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Thread: 7/26/06 Project Runway Recap. Episode 303: Designing for Bitches

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    Mixing Old Fashioneds PhoneGrrrl's Avatar
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    7/26/06 Project Runway Recap. Episode 303: Designing for Bitches

    Morning has broken the day after Kayne’s Miss USA win. The designers are shown, in what becomes a theme in tonight’s episode, rolling out of bed with less than bright eyes and bushy tails. Kayne, contemplating his win, says he’s happy that he has immunity but he still wants to do a good job.

    Some of the other designers are contemplating Malan’s exit from the episode before. Robert, drumming up what support for Malan that he can, comments that he was a good roommate, and Bradley agrees. Katherine, who was Malan’s partner in the last challenge, says she doesn’t think Malan deserved to go home, but neither does she feel responsible for their losing dress.

    Keep them guessing, it’ll cut down on sleep time

    The designers are once again assembled in front of Heidi, who informs them that their next challenge is to be inspired by one of fashion’s hottest accessories. She tells them that Tim will have more details for them in the morning, but now there is business to be attended to: which model will stay, and which will go? Kayne has the choice of keeping Katia or going with Malan’s Moon. Kayne chooses Katia, and Moon is out.

    Back at Atlas, the designers speculate what the accessory will be—a cell phone? belt? shoe? They needn’t spend too much time pondering the question because the next morning, at 6 a.m., a note is slipped under the apartment doors and read by the groggy contestants. The note is highly suspicious—it is printed in block letters and not signed by hand. The note is ostensibly from Tim, and directs them to traipse northerly and meet him around Central Park. Laura thinks it’s got to be horse-related, so she dons some kind of Connecticut suburb equestrian look.

    These challenges are really for the dogs.

    Off our little diligent designers go, and, upon finding their meeting place, no one is there to greet them. They just stand there, in a big group, in the cold, looking expectantly in the distance. At this point, I’m expecting The Donald, Carolyn and George to helicopter in, abscond with the cast, and replace whatever idiots they’ve got on their current incarnation of The Apprentice. Maybe the letter was ruse! Instead, we get Tim arriving from the grassy knoll, trying his damnedest to manage thirteen little dogs on thirteen little leads. Since when are dogs fashion accessories?!?!

    Tim informs the group that the dogs are to be the designers’ muses, and they are to each pick a dog from the group. Laura is less than thrilled. Not only is she dressed for horses, she is not a dog person. She rationalizes her dislike of dogs by the fact that she has five kids, she could not cope with another living being in her household. She gets stuck with a little fluff ball that looks eerily like Teddy Ruxpin and she’s not happy. She keeps the dog in a giant purse so as not to have to touch it. See, I get Laura to a degree; little dogs are not my cup of tea. Every one I’ve known has been a nervous ball of messiness, who yaps incessantly. Give me a proper dog any day, like a lab or a golden retriever. And those too-cute-to-be-real dogs give me the creeps.

    Some of the other dogs look so much like their designers, it is amazing. Keith picks an odd little dog that has practically no hair on its body except around its head. The dog is called “Morgan”, and I wonder if she’s related to Jay’s model in the first season…they both look a little like they’d been out all night. Bradley gets a poodle and Alison volunteers to trade her dog for his, since he was very concerned about having a poodle.

    Aren’t Jubilee Jumbles a kind of cookie?

    Back at Parsons, Tim explains the challenge a bit more: the designers are going to make a women’s wear outfit that is inspired by the dog, and also make a matching outfit for the dog. The challenge has a narrative component as well, in that the designers are going to have to come up with a story about who the girl is and where she’s going with the dog, The contestants have $150 for shopping, thirty minutes to sketch before going to Mood, and two days to complete the design.

    Sketching proves to be a bit of the challenge, as the dogs aren’t all that good at holding still. We get a glimpse into some of the “stories” that are percolating in the designers’ minds. Alison says her girl is a jet set woman who goes everywhere with her dog. She’s going to make a hot outfit for both the dog and the girl. Angela says her girl is a British headmistress of a Paris art camp called Jubilee Jumbles and she throws a party for the dog, Patty Cake. I’m thinking Angela is off her rocker at this point. Keith doesn’t want to design anything for his dog, and says, “A big collar and a chain is all Morgan needs.” I’m sure Jay wanted a collar and chain too, after she went missing in Season 1.

