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Thread: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

  1. #21
    O.Snap! JosephD's Avatar
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    Re: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

    Quote Originally Posted by causingchaos View Post
    ....So yeah that's enough to put anyone happy or not on the verge of tears. No one in the world wants to be continually harassed about their failings regardless of who it is under the guise of people caring about you.
    Harassed? Did you really feel like her dad was harassing her? He didn't yell. He didn't cuss. He didn't say anything disrespectful or demeaning towards her. I thought he kept his tone in check. If what her dad said is what brought her nearly to tears, and not what I suggested (that she's not actually as happy as she wants us to believe she is), then maybe she shouldn't be living at home with her parents. It isn't likely that her dad is going to change his ways, so if Whitney can't accept him the way he is, then why put herself in the situation of being faced with that every day? She's only setting herself up for disappointment, which she may later use are an excuse for not losing weight, since she's already dropped that hint.... "If I had dad's support, I could do it."

    I don't pretend to be an expert at generational stuff, but drawing off my own experiences with my own dad, I've had to accept certain things I cannot change. He's older (48) and somewhat set in his ways. I don't have to like some of his views, but I respect them, and especially when I'm visiting. After all, it's his home. Don't get me wrong, my dad is cool and we have a lot of fun -- but he does have his moments. When my dad first found out my BF is Greek, he had some issues with that. Oddly, he didn't have a problem with my BF being male, it was him being Greek that bothered my dad. My BF has ethnic Middle Eastern looks. Couple that with the fact that he's an Air Traffic Controller and my dad thought I'd done gone and lost my mind. But I didn't press the issue. I let dad think what he wanted to think. I let him work it out for himself. In time he came to realize that not every Middle Easterner wants to fly a plane into a building. They're best buddies now. We visit my parents and it's like I'M the outsider. Dad and Brandon head to the basement to play pool (something I never quite got the hang of). And mom and me talk in the kitchen.
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  2. #22
    FORT Fogey causingchaos's Avatar
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    Re: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

    She should move. I'm not arguing that. Harassment isn't just yelling or cussing either. So yes I do see her as continually being harassed about her weight. I'm using the term in a literary way and not a legal way as a behavior intended to upset. And it's working. She is getting upset. And it's not helping her.

    If you had someone who you cared about pointing out your failing constantly it doesn't matter how happy you that person would drive you to tears. It doesn't matter the tone they use.
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  3. #23
    FORT Fogey Debb70's Avatar
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    Re: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

    Oh, I agree that Whitney is very immature for her age. It's almost as if she's still a teen. I think it says a lot about their family dynamics. It's very common for families who have the resources to overindulge and carry the kids along for a while. Apparently, that happened with Whitney, but she's trying to get her act together, so I'll hang around.

    At least she got herself a tv show. For someone who is unemployed, that had to be a nice pay check for a few weeks of work.

    Obviously, Whitney's dad wants his daughter to be happy, but his words will not help, IMO. All that uninvited advice about weight loss is not going to help her. She has to want it and make the move herself. If he consulted with an expert, they would likely tell him that. It is his house though. He could tell her to lose weight or move out. That's pretty cold, but that's really his only option if he feels that strongly about it.

    And i do not believe that Whitney is that happy. I know what she says, but I think it's a veneer. I do think she's a positive person who has undergone a lot of personal growth, but I don't think she's happy with herself. That's just my take on it. I do enjoy watching her and the show though. She has a infectious laugh and they all crack me up. It's my current favorite reality show.

    Whitney was on Dr. Oz last week. She tried to teach him some dance moves!!!!!!!! OMG. Too funny.
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    FORT Fogey hot_chocolate's Avatar
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    Re: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

    Quote Originally Posted by JosephD View Post
    She also needs way too much attention. Yes, I know it's her show, but I couldn't believe how she behaved toward her friend Todd when they were dancing for her parents and Todd veered a little off course from they're scripted routine. He barely improvised and she completely stopped dancing, shut down, and yes, sulked again. Then, when he asked her what was wrong, she 'called him out' for trying to embarrass her, and all the while she was completely oblivious to the fact that her over reaction was embarrassing to him. This, from a 30 year old!?
    I didn't like that either. Very immature and petty. I agree that it does seem like she's overcompensating about how happy/confident she is. I want to be sympathetic to a point because I'm sure some parts of her life are very difficult and it must be terribly frustrating for anyone to gain weight due to a medical condition they can't control. To me she's a little over-the-top about everything and to me that can be off-putting.
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    Re: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

