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After seeing the promos for this show, I just couldn't bring myself to watch it and I, shamefully, watch a lot of trashy tv. But there's just something so wrong about it. I have also never watched "Big Love" either.
Way down on my list of things I don't like about this situation is my utter disbelief that many women can happily share one man. Seems so contrary to the nature of women. I'm sure being raised with this makes it more acceptable to the women but it still amazes me.
I feel obligated to post here, mostly because these are my neighbors. Well, not next-door-on-the-same-street neighbors...but they live close by. I'm not nearly as bothered by their polygamist lifestyle as I am about how giddy they all seem to be to be on tv. The short part of it I could stand to watch was like watching adolsecents amped up on caffeine. Settle down, people. We get it. You sleep with the same guy in the same house. So what? It was like no one had ever paid attention to them before. And the husband? What the hell was he on? I thought the enthusiasm over sharing one man was way over-the-top - the whole thing was sketchy to me. And forced.
The husband says he wants to share his lifestyle with people at work, and not live in secrecy anymore. Best get looking for another job then, pal. I mean...obviously they are not the FLDS people, but they are still shunned by the "regular" mormons. And these families are not sequestered to a compound in an unpopulated area. This is a SLC suburb.
I realize I'm dissing my fellow Utahns here....but the show is lame and sketchy. I don't think it will take much to toss those sister-wives over the edge and send them scattering in different directions. Assuming they can remember which kids belong to whom.
I watched this first episode. I found it interesting that they self described themselves as Fundamentalist Mormons. A bit later the moms in describing what they wanted for their children described "letting the choose", that flies in the face of being a Fundamentalist Mormon. If you are observant of your faith and you are a Christian you do not hope for your children to make up their own minds you bring them up in your faith. I do think Mormons consider themselves Christians so I am confused by these seemingly contradictory statements. Maybe someone can clarify.
The point someone made about public aid is important, who is paying for the health care of these families? We aren't just talking about being on the WIC program and receiving cheese and dairy, or food stamps but medical care. I am bothered that this is intentional abuse of the welfare system but is being presented as a wholesome family with good values being passed on to the children.
One other thing I noticed was wife three, she wanted to be # three. I think she really wanted to live in an actual extended family, with cousins and aunties and great aunts all working together. Gee I would like that too, community is a great thing.
I don't know. I'm not a polygamist. Wasn't raised in the culture. Never been to Utah. And I "don't play well with others." There are so many personal strikes for me against polygamy.
But having said that, I always kind of felt like the wives are getting the better deal than the husband. Usually when discussion starts about shows like this or Big Love, the implication is the husband has his "harem" and is "getting lucky" whenever possible. But so much of any marriage is not about sex or procreation. It's about going to the grocery store, dropping the kids off places, remembering to buy toilet paper and eggs and milk and making dinner or packing school lunches. Stuff that I don't like being the only one responsible to do. And if I had an extra person or two and we shared the burden, I might just think I won the lottery. In theory at least.
Yes, this family might have seemed giddy. To me, they seemed awkward and nervous. And maybe scared and uncomfortable either in front of the camera or sharing their story. As I would be. I didn't feel like it was a giddiness about the perfection of "the lifestyle." Frankly, that is the term that made me feel uncomfortable because I've only heard the term in reference to swinging. LOL!
It's not for me. And it's not for my daughters. But these appear to be consenting adults who chose this. Which is different to me and I feel it unfair to paint them with the same brush as Warren Jeffs or to assume they receive government assistance.
So I'm going to keep watching for now at least.
So . . . . how much money are they likely to be receiving for simply doing this show?
If they have an "income", shouldn't their public aid by cut off?
Hoping someone investigates this.
Actually, the whole "public aid" part of this thread has not been validated - at least as it applies to this family. We don't know if they receive public assistance.Quote:
Originally Posted by Little Sew&Sew;4071639;
Personally, I kind of doubt it. One visit by a social worker to their upscale residence would have them disqualified, I'd think.
I would have to agree, I don't think this family is on public aid. The husband seemed to have a good job, wife #2 worked a full-time job, and wife #1 may have worked also. Wife #3 stayed home and cared for the kids so you have no child care expenses there.Quote:
Originally Posted by Poppy Fields;4071655;
Don't get me wrong, I think this whole situation is creepy and degrading to women. I understand that these women choose to go into this on their own, but it still seems so wrong to me.
I would also have to agree with others that they all seemed so awkward on camera. Hopefully that will change over the weeks and the show continues.
The principle of plural marriage was dropped as doctrine because of political reasons. It was necessary for the survival of their church and, some would argue, the granting of statehood to Utah. When these parents say they are "fundamentalists," I think they mean that they still hold fast to the belief that "The Principle" is divine revelation. Their children are free to choose whether or not they will live as adults in that particular way.Quote:
Originally Posted by Candybar;4071496;
I think that all people of faith realize that mature faith is based on an individual decision and a commitment at some point in the lives of their children. We hope they commit themselves to the faith we have raised them in. But the "choice" is necessary. Without it, they are just spouting and parroting what they were taught. With it, they choose and truly embrace a spiritual path.
Our oldest son is a devout member of the Society of Friends. Our yougest is a devout Bhuddist. Neither chose the faith they were reared in. Both are happy in their choices.
thank you!Quote:
Originally Posted by holly in socal;4070570;
I just read on CNN that the family is under investigation for bigamy. Not sure how that works since he's technically married to only one of the wives.