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Thread: Project Runway 1/12/05: The Wedding Bell Blues...and Greens...and Fuschias...

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    For Your Entertainment lobeck's Avatar
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    Project Runway 1/12/05: The Wedding Bell Blues...and Greens...and Fuschias...

    This week's show starts with a recap of last week's episode, most notably the part of the show where the designers had to say who on their team should be the one to go. We cut back to Austin in a confessional who says, "The whole runway inquisition was a bit intense. I felt like I was stabbed in the back when Wendy named me because it was complete bullsh*t." A Wendy confessional quickly follow where she says, "My relationship with Austin has suffered. (Gee, I can't imagine why, Wendy) He has adopted this wounded thing. It doesn't sit well with me." Oh well, what they say must be true. I guess all good things do come to an end, because it looks like Mopsy and Flopsy's friendship has hit the skids. We then cut to the Atlas Apartments, where everyone is getting going for the day, and they are all beginning to realize that the intensity has been turned up a notch or two, most notably Jay, who says, "I'm getting competitive now. I want to win this mother f*cker."

    It's time for the designers to find out what this week's challenge is, and, once again, they've all gathered at the infamous runway to get their instructions from Heidi. Before giving the designers their instructions, she says that, to keep them on their toes, the designers will pick their models first and then find out what their challenge is. We go through the ritual once again, and it comes down to Nora picking last and having to choose between Audrey and Melissa to be her weekly muse. Nora thinks about it for a minute and then chooses Melissa, sending Audrey packing. Melissa leaves the runway, and then Heidi tells the designers that this week's challenge is all about the designer/client relationship. That sounds all fine and good, but the wrinkle in the plan is when Heidi announces that the models are the designers' new clients and that it will be up to each designer to design "the wedding dress of her dreams" for his/her client. More than one designer is thrown for a loop, and Jay (who chose drama queen Morgan to be his model) says, "If I had known the challenge, I would have picked a different model." Well, you can't go back and change things, honey, so just deal with it and move on.

    The group is back in the workroom for their weekly meeting with Tim Gunn, and Tim waxes prophetic when he tells the group, "I hope each of you is confident about bringing your own design philosophy to this challenge." In other words, gang, you've got to keep your client happy, but you've also got to be able to infuse your own style and creativity into your design. The models—humming the tune to "The Wedding March" as they enter the workroom—soon join the designers for their initial consultation. You can tell that the models are enjoying the role of client, as many of them waste no time in telling their designer exactly what kind of dress they want. Melissa apparently wants to be a pretty pretty princess, as she tells Nora that she wants a big poofy white dress with roses all over it. You see, Melissa's middle name is Rose, so she just has to have roses in her hair, on her dress…everywhere. It sounds pretty cheesy to me, but I'm just thankful that her middle name is not Muffin or Dung or something like that. The chief boss among them is the infamous Morgan, whom Jay has affectionately nicknamed Morganza. (I would have called her Morgzilla, but that's just me.) She tells Jay exactly what she wants and then says in a confessional, "This is the best, um…oh, you know…what do you call it…challenge, so far." I guess the repeated use of hair color must have resulted in some of the chemicals seeping through Morgan's brain and damaging some of her brain cells. Not that there were that many functioning ones to begin with, mind you. I mean, there'll be no mistaking Morgan for a Rhodes Scholar, that's for sure.

    It's time for the weekly shopping trip, and Tim tells the group that they'll each have $300 and 45 minutes in which to get everything they'll need. The group scurries off in a million different directions, and we see Austin fawning over this god-awful teal and leopard print fabric. He says, "This costs $50 a yard, but it's worth it because it is so fabulous." Fabulous? For who…a color-blind streetwalker? Meanwhile, Nora spends $135 on fabric flowers for her model/client, and I’m cringing just thinking about what that Rose Parade Special is going to look like. Back at the workroom, Jay finds himself "caught up in the emotional wrath of Morgan" and says, "Now I want to sabotage her. But, if I wanted to do that, I'd make a dress like Nora's." Me-ow! Of course, Nora is quick to defend herself and says, "This is not my design. This is Miss Pageant USA's design." But, Nora, don't forget what Tim said at the beginning of this challenge…