    Quote Originally Posted by hot_chocolate View Post
    I didn't like that either. Very immature and petty. I agree that it does seem like she's overcompensating about how happy/confident she is. I want to be sympathetic to a point because I'm sure some parts of her life are very difficult and it must be terribly frustrating for anyone to gain weight due to a medical condition they can't control. To me she's a little over-the-top about everything and to me that can be off-putting.
    I definitely agree that she seems to be overcompensating. It feels like "Look how much FUN I'm having!"

    I was embarrassed for her and for her friend when she had that little meltdown. It was so childish.

    Also, while I'm sure PCOS does make is easier to gain weight and harder to lose weight, I don't think she's truly doing as much as she could do to keep from gaining weight. The only two times we saw her eat in that first episode, it was bacon and pizza....and she made reference to ordering pizza (it was how she met Buddy - that's his name, right?) and planning to do it in the future. When you have the additional challenge of a disease like PCOS, eating that sort of stuff causes even more weight gain than in people without it. I'm not judging her for eating anything, but I don't think she's being honest if she says she's really trying to lose weight.

    I didn't see her father's comments as mean or cruel; it just felt like a concerned father expressing his love, albeit a bit ineptly.
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  6. #26
    Red Sox Nation Brooks's Avatar
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    Re: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

    When she was on Dr. Oz did she discuss how she intended to lose weight?

  7. #27
    FORT Fogey Debb70's Avatar
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    Re: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

    You never know how much is true on a reality show, but if Whitney is right and her parents keep no food in the house, only soup and sandwich stuff, that really makes me wonder. If your daughter is that obese, wouldn't it be a good motivator to have the house full of good, nutritious food? ( There is someone in my family who is very obese, but I believe he's probably malnourished. He doesn't really eat actual food, only things that I call fake food. His daily meals involve processed takeout food or things from cartons that have about 45 chemicals in them.) IMO, it would likely help Whitney if she started adding good foods to her diet and not focus so much on what she shouldn't have, but what is healthful to her. Her dad tried to do this.

    I saw how Whitney can't even shave the backs of her legs and how she has to wear spanx all the time to prevent chub rub. That must be painful. The more we see, the more we can tell that Whitney is really suffering. She spends so much time on dealing with her limitations due to obesity, that she has little time to do much else.

    I did enjoy seeing her teaching dance again. Her students seemed touched by her spirit and example.

    I liked the fashion show too. I thought the ladies all looked good. It was nice her parents showed their support.
    Last edited by Debb70; 01-21-2015 at 01:36 PM.

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    Re: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

    Quote Originally Posted by Debb70 View Post
    You never know how much is true on a reality show, but if Whitney is right and her parents keep no food in the house, only soup and sandwich stuff, that really makes me wonder. If your daughter is that obese, wouldn't it be a good motivator to have the house full of good, nutritious food? ( There is someone in my family who is very obese, but I believe he's probably malnourished. He doesn't really eat actual food, only things that I call fake food. His daily meals involve processed takeout food or things from cartons that have about 45 chemicals in them.) IMO, it would likely help Whitney if she started adding good foods to her diet and not focus so much on what she shouldn't have, but what is healthful to her. Her dad tried to do this.

    I saw how Whitney can't even shave the backs of her legs and how she has to wear spanx all the time to prevent chub rub. That must be painful. The more we see, the more we can tell that Whitney is really suffering. She spends so much time on dealing with her limitations due to obesity, that she has little time to do much else.

    I did enjoy seeing her teaching dance again. Her students seemed touched by her spirit and example.

    I liked the fashion show too. I thought the ladies all looked good. It was nice her parents showed their support.
    Why is it their responsibility? Yes, it would be considerate to have healthier foods in the house, but as Whitney has reminded us several times, she's 30 years old. That's certainly old enough to get herself to the store and buy other, healthier foods. Her complaining about the food in the house and blaming her parents seems like a convenient way to ignore any personal responsibility in the situation. Her parents don't seem to have weight problems and if her mom likes soup, so what? It's not like soup is junk food of anything.

