1/18 Project Runway Recap: Rootie Tootie Fresh & Fruity!
First off, my title is COMPLETELY stolen from a post by Snowflakegirl, who is brilliant beyond words, as you all know. Apparently that's the name of a a dish at the International House of Pancakes and it made me laugh until I was sick. So thank you, Snowflakegirl, for that! Now, this mess below, is all me.
Suncat's list of secrets pertaining to Project Runway....
1. I think Tim Gunn is one of the hottest men I've ever seen. Hot in a Sean Connery kind of hotness way. Like dazzling white hot. And as a straight female kitty, that's kind of strange, perhaps.
2. I, unlike thousands of others, like Santino's voice.
3. At the end, when Heidi says "Auf Wiedersehen" I always yell "Off Wiener dog!" I don't know why.
Now, that's certainly enough secrets for now, isn't it? A cat's got to keep some things to herself! On with the recap!
Last episode we saw Diana and Marla get eliminated in a team effort designing for Banana Republic. I think Diana was very innovative, Marla was very boring, and neither was quite ready for this competition. But that's so last week, let's find out what's happening now, shall we?
Since Diana and Marla left last week, Chloe has to crash with Kara and Zulema. I think she should get to keep the old room all to herself, but I guess that would make for boring footage. If Zulema's been any more of the closet hog that she was in the first episode, we haven't seen it. She's toned down considerably since then, I wonder why? Is it the calm before a future storm? We can only hope!
The Big Surprise...or Not
The designers gather to have Heidi tell them about the next challenge, but she tells them they have to wait until the next morning, when they'll get a package with all the details inside. The winning and losing models are then brought out, but I won't spend much time on this, because in usual fashion, the previous winners keep their same models. Rebecca and Danyelle stay, Lesley and Cara are out.
Back at Atlas, Andrae, Nick and Santino are tossing around possibilities for the next challenge. Nick wonders if it could be one of those outfits for those people that pass out things, while Santino says "I want it to be a bird, or a chicken suit, I'd love that." And right now, my friends, is where you hear foreshadowing music...mark it down!
Delivery! And What a Creepy Mailman!
The next morning, and you immediately see the back of a mailman, with a pony-tail. My mailman used to have a pony tail, and then one day he didn't. So I asked him if he had to go to court or something. He really didn't appreciate that, so I now try not to tick off my mailman. This pony-tailed mailman rings the doorbell of 35D, and it's Robert, from last season. Andrae, Nick, Santino and Daniel all are polite and introduce themselves, but they don't seem overly impressed with Robert. And I don't blame them.
Next on Robert's route...the girls, and Emmett. Not much going on here, except for this....Emmett has no idea who Robert is. First Emmett guesses "Mario", then Robert tells him that's he's Jay, but then tells the truth. Poor Robert, he has such an inflated image of himself. I find it very curious that Emmett is in 17H by himself yet Chloe wasn't allowed to stay by herself. Does it have anything to do with some very intimate late-night design tips from Tim Gunn?
So, What's in the Package Already?
The designers open up their packages and it's squeals all around, as they pull out ice skating outfits. They are to put them on and meet downstairs. They guys are all cracking up at what Emmett's going to look like, and you can see why.
Once Nick gets a look at him, he says "it's like International Male gone g-g-g-g-gay!" They all prance out onto the street in front of Tim, who gets a hearty laugh out of this spectacle. Then it's off on a fieldtrip, and at least they get to pile in a van and don't have to walk down the street in those outfits.
Brrr, It's Cold in Here, Must Be Tim Gunn in the Atmosphere
Yes, I know, what a stupid paragraph title. Especially since Tim is so hot he could melt ice. And that's where they are, an ice rink, with a skater twirling all round. Turns out it's Sasha Cohen, 2002 Olympian (and soon to be 2006 Olympian) and they are to design a skating outfit for her. You can imagine my letdown when I realized they were to design for Sasha Cohen and not Sacha Baron Cohen, aka "Ali G." Just look at them, which one would be more fun to design for?
Sasha "Olympian" Cohen
Sacha "Hilarious" Cohen
Nick is devastated that he's standing 10 feet away from Sasha Cohen in his tacky costume, apparently he's quite the fan. Sasha tells them what's important in her outfits, such as stretch, not to be too heavy, etc, and we're shown several pics of Sasha in various costumes and poses, including one very similar to this one, which I will call "The Full-on Tootie Pose." You'll understand why, later.
The designers and Tim all put on ice skates and attempt to skate around with Sasha. There are lots of falls, but they all seem to have a great time, and they end it with a "choo-choo around the rink." Well, that was fun!
