swing coat dress impresses Tim. Stella tells Tim that she is making a skirt and a vest and is trying to make it pretty. Tim worries that her vest isn’t innovative enough. Leanne shows Tim the highly constructed black dress she’s making; he says it is well-executed and likes it. Leanne also shows him the fringed pieces of seatbelt she may use for an accent on the dress and Tim likes that she’s using the materials in a different way. Keith explains to Tim that he’s working on a panel effect for the skirt; it is supposed to have a tight fit and a high waist. He then describes the tank top he’s going to make, but Tim looks doubtful. Tim then takes his leave but not before commenting that he is excited about what he’s seen so far.
With only two hours until the day runs down, the designers continue to work hard. Korto’s coat dress is stiff on the mannequin and Terri says it looks like something out of Jeepers Creepers. Terri is so overcome by her giggles that she literally rolls on the floor with laughter. Jerell doesn’t like this mean streak in Terri; he says she has two faces and four patterns and he doesn’t trust her at all.
Keith is seriously stressing in the sewing room. He gets up from his machine and warns anyone within earshot to not mess up his machine. Blayne comments that Keith is going crazy, slamming things and swearing all the time. Keith tries to play a sympathy card and confesses he has issues of confidence. Maybe if his aesthetic developed past “shaggy piñata,” he’d have my sympathy. Soon enough, midnight rolls around and everyone heads back to Atlas for some rest. Before going to sleep, Stella calls her boyfriend, who is appropriately called “Ratbones.” In some weird attempt at foreshadowing, we learn that Ratbones and Stella want to have a label together and she hopes Project Runway can “expose her.”
The next morning, it’s all quick work back at Parsons. Korto swears that if she’s in the bottom three, she’s not going out with a fight. I’d like to see that! Real drama is what this episode is lacking. Tim sends the models in for their final fitting, hair and makeup. Keith instructs his model not to sit down in the skirt or it will split. She’s going for hair and makeup and expected not to sit, like that’s going to happen. So, when she comes back and there’s only ten minutes left until runway, the front seam of the dress has about a 2-3 inch tear in it. Keith is livid and can’t believe the model sat down for hair and makeup. Has he ever even seen a salon? Does he watch Shear Genius? How many stylists let clients stand around for hairdressing? But, of course, it’s not his fault.
Kenley still has to add some more hand-drawn detail on her air filter skirt to complete the detail. Leanne stuffs muslin into the hips of her model’s underwear so the sculpted skirt of the dress will hold its shape. Then Tim rallies the troops and sends them out for the show. Korto is calm about her outfit and Leanne thinks it is anyone’s game. Soon enough, we will find out!
A whole mess of seatbelts, a relatively un-bumpy ride.
Before the show starts, Heidi introduces the judges. Of course there’s Michael Kors because, really, what else does he have to do? Season Three’s Laura Bennett is sitting in for Nina; if there’s anyone who can deliver snark with smile better than Laura, I don’t know who. Finally, the guest judge is Rachel Zoe (rhymes with blow) either because she’s there to pimp her new Bravo show or she’s fond car leather. These looks come down the runway:
Jarell’s garment made of seat covers, carpets, resin moldings and metal dashboard trim. The bodice is a bustier with a bit of a peplum finish at the hem and she skirt is short, tight, and black vinyl. The bustier is a beige material, well-fitted, and has a futuristic vibe. The model’s hair is done in a high-rise pony tail that looks like a whip.
Keith’s two piece look made of seat covers, liners, cushions and cargo netting. The skirt is indeed high-waisted but short and in the tan leather. The waist band/cummerbund is in black leather with a cargo net closure in the back. The top is a halter top. It looks like boring sportswear.
Terri’s (surprise) pants outfit made of seat covers, carpets, cushions and cargo netting. The top is a simple sleeveless turtleneck with a cargo net insert across the top of the chest. The pants are fitted and tight with leather at the bottom of the legs. We’ve seen this before and it’s only a matter of time before she gets the “one note” criticism.
Kenley’s garment made of air filters, seat covers, seatbelts and window shades. The skirt was a simple white column, topped at the waist with a tiny overskirt of the car filters and hand-drawn zebra print. The top of the dress is a black patent leather vest. It has a vague retro vibe and is very Kenley.
Leanne’s dress constructed from seat covers, cushions and seatbelts. It is a tight bustier top in black leather with a sculpted short black skirt that juts out at the hips at a formed, rounded angle. The seatbelt pieces are fringed out and placed around the sweetheart neckline and appear like feathers. It’s pretty yet serious.
Suede’s garment made of floor mats sun visors, cargo netting and seat covers. The one-shoulder design of the bodice is constructed mostly of the rubber floor mats and the short skirt is shiny silver, made of strips of the sun visors. It kind of looks like a robot’s skating outfit.
Korto’s swing coat dress made of seatbelts. Korto must have done something to soften the material because the sleeves—that come to just below the elbow—actually have movement and the waist cinches in nicely.