    BTW - banana and mayonnaise sandwich? That sounds f-ing disgusting.

    I think Whitney may be in the stage of wanting to lose weight, but not at the stage where she's really ready to do something about it. I'm not judging her for that; if you're not ready, you're not ready. She's getting back into dancing, which is great and would cause most people to lose weight, but as we've learned, she needs to do more.

    Buddy certainly seems devoted to her. I wonder what happened there.

    I still feel like a lot of Whitney's big personality is masking a lot of sadness. It's the old "I'll make fun of myself before you can" thing. I definitely felt that when she was reading all of those nasty comments and laughing about it. Personally, I just wouldn't want to read those things. Maybe it fuels her determination, but if someone said those sorts of things about me, I wouldn't be able to get out of bed in the morning.
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  9. #29
    Only old on the outside! AZChristian's Avatar
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    Re: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

    Many years ago, I was put on an anti-depressant. To say that the warning "may cause weight gain" was an understatement IS an understatement. I doubled in size. I am not exaggerating. I was close to 300 pounds. I spent 8 months laying on the couch, eating and watching television. Had I just been on the couch, I doubt I would have gained that much weight. But when you take in more calories than you burn up, you gain weight. And I was taking in a LOT more calories than I was burning up.

    I had tried several times to get off of it, but between causing a flare-up of the depression and a bunch of other withdrawal issues, I always went back to it.

    Finally, I found myself in a calm place in my life, did my research, and weaned myself off of the medication. My doctor (now my former doctor) said, "Just cut it in half for two weeks, and then you can quit." Yeah, right. I took 5 MONTHS to wean slowly. There were still withdrawal issues, but I got off of it.

    The week after I cut the medication the first time (1 pill one day, 1/2 pill the next for the first two weeks), my appetite dropped off. In the old days, if I was out to dinner with friends, I'd be wishing I had the nerve to ask if I could clean their plates after finishing my own food. When I cut the pills, I'd go out to eat and my brain would say, "You're full; you don't even have to finish everything on your plate." And I'd push my plate away. I didn't start exercising at first. When you're carrying around twice the body weight you should be, it's hard to even want to walk much.

    I've said all that to say this. It sucks to be obese. Medications CAN exacerbate the situation, but no one is that large unless they're eating way too much of the wrong stuff. Good habits CAN replace bad habits, but only if a definitive choice is made. If she'd reach for carrot sticks instead of pizza, she'd probably start craving those carrot sticks instead of pizza.

    Do I still struggle with my weight? You bet. I have to be conscious of my food intake and my activity level every day. But to quote something I saw on a sign, "Nothing tastes better than being thin feels." I would probably change that a bit; I don't think "thin" should be our goal. Being healthy is our goal, and obesity is not healthy.

    I wish Whitney the best.
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  10. #30
    FORT Fogey Debb70's Avatar
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    Re: My Big Fat Fabulous Life (TLC)

    That's an inspiring story AZ! You've really been through it. Congratulations on your accomplishments. I've always watched my weight, but never had the medication issue you describe. I can't imagine how challenging that must be. I'm still trying to lose more weight. Yay, I did lose another pound last week! Not much, but still, I'm going in the right direction and I'm not doing anything drastic that I know I won't stick with. I'm just trying to make good choices, have moderate portions and move more. I am thinking of doing a jump start plan for 2 weeks. I think that is reasonable.

    The responsibility of the weight loss is up to Whitney, but I'm just saying that when your beloved daughter is living in your home, is obviously suffering with mental and physical pain and you want to help her to the point you are doing a tv show with her, then I would think that stocking the house with good nutritious food would be a given. It's not their job to do it, but I would think it would be instinctual.

    Banana and mayonnaise sandwiches are very popular and traditional in the south, especially in NC. It's probably one of those things you had to grow up on to appreciate. lol

    I think Whitney said that her male friend was one time a love interest, but it didn't work out, so they became great friends. I wonder if that might turn around by the end of the season. Of course, it's likely he was paid by TLC to play that role. I'm very suspicious of reality tv.

    I agree that Whitney makes jokes about herself first, so others won't get the chance. Some of them are funny and crack me up, but if you look at them as a whole and it seems kind of sad. I still like the show and hope it does well.
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