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Thread: 9/9 Episode: This Ain't No Holiday

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    Why Not Us? greenie's Avatar
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    9/9 Episode: This Ain't No Holiday

    Somehow Todd Newton comes out in the exact same clothes he had on during the last episode. I could be wrong, but it looks exactly the same. Of course, it’s still incredibly boring with mostly brown leather, but I swear it’s the same.

    Jessica Keenan

    Jessica admires Madonna for her confidence and feels a kinship with her since she’s a small town girl herself. Jessica used to sing a lot as a child. She performed the National Anthem when she was twelve years old, but unfortunately she forgot the words halfway through. Luckily the crowd helped her finish the song, but this destroyed her confidence as a singer thereafter. She has chosen to do this performance in the hopes of gaining some of that confidence back. The vocal coach is not sure she can become Madonna, but the dance coach feels she is just going to have a ball. Jessica promises she won’t forget the words tonight.

    Jessica performs one of Madonna’s earlier hits, “Holiday”. She comes out in a hanging star wearing a white and black polka dotted outfit, the same one Madonna had when she was on tour. She has on a blond curly wig, and from far away she looks like Madonna. Sometimes she seems a little too bouncy, but for the most part she captures the fun of the song. Although this song isn’t very hard to sing, she does quite well and sounds a lot like Madonna. I, myself, actually found this performance to be one of the more enjoyable ones to watch.

    Her score for Vocal technique/Performance ability is 8.95.

    When we come back we meet the judges again with the same spiel given the last two weeks. They still don’t speak, but if anyone is dying to read who they are, I believe my first episode recap is somewhere in this forum. Probably still on the front page since no one even posts here!

    Lenny Hirsch

    Lenny has admired Garth Brooks’s ability to bring in fans from all genres of music. He attended Colgate University where he played lacrosse and majored in finance. He worked in finance for two years. One day, though, he decided to make a list of all the things he wanted to accomplish by the time he died, and he realized none of these things had to do with finance. So he quite his job and now spends more time singing and playing lacrosse. The vocal coach feels Lenny needs to loosen up more vocally. Lenny comments, “Country music is soothing. Everyone has a little country in them”. Not this gal, Lenny, not this gal.

    Usually I don’t recap the interview that takes place between the first clip and the performance because there is never anything significant in it. Tonight, though, Lenny makes the comment “We mock what we don’t understand.” I truly believe this encapsulates my recaps of this show.

    Lenny performs the song “And the Thunder Rolls” or at least that’s what I think it’s titled. He is wearing a blue and black shirt with a black cowboy hat. I don’t really know how much this looks like Garth because it seems to look like all the people that imitate any country performer. He also sings pretty well, but I’m not sure how much he sounds like Garth because as previously stated in one of my other recaps, I avoid country like the plague. There are some thunder crashes during the performance along with some kicking and arm thrashing, but overall I found this quite boring to watch.

    Lenny’s Vocal ability/Performance technique score is 8.48, which is right now in second place.

    Darren Tolliver

    Darren went to college on a football and music scholarship, which he found to be quite challenging. Darren is now pursuing a Masters in education and hopes to also coach football. He heard Meatloaf’s “Bat Out of Hell” when he was young and has been a fan ever since. The vocal coach thinks Darren is quite ambitious and is willing to take criticism that will help him make a dramatic improvement. Although Darren would like to win, he is just going to try to enjoy this great opportunity.

    Darren performs the song “And I Will Do Anything For Love, But I Won’t Do That”. He comes out in a black tuxedo with a red vest. On top of the tuxedo, he is wearing a black cape. He stands in the middle of the stage singing with a microphone stand. He has a longhaired wig on, but other than that I don’t find him ugly enough to look like Meatloaf. He is singing to some random girl across the stage on the scaffolding. Not too far into the song, he throws off the cape and starts to rock out a little more. Even “random girl” is getting her swerve on. I find he looks down a lot during this performance, but his singing makes up for it.

    Darren’s Vocal ability/Performance technique score is 8.95, which ties him for first. Personally I think he should be in second place, but then again I hate Meatloaf and that song.

    Arlys Alford

    Arlys loves Annie Lennox’s unique voice and strong stage presence. She also admires her for her ability to come back from a back injury. Arlys, herself, suffered an injury last year that had her wheelchair bound for months. She was afraid she was never going to be able to dance again. The dance teacher felt Arlys had the right vibe to perform as Annie, and the vocal coach was very impressed with her abilities. Arlys loves to sing inspirational songs so she chose “Sweet Dreams are Made of This”. How this is inspiring is beyond me.

    Arlys comes out with short orange hair wearing a men’s suit and carrying a small whip. Her outfit definitely looks like Annie, but Arlys’s face does not. I find her eyes are made to look a lot bigger than Annie’s actually are. There are dancers writhing on the stage as Arlys adds a very dramatic feel to the performance. She truly exudes confidence. Her singing is also very good although she doesn’t sound a lot like Annie.

    Arlys receives an 8.75 for Vocal ability/Performance technique, which puts her in third behind Darren. I truly feel the judges were wrong on this one.

    Carmel Helene

    Carmel likes to write and sing. She admires Toni Braxton because she brings so much emotion to her singing. The vocal coach feels Carmel sings too much through her nose and does not have a natural sense of rhythm. Carmel hopes to capture the sultriness Toni brings to her performances.