    More so than any other season, the designers have really taken to Mood. They charge in and pretty much seem to know what they want and know where to get it. Kayne gets a bold Missoni print, and shows it to Robert and Laura. Robert pulls out a pink tweed that just screams Chanel, which is a good thing since his dog is called Chanel. Laura shows her fabric—a understated beige tweed—and comments that she is so much more tasteful by comparison. Kayne likens the comparison not so much to taste vs. no taste but vanilla vs. rocky road. At this point, Laura clearly is not wining the audience—she disrespects small dogs and now she says Missoni prints are tacky. I’m beginning to think that under that hard exterior is an even harder, bitter center, much like a jawbreaker.

    We start to get a look at the beginning of the designs. Katherine is a bit nervous doing a dress, because she’s not done something quite like it before, but she knows she’s got something to prove. Angela is thrilled with all of her vibrant prints, and she is going to use them to make rosettes. I’ve got a bad feeling about rosettes. Remember Star? Remember Lupe? Yeah, just barely, for a reason…inexplicable blobs don’t go over big on Project Runway.

    All the designers are busy working on their first day in the studio, but Bradley looks perplexed and worried. He is behind on his design because it was not working as he’d hoped. He trashes the first attempt, and says he’ll start again in the morning.

    It’s dog-eat-dog in the sewing room.

    Day two of the construction phase starts out with a great laugh. Well, first Jeffrey says some crap about how he’s the best yet again, but what else is new. No, the great laugh comes from Vincent, and this time we’re laughing with him, not at him. He’s got the cutest little doggie outfit made: a shiny black jacket and a matching hat and he’s holding them up just guffawing away at the sight of them. I’m amazed he ever regained his composure.

    Bradley is still struggling to get something done. He’s got issues with the blouse on his design—the skirt looks like it’s come together. They’re all in the sewing room, and he’s futzing with the skirt, and they are discussing that the next day—the day of the runway show—is Bradley’s birthday. Jeffrey, being the asshat that he is, glibly asks what if Bradley gets kicked out on his birthday. Yeah, Jeff, pretty sure he’s thought of that already!

    Trouble also irrupts in the sewing room. Keith attempts to dominate all of the machines, and Laura gets her back up defending Michael. Keith isn’t having any of Laura’s attitude, but you get the impression from his constant smirk that Keith really likes to shake things up and cause controversy.

    Please, please, I’m begging you: Listen to Tim!!!!

    Always a welcome sight, Tim comes in to visit with the designers. He is really impressed with Uli’s use of two different patterned fabrics to make a dress. To look at the two fabrics, you would not immediately think it wise to use either, let alone both, in a design. Tim says Uli makes it work well, and, as always, he’s right. He also like Alison’s design and is very impressed with the detail on both the girl’s dress and the dog’s outfit.

    Tim is concerned about Katherine’s rather simple slip-style dress. She’s also made a very cute hoodie for the dog, which he likes very much. He suggests she do one for the girl too, so that it adds to the dress. She agrees to do it, and concludes the girl and the dog will match even better.

    Tim is also not on board completely with Keith, in that he’s not bothered to do anything for the dog. He’s even more put out over Angela’s outfit, which is a vest-like top and a bubble skirt. The vest top isn’t done, and Angela says that she spent too much time on the detailing on the inside of the vest. That’s right—the inside, which you do NOT see. She lamely says it was to add structure to the top, but I think that could have been accomplished without using three fabrics and piecing them together on the inside.

    Finally, Tim is most concerned by Bradley’s apparent inability to get it together for the top of his outfit. The latest iteration of the top is shaggy, with unfinished edges, and looks very sloppy. Tim tells Bradley he needs to redo the top, to which Bradley agrees, but is quickly running out of time.