    It's time to go back to the whole Wendy/Austin subplot melodrama, and, in a confessional, Wendy (who should really remember to put on makeup before taping her confessionals, but I digress) lets the claws come out a bit when she says, "I feel Austin is a little bit off his game now. He has one frequency that he operates on." Talking about her own design, Wendy says, "I feel really comfortable with this challenge. I expect it will win." Wow, you win one challenge, and all of the sudden you're invincible? Wendy, Wendy, Wendy…let's not forget the debacle of weeks past. We're quick to hear Austin's opinion of Wendy when he says, "She just doesn't understand the basics of design in addition to just being out of tune with the world." Girls, girls, girls…go to neutral corners and take a breather, OK?

    Lest anyone watching the show thinks this group is all work and no play, we get to see the gang going out together to a bar called The Cutting Room, and we learn that Robert is "extremely sexually frustrated" and also apparently has the hots for Alexandra. Afterwards. the group is walking home when Robert sees some scaffolding and attempts to show everybody (but mainly Alexandra) his gymnastics prowess. All he ends up showing us, though, is that he's no Olga Korbut as he falls from the scaffolding and bangs his head on the sidewalk below. But, is Robert concerned about the fact that his head is bleeding rather profusely? Does he care that he might have suffered a concussion? No. All Robert is concerned about is his hair. His friggin' hair. As Kara accompanies Robert to the hospital, he tells her, "If they shave my head, I'm leaving the show." Wait, maybe Robert did suffer a concussion after all…

    It's Day 2 of the challenge, and Tim has stopped by the workroom to check on everyone and their designs. He chats with Jay, who tells him that Morgan wants some weird cut-outs that look like fried eggs put on the sides of her dress. (I think they look like bunion pads, but that's just me.) Jay is not too thrilled with the prospect of having to put those on the dress, and Tim tells him, "Tell her there's a reason she's a model and you're the designer." Oh my…a bowl of warm milk for Tim, please. Soon after Tim leaves, 3 or 4 of the models stop by with their boyfriends/fiancés to check on their designers. My favorite among these is Olga, who marches right in with her boyfriend and starts to try to redesign the dress Kevin is making for her. We later see Miss Olga crying—literally—because her dress itches, and I just want to slap the girl and say, "Oh, suck it up and deal with it!"

    It's time for the fashion show and judging, and we're introduced to this week's judges. Fashion designer Michael Kors is back, and he's joined by Anne Slowey from Elle magazine (I guess even the infamous Nina Garcia has to take a break sometime) and wedding dress designer Amsale. Heidi gives the whole "the fashion business is all about being 'in' or 'out'" speech, and then the show begins. The models come out one by one, and I have to say that the dresses aren't all that bad. Well, except Austin's, that is. His creation is absolutely horrid, and I begin to worry that this will be the week we say goodbye to Mr. Austin Scarlett. Nora's "rose dress" turns out to be not as bad as it could have been, but it still is rather cheesy. My personal favorites are Robert's, Kevin's (which isn't as diamond-encrusted as Olga wanted, thank God), Kara's, and Jay's (despite the fact that Morgan nearly fell and busted her ass coming down the steps to the runway).

    The fashion show ends, and Heidi calls the designers back onto the runway. She asks Wendy, Robert, Alexandra, and Kevin to step forward, and she tells them that they are all safe this week. They've neither won nor lost, and this seems to upset Wendy (who expected to win, don't forget). That leaves us with Austin, Nora, Jay, and Kara, and they represent the best and the worst blah blah blah. Their models are brought back onto the runway, and Heidi asks each model if they're happy with how their dress turned out, and they all say yes. Yes, even Austin's model says she likes what Austin created for her because she didn't want to "go the traditional route". Well, honey, that dress is about as far as you can get from "traditional", so I guess Austin gave you what you wanted. The judges then get the chance to ask the four designers some questions. They praise Kara and the dress she created. They all seem to like Jay's dress, but they do comment on Morgan's inability to walk well in the dress. Morgan retorts, "But, I'm not going to be doing a runway walk at my wedding." I, of course, want to slap the snotty twit, but before I can reach through the TV and do it, Anne Slowey says, "And you weren't doing a runway walk here, either." Me-ow. I think Anne is my new best friend. Anyway, once the question-and-answer session is over, Heidi announces that the winner of this week's challenge is…Kara Saun. That gives her immunity for next week's challenge, and Kara leaves the runway relieved. Heidi then tells Jay that he is safe as well, and he leaves.

