Candor, you sure do display a great deal of insight into your situation. That's quite rare, IMO. My weight has fluctuated too, but most of my life I have been average, even on the thin side some of the time. I felt like I deserved the best then and when I was heavier. At least I really think I did. lol
Those on this show seem to almost always suffer from some childhood trauma or have some very dysfunctional family situation. But, I also notice that many have husbands and boyfriends who seem to be committed to them.