    The part where Bradley narrowly escapes death…

    The morning of the runway show arrives, and we’re again treated to shots of the designers tumbling out of bed and stumbling into the kitchen to pour themselves a glass of orange juice or coffee…or ambition, I suppose, if you’re Kayne and a huge Dolly fan.

    At Parsons, the designers have an hour then the models will arrive. From that point, there will be two hours for hair, makeup and fittings. Bradley’s model, Clarissa, arrives and he says she may not have a top. She asks if she’ll be walking down naked, and he says she may not be going at all. At this point, if looks could kill, Bradley’s head would have exploded. She pointedly tells him that she doesn’t want to be out, and then he gets it—he’s got someone else relying on his sorry ass to complete the design. Amazingly enough, he pulls it out, and she gets a top, which apparently what he had done first and then he just put a lining in it.

    Tall models and short dogs don’t glide smoothly down the runway. Who’d have thunk it?

    With the dogs and the girls dressed, we are ready for the runway show to begin. Vera Wang is again in for the MIA Michael Kors; Nina Garcia is present; and we get Ivanka Trump as a guest judge. No wonder I had that Apprentice vibe at the beginning of the show. The thirteen outfits are presented for our judging pleasure:

    Kayne has made a shiny black jacket for both Katia and the dog, Molly. Katia’s dress has a white plunging V neck, with the skinny pencil skirt and headband made out of the Missoni print.

    Uli’s dress, modeled by Lindsay, is made of two prints which she has made complementary to each other. She’s also made a brown jacket to go over the sleeveless dress. I’m impressed that this year far more sleeves have been made for jackets and dresses than ever before. The dog, Einstein, has a little simple jacket on, with one side saying “Hi Ladies”, as a greeting to the judges.

    Robert dressed Danielle in a silken cream blouse and a skirt made of the pink tweed. He’s accessorized with a gold hoop chain belt, making it all very Chanel, who is dressed in a dog jacket of the same tweed.

    Alison has made a linen dress with a satin jacket, but we aren’t treated to a whole lot of detail on the dress, as Toni does not remove the jacket. The dog, Pepito, also wears a jacket. From the quick glimpse we get, the outfits look very well tailored.

    Bradley did not send Clarissa down the runway naked, and Stanley, the dog, even has on a little collar. The outfit came out as a bouffant golden-colored blouse over a blue/grey pencil skirt. Bradley comments that he was happy that on his birthday he did not have a nude girl on the runway, which is much to the chagrin of the piece of the audience who would love to see a naked girl on a runway any day of the week.

    Keith’s refusal to do anything for the dog Morgan results in her wearing a bracelet collar and a golden chain. Luckily, Nazri gets an outfit which is a dress made out of this orange, magenta and gold print fabric. The dress is sleeveless, with a high, fluted collar, fitted at the waist, and has a full-ish skirt.

    Bonnie, who we’ve hardly seen this episode, sends Marilinda down the runway in a dark dress with maybe a cowl collar (it was hard to tell) and a long white jacket/sweater over the dress. The dog Sparkle wore an outfit of the same fabrics.

    Katherine showed the simple green fitted slip dress on Amanda and the matching green hoodie on Talulah. Despite having told Tim she was going to do a hoodie for Amanda, she decided against it to spend more time on Talulah’s outfit.

    Michael, another one who hasn’t gotten a heck of a lot of screen time, made a fitted caramel colored dress for Alexandria. It has an intricate collar, with overlapping pieces, and a cut-out back. The fit is fantastic. He’s also made a little doggie jacket for Carly out of the same material.

    Vincent, probably much to Jia’s relief, sends her down in a normal-looking black tank dress and a beret, not a basket. I feel certain there must be more to the dress than what was visible on the screen, because the dress looked even more basic than Katherine’s. Jia also had on to-the-knees tights. I was unaware those were made past 1986. Lil’A, the dog, wore the shiny jacket well, but did not like the tiny hat he had on. Apparently Lil’A had seen the first episode and was quite the skeptic about Vincent’s hats.

    Laura, using her understated tweed, made a suit for Katie. The suit jacket had fringe that made the collar look lined in fur, like a lion’s mane. Methinks Laura is a cat person. The fit is great, but the look seems a bit less than original. Sophia, the dog, also wears a coat made of the same tweed.