    We're now down to Austin and Nora. One of them is in, and the other one is out blah blah blah. Heidi admonishes Nora for compromising her own philosophy too much and coming up with a dress that's fit for Wedding Day Barbie. She then tells Austin that his creation looks nothing like a wedding gown. (I would like someone to tell me what it does look like, because I'm having a hard time coming up with that on my own.) The inevitable can't be put off any longer, and Heidi announces that Austin is…safe. That means that Nora gets the boot and is off the show. Nora is gracious about her exit, and we then see her cleaning up her work area before the show comes to an end.

    Personally, I liked Nora's designs for the most part and thought she would stay around longer than she did. I do agree, however, that in this wedding dress challenge, she didn't put enough (if any) of her own personal design philosophy into her dress, and that is what cost her this week. I don't know, maybe if she had made a wedding dress out of white lawn chairs…


    To contact the author of this recap, send e-mail to lobeck@fansofrealitytv.com.

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    Maine-iac LATAS's Avatar
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    Love it! Great recap and I cant wait for this weeks!
    TRUTH, BOREDOM, HUMOR
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    Mmm, Brady Booty! Hardaway's Avatar
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    Thank you!!

    I missed it this week (Argh!!) so I'm happy that your recap is here! Gotta get my Austin fix...

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    Retired! hepcat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LobecktheMaestro
    Mopsy and Flopsy's friendship

    You see, Melissa's middle name is Rose, so she just has to have roses in her hair, on her dress…everywhere. It sounds pretty cheesy to me, but I'm just thankful that her middle name is not Muffin or Dung or something like that.

    Fabulous? For who…a color-blind streetwalker?

    Wendy (who should really remember to put on makeup before taping her confessionals,

    Girls, girls, girls…go to neutral corners and take a breather, OK?

    All Robert is concerned about is his hair. His friggin' hair.

    I don't know, maybe if she had made a wedding dress out of white lawn chairs…
    Yeah, that nails it.

    Great recap, Lobes! Your wit and style make you such a great recapper for this show. So if you like Lobeck's recaps, be sure not to miss him turning into an American Idol recap machine!
    You've gotta hustle if you want to earn a dollar. - Boston Rob

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    hellooooooo sher's Avatar
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    great recap, lobes!

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    What's The 411? Fanatic277's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lobeck
    You see, Melissa's middle name is Rose, so she just has to have roses in her hair, on her dress…everywhere. It sounds pretty cheesy to me, but I'm just thankful that her middle name is not Muffin or Dung or something like that.

    She tells Jay exactly what she wants and then says in a confessional, "This is the best, um…oh, you know…what do you call it…challenge, so far." I guess the repeated use of hair color must have resulted in some of the chemicals seeping through Morgan's brain and damaging some of her brain cells. Not that there were that many functioning ones to begin with, mind you. I mean, there'll be no mistaking Morgan for a Rhodes Scholar, that's for sure.

    The group scurries off in a million different directions, and we see Austin fawning over this god-awful teal and leopard print fabric. He says, "This costs $50 a yard, but it's worth it because it is so fabulous." Fabulous? For who…a color-blind streetwalker?

    As Kara accompanies Robert to the hospital, he tells her, "If they shave my head, I'm leaving the show." Wait, maybe Robert did suffer a concussion after all…

    Jay is not too thrilled with the prospect of having to put those on the dress, and Tim tells him, "Tell her there's a reason she's a model and you're the designer." Oh my…a bowl of warm milk for Tim, please.

    We later see Miss Olga crying—literally—because her dress itches, and I just want to slap the girl and say, "Oh, suck it up and deal with it!"
    Another excellent recap, Lobeck!

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