    Carmel decides to sing “Unbreak My Heart” dedicating it to a past boyfriend that died. She wears the white dress Toni wore to the Grammy’s one year. I truly admire her guts to wear such a revealing dress, and I believe she did it more justice than Toni herself. She stands at a microphone stand with thousands of roses behind her. The song starts out a little too low for her and she seems to be a little flat. She does not look too much like Toni, but as the song heads towards a higher register, she definitely belts it out like Ms. Braxton. I found the second half of this performance to be very good even though there was not a lot of moving around. This will be a close race.

    Carmel receives an 8.84 for Vocal ability/Performance technique. Some judge actually gave her an 8.00! I seriously don’t understand the reasoning behind that, and for once I wish the judges would explain themselves.

    When we come back from the break Todd reveals the results.

    5th Place with an average of 8.41 Lenny Hirsch (Garth Brooks)

    Tonight, though, we have a three-way tie for second place! See, I knew it was close.
    Knocked off in no particular order with an average score of 8.83
    Carmel Helene (Toni Braxton)
    Darren Tolliver (Meatloaf)
    Arlys Alford (Annie Lennox)

    1st Place with an average score of 8.98 is Jessica Keenan (Madonna).

    Jessica sings us out and for the first time I feel the judges made the right decision. Although I truly enjoyed Annie Lennox and Toni Braxton, I am reminded how much I enjoyed Jessica’s carefree performance.

    For questions or comments please email the author at greenie@fansofrealitytv.com
    Who shot who in the what now?

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    Loaded God Complex MajiH's Avatar
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    Oh, Greenie! LOL I feel, for the first time, they made the wrong decision. Jessica was subpar at best and seemed so out of breath at the end of that song. Ugh! What a disappointing show this is turning out to be! The makeovers are HIDEOUS. They've got to pitch more money into that and, for God's sake, get a new host. Ew.

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    I was thinking last night as I watched moments of this show that the women, after they are all made up, look like female impersonators. Perhaps it has to do with the ultra-cheap Dollar General wigs.

    The Annie Lennox one...she...um. How to say this without sounding weird...she did a good job of looking like Annie considering she is not of the same race.

    I'm not sure who I think should have won since I didn't see all the performances but I wasn't all that impressed with the Toni Braxton gal. After the singing coach said she has nasal singing problems that's ALL I could hear when she sang.

    Personally, I wish they'd keep the vocal coach's comments off-air. He really ruins...well, there wasn't much to ruin in the first place...but it makes it less...um. Something. You know what I mean.
    "Ashleigh": I just think it's sleazy. It's dirty.
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    I forgot! Greenie! I still think you deserve some sort of hazard pay, or at least, free mental counseling after having to watch all the episodes of this show. And then making it amusing!

    Quote Originally Posted by Greenie
    Of course, it’s still incredibly boring with mostly brown leather, but I swear it’s the same.
    I have this theory that they can only get one audience so they've filmed all the episodes in one night. I can't IMAGINE why anyone would want to see this hooey live.
    "Ashleigh": I just think it's sleazy. It's dirty.
    Matt: Welcome to television!
    -The Joe Schmo Show

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    IMTribe IMTribe's Avatar
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    Kind words - thanks!

    Thanks for your kind words. Just an FYI: we did not choose the songs, the producers did. I auditioned with Alannis' "Uninvited". I would have preferred to sing a Peter Gabriel tune, but I felt the show would still give me a wonderful chance to be seen and heard. It also makes for a great demo reel!

    Peace and Best Wishes,
    Arlys
    Last edited by John; 09-10-2003 at 07:52 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by YCan'tAngieRead
    I forgot! Greenie! I still think you deserve some sort of hazard pay, or at least, free mental counseling after having to watch all the episodes of this show. And then making it amusing!


    I have this theory that they can only get one audience so they've filmed all the episodes in one night. I can't IMAGINE why anyone would want to see this hooey live.
    I kinda agree with that theory. And a big to your comments on Greenie, she does a fantastic job, and I'm not just saying that cuz we're buds.
    I know someday you'll have a beautiful life, I know you'll be a star in somebody else's eyes... but why... why... why can't it be me?

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    Quote Originally Posted by IMTribe
    I would have preferred to sing a Peter Gabriel tune, but I felt the show would still give me a wonderful chance to be seen and heard.
    Now THERE'S a Performing As... that I would LOVE to see! A very non-masculine lady pulling off Peter Gabriel!
    "Ashleigh": I just think it's sleazy. It's dirty.
    Matt: Welcome to television!
    -The Joe Schmo Show

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    from Jessica

    Jessica would like to thank the person who reviewed her performance on this site, she really appreciates the positive and intuitve opinion.
    got to www.jessicakeenan.com for info on her next performance.
    Last edited by John; 09-12-2003 at 06:57 AM.

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    I think the 5th judge is a tough critique. ALmost every single time he gives the lowest score of the 5 judges.
    I like cheese!

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    I've noticed that. Either he/she gives a VERY high mark or a very low one. There seems to be no middle ground.

    The comments from the couple of contestants who've poked in here have got me wondering...maybe these people aren't really all that interested in "becoming" a specific star as much as they are in showcasing their vocal talents.

    Some of them obviously do want to become a certain star, but others not so much. And putting the "karaoke" style of the show aside, there have been some decent vocal performances of tough songs...Unbreak My Heart is a really, REALLY hard song, for example. It goes way, WAY lower than I can sing, and I was trained as a contralto (woman who sings low). The woman who sang it did marginal, really, but it's a danged hard song.

    So I'm not sure it's the performers' fault when they sound funny or in the wrong style. They may have not been aware of what they were getting into.

    That aside, someone shoot the wigmaster for this show.
    "Ashleigh": I just think it's sleazy. It's dirty.
    Matt: Welcome to television!
    -The Joe Schmo Show

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