Down to Business
They are given 30 minutes to sketch, they have a $150 budget and two days for the challenge. No drama at the fabric store, for once. Back at the design studio, Emmett's concerned about sewing on stretch fabric, and lots of people are wondering what the heck Santino is doing.
Andrae To The Rescue
For you non-sewers, an overlock machine is the same thing as a serger, and it's a very handy tool in making a garment look "finished". But for sewing on stretch fabrics, it's a godsend, and Zulema has managed to mess one up. In the most basic (and boring) terms, this machine uses three to four threads at once, and threading it is a maze of threads resembling nothing you're ever seen. When mine messes up, I call my Mommy (a professional seamstress) and cry until she comes to fix it. But the designers don't have my Mommy, they have Andrae, who takes it upon himself to halt everything on his design, and thread both of them. No one seems to care that he did this, however, and at the end of day one he's not very far on his design.
Day Two, and the Make It Work Talk!
Day 2 brings them a visit from Tim Gunn. Yay, my favorite part! Emmett tells Tim that he is going to put sequins on his design in the pattern of Van Gogh's "Starry Night". I find that a strange, and lofty ambition, and Tim finds the outfit a bit dark. Zulema's is to be Swan Lake, iced-over. Tim thinks it sounds ambitious and beautiful. Andrae's is to be "Princess Cyclone" which to me sounds like the name of a roller-derby girl. Tim is anxious to see where it goes. Kara is aiming for something classical, and Tim warns her to have enough innovation in her design. In a catty side interview, Daniel calls her design "basic, but not in a Calvin Klein way, basic in a JC Penney way." Ouch.
Tim wanders over to Santino, which is volatile ground any way you look at it. Santino says the inspiration for his piece is a phoenix rising from the flames. As you'll see many paragraphs above, Santino was hell-bent on doing a bird theme from the get-go. Tim is at a small loss for words over the whole thing, and asks Santino to find a way to respond to the judges that is less "#$%@ you". Which, to me, is saying "they're going to HATE it!"
Down to the wire, Kara breaks a needle in the overlock. There's a lot of hand-sewing going on. Andrae thinks his looks like bad "Valley of the Dolls" while Santino imitates Michael Kors about his own...."It looks like a baboon's ass exploded all over her backside!" Here, for your viewing pleasure, is a baboon's ass, you be the judge.
Tonight's judges are the ever-bitchy Michael Kors (who wishes he was one-tenth as hot as Tim Gunn), Anne Slowey from Elle magazine, and Sasha Cohen. Sasha will wear the winning design in an upcoming figure skating exhibition.
First up, Rebecca in Daniel's design
Rachael in Zulema's design
Eden in Kara's design
Shannon in Emmett's design
Danyelle in Andrae's design
Heather in Santino's design
Tarah in Nick's design
Grace in Chloe's design
After the runway, the designers line up on the stage. Heidi calls Nick, Daniel, and Andrae, and tells them that they can leave the runway, their scores have qualified them to move to the next challenge. The models come out to stand beside the remaining designers. Sasha and Michael both compliment Chloe's dress. Anne thinks that the fringe on Kara's dress is unflattering, while Michael thinks it's very Vegas.
On to Emmett's, which has to be singled out for it's own paragraph. Sasha says she's not keen on the style of the skirt, while Anne says the skirt shows way too much "tootie" and is slightly vulgar. I have never heard that referred to as a "tootie." To me, this is a "Tootie".
Tootie from "Facts of Life"
Well, at least it didn't show off the model's Blair, or my goodness, her Natalie!!! And let's face it, we all show off our Jo once in a while, don't we? And I'll just stop this completely lame attempt at humor before I get to Mrs. Garrett.
Sasha likes Zulema's, while Michael calls it "sexy without being vulgar." Sasha likes the ruching on the stomach of Santino's, as does Anne. But Anne calls the back "Carmen Miranda on acid." Michael compares it to a Thanksgiving pagent.. Santino for once talks very normally, and doesn't argue with anyone.
The judges confer, and they dislike Emmett's and Santino's. Michael wonders if it's worse to go too far, or not far enough. The designers who haven't already been excuse are brought back out, and Kara is immediately told that she's in. The winner is....Zulema. (obvious from photos above.) Zulema seems a bit stunned that she won. Chloe is in. Santino is told that he went way over the top, and that the judges wonder what it's going to take to get through to him. Emmett is told that his design is stale, and doesn't have much imagination. Santino is in, Emmett is out.
And just for kicks, in the Project Runway auctions, at the time of posting this recap, Zulema's winning outfit is bringing a mere $80, while four of her fellow designer's outfits are bringing more. And I'd like to add, that Nick's outfit also shows plenty of "tootie", but that was never mentioned. Join us next week when Zulema turns into the diva we all know she is, and demands a walk-off between the models!
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