    Angela, also suffering from lack of originality, sends Camilla down the runway in a shiny bubble skirt that looks not too different from the one Angela is wearing herself. Camilla is also wearing tall, clunky boots, much like Angela. The dog, Patty Cake, has a little jacket made out of one of the handful of prints Angela picked up at Mood.

    Finally, brining up the rear, Jeffrey’s dress worn by Javi comes out. The top is a couple of strategically located triangles of fabric of a brown print, and the skirt part of the dress, which starts rather high, is three tiers of light cream/white fabric. The dress fits very well, but I am sick of that top. Flex the dog wears a jacket made of the same material that forms the dress top, but tries desperately to get it off.

    I’m sure PETA has something to say about these girls using dogs as accessories.

    The judges call out Alison, Bradley, Keith, Angela, Katherine and Uli, who represent the top and bottom three. The rest are safe for now, and off they go. The models come out, and the judges ask each designer questions.

    Uli tells the judges that the girl she designed for is a young, hip girl who is not afraid of color. She’d sleep till noon, lunch with her friends, and go shopping, to which Ivanka says, “I like your story. It works for me.” Hmmm…I though the story was crap. But then, maybe Ivanka is really saying that she wants that lifestyle; I could get behind that thought.

    Katherine says she was designing for a simple woman who may need a dressier dress on occasion. The judges all like the doggie hoodie but comment that the dress is lackluster and the construction, especially the finishing on the hem, is poor.

    Alison says her girl was a Japanese fashion buyer who traveled with her dog to New York for fashion week. The judges like the immensely tall hair she gave her model. Personally, I think it looks a bit like it would have been more at home in the Metropolitan Museum of Art’s Tradition and Transgression fashion exhibit I saw in May in NYC, as it was a too bit punk for a Japanese business woman.

    The judges next question Angela, the purveyor of all things bubble skirt. She says her girl is an assistant director at a Parisian art camp who is throwing a party for Patty Cake, the camp’s mascot. What?!?! When was she demoted from headmistress? No one is buying this story, and Nina just doesn’t get the outfit. Vera, quite the master of the evil complement, says that the skirt is draped beautifully but Angela really needs to focus on style, as in getting some.

    Birthday boy Bradley timidly asserts that his girl is a confident architect who appreciates the idea of simplicity and structure. I think it was a Verbal Kint/Keyser Soze move—he just looked around, thought of Laura, and spewed some crap about her. Nevertheless, the judges, especially Nina, loved the outfit, the silhouette it cut, and the volume of the bouffant top.

    Keith is the last contestant questioned, and he cuts to the chase and says that his girl is a modern, sophisticated lady who does not dress her dog up in chic chic clothes. The judges like his dress but are perturbed he didn’t do anything for the dog. Ivanka does not buy his story that he designed several doggie outfits and bailed on every one of them. Ivanka is a smart cookie.

    Third time’s the charm

    The contestants are sent off the runway and the judges deliberate. They liked Bradley, Uli, and Alison, and it is hard to tell whether they liked Uli’s or Alison’s outfits better. They only liked the dog hoodie Katherine made, thought Angela had no style, and were put off by Keith’s bad attitude.

    The contestants are called back on the runway, and Uli is announced the winner for her bold print design. She has immunity in the next challenge. Alison, Bradley, and Keith are also in, leaving the final decision between Katherine and Angela. Heidi tells Katherine that her dress was poorly executed, was uninspired and had no story. She then tells Angela that the dress was well-constructed but over the top and she has questionable taste. However, Angela is in and Katherine is out, thereby demonstrating that the third time that the judges see the ugly poof balls added on to a garment is the charm.

    Katherine says in her exit interview that she is a bit shocked that she went out, as she liked this dress the most of the three challenges she’s worked on.

    Tune in next week when the rule violator finally gets tossed out and the challenge has something to do with getting real world garment experience.

  2. #2
    Yumpin' Yiminy roses4me's Avatar
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    Nice recap (yeah, I'm the first poster!) I can't wait for the eruption next week.