Blayne’s dress made of seatbelts and mirrors. It is a long gown with strips of the seat belt creating a “car wash” style long skirt. The neck line is decorated with broken pieces of mirror arranged in a loose mosaic. It is okay but puckers out at the bust line in an unflattering manner.
Joe’s dress constructed from seat covers, cushions, seatbelts and the car logo. It’s a crew-neck dress with cap sleeves and a short skirt. The dress is mostly black but with the red logo inset in the middle of the chest. Joe says it is motocross, but it looks more Sporty Spice, circa 1996.
Stella’s two piece outfit made from seatbelts, seat covers, seat backs, carpet stays and keys. The skirt is made of concentric layers of the seatbelt while the top is basically a black leather vest. It looks like Blayne’s dress mated with anything else in Stella’s wardrobe.
After the show, Heidi calls Terri, Suede, Joe, and Kenley forward. They are all safe and go back to booze it up or check Rachel’s bags for treats. The remaining six are, of course, the top and bottom three. The models come out and the catty comments fly.
Jerell faces the squad first and explains that he was drawn to the resin interior moldings. Their soft rectangle shape lends a futuristic look to the bodice. Rachel likes the dress and impressed at how intricate it is. Michael thinks it is a bit over-the-top, but in an appropriate way because it gave his mode a look. Heidi comments that the garment is interesting and wearable.
Blayne next explains that he was inspired by the piles of seatbelts in the cars; he thought they draped beautifully even as they sat there. Laura likes the idea of the top with the broken glass, but the fit was off. Michael isn’t a fan of the “car wash” long skirt. Heidi says all the broken glass will get Blayne seven years of no sex. Hey, ya know what, that tanorexia probably will too. Rachel comments that the dress would have been better if the skirt were shorter.
Korto explains she played around with the seatbelt material and then decided to weave as much of it as possible together and use it just as she would any other fabric. Laura thinks her technique worked and Korto created a good shape. Rachel absolutely loves it and would wear it right now. Michael appreciates Korto’s ability to edit her process and provide well-done, restrained drama.
Breaking up the good/bad/good/bad/good/bad dynamic, the panel turns to Leanne next. She explains her sculpted dress is made of car seats and tiny bits of seatbelts fringed out to soften the neckline. Michael finds the silhouette absolutely fabulous, wonderfully styled, interesting and chic. Rachel says she is blown away by the dress and Leanne could go straight to Paris with it.
Stella confesses that she went out of her comfort zone to make a sleeker dress. Rachel thinks the silhouette is lacking and Laura points out the skirt and vest don’t go together. The skirt is soft and intended to be pretty but the vest is regular Stella leatha. Michael agrees that the pairing is a bit random.
And then there’s Keith’s at-bat. He says he was going for a streamlined garment that didn’t look like it came from a car. Rachel asks the model to turn around and explain the gap in the back of the skirt; it looks like the skirt was too small and didn’t close. Keith blames his model for sitting down and splitting the front of the skirt. Laura comments that there was no concept in the design. Keith counters that if he takes his design to an extreme, it’s not appreciated by the judges. Michael says that they are not reining him in but Keith counters that calling a dress a “dowdy chicken” is an insult not a criticism. It is an insult--to dowdy chickens everywhere. Michael says that to be in the business, you have to just let that stuff roll off and move on to the next project.
The designers and models head out while the judges deliberate. Michael and Rachel are impressed overall with the quality of the work. Jerell’s outfit was dramatic, chic, wearable, and presented a cohesive thought. Korto’s coat dress was beautiful and Rachel wants to take it home. Leanne’s dress was flawless and, though she took a risk, the risk paid off. On the other hand, Stella’s garments were okay but they didn’t work together. Blayne had too many conflicting ideas and were not that well-made. Keith’s garments lacked inspiration and concept and was not flattering at all. Michael further notes that the whole “the model and the critic ruined my garment” excuse is lame.
That’s enough deliberating so the designers are called in. Jerell is in but does not win. Leanne is then proclaimed the winner; she’s glad to finally win a challenge. Korto looks like she’s about to cry and/or kill the judges, but she’s in as well as is Blayne. Thus it comes down to Keith and Stella. Heidi tells Keith he had a chance to be innovated but he came out with a boring, poorly-crafted outfit. Stella did not bring any surprise, had disconnected pieces, and was too simple. But then, just as I fear that Stella is out and I have to put my foot through the t.v., Keith is out. Crack open the champagne, the fringe fest is over. Keith keeps it together and doesn’t cry in front of the judges but gets boo-hooing in the confessional interview. This is the most human emotion we’ve seen out of him, aside from being bitchy and shouty, in the season so far. Keith thought the show was a chance to get out of Utah and show his passion (in a monotone, lazy delivery) in New York. Why he can’t just move to New York is beyond me, but he’s off to return to his Utah life and continue wearing bad plaid shirts and baseball caps.