    I'm not a big fan of yippie dogs, either, although a baying beagle makes me hap, hap, happy!

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    FORT Fogey Quemoni's Avatar
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    Very accurate recap...great job!

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    Christian,Mom,Teacher mom2's Avatar
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    Very nicely done ...

    next week:
    Please please please please please don't let it be Kayne!!!
    "Quotes on the internet may not be accurate." - Abraham Lincoln

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    Naming The Happy Yappies

    Well done recap! Thanks for including both the names of the models and the adorable little furdels! So far, I can barely remember the names of the designers!
    Quote Originally Posted by roses4me View Post

    I'm not a big fan of yippie dogs, either, although a baying beagle makes me hap, hap, happy!
    Roses: My next door neighbor has a Bay, Bay, Baying (eternally) beagle ...I'd be Hap, Hap, Happy! if you'd come get him...

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    Welcome to Hippo Heaven dogabone's Avatar
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    I like my dogs like I like my men: big and stupid!
    Mother Hubbard
    Queen of the Grammar Hammers

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    Thanks for such a quick and great recap!

    Did Bradley's top and skirt remind anyone else of Daniel V's NYC inspiration challenge where he modeled a top after a flower in Michael "The Orange Man's Knows What You Ate for Lunch" Kors' office?

    The Hilton sisters should be forced to follow the Trump siblings around until they too learn to speak in a way that reflects their privilege instead of in a way that reflects porn-dialogue as written by a mentally challenged child. How embarrassed would you be to be Rick Hilton and look at your idiot daughters with 24 hour weddings, porn tapes, and daily humiliating incidents and then look at Donald Trump's daughter who seems funny, smart as a tack, motivated, and has never been involved in a cheap scandal or publicity stunt? Compare Ivanka's personality that came through just in judging to the black hole that was Nicky Hilton last year - despite much more screentime.

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    i was sad that angela did not get kicked off.

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    FORT Regular Suresam85's Avatar
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    great re-cap! I was shocked that Angela didn't get booted off with that awful thing she created!

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    Endlessly ShrinkingViolet's Avatar
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    You're so fast as getting these out. Fabulous job, PhoneGrrrl! You captured the essence of this episode, starting off with the title.
    Designing for Bitches

    At this point, I’m expecting The Donald, Carolyn and George to helicopter in, abscond with the cast, and replace whatever idiots they’ve got on their current incarnation of The Apprentice.

    She gets stuck with a little fluff ball that looks eerily like Teddy Ruxpin and she’s not happy.

    The dog is called “Morgan”, and I wonder if she’s related to Jay’s model in the first season…they both look a little like they’d been out all night.

    Aren’t Jubilee Jumbles a kind of cookie? <---Yes, and they have a lot more taste than that outfit had.

    “A big collar and a chain is all Morgan needs.” I’m sure Jay wanted a collar and chain too, after she went missing in Season 1.

    I’m beginning to think that under that hard exterior is an even harder, bitter center, much like a jawbreaker.

    I’ve got a bad feeling about rosettes. Remember Star? Remember Lupe? Yeah, just barely, for a reason…inexplicable blobs don’t go over big on Project Runway.

    we’re again treated to shots of the designers tumbling out of bed and stumbling into the kitchen to pour themselves a glass of orange juice or coffee…or ambition, I suppose, if you’re Kayne and a huge Dolly fan.

    we get Ivanka Trump as a guest judge. No wonder I had that Apprentice vibe at the beginning of the show.

    Bradley comments that he was happy that on his birthday he did not have a nude girl on the runway, which is much to the chagrin of the piece of the audience who would love to see a naked girl on a runway any day of the week.

    Lil’A, the dog, wore the shiny jacket well, but did not like the tiny hat he had on. Apparently Lil’A had seen the first episode and was quite the skeptic about Vincent’s hats.

    I’m sure PETA has something to say about these girls using dogs as accessories.

    The judges next question Angela, the purveyor of all things bubble skirt.

    However, Angela is in and Katherine is out, thereby demonstrating that the third time that the judges see the ugly poof balls added on to a garment is the charm.

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