This is in response to some questions up thread.
When Kody first married Robyn all they talked about was getting them all under one roof, because she lived across town at the time. I did get the feeling they wanted to be in one house because that's what they talked about. Then they moved to Vegas. When that happened, they couldn't find anywhere big enough for them all to live so they had to get separate houses. They got used to that and didn't want to go back to one house.
Although, I have heard that in their tell all book, that Meri and Christine had issues years ago and could not share a kitchen. Really, well how was that working before they left Utah? They were sharing a kitchen then, right? Maybe someone who has read the book can chime in. Recall that issue coming up this season when they went on vacation with that Dargur family? Meri was crying on that kitchen sharing comment.
It was Meri and Janelle who had the issues. Meri was downright cruel to Janelle and got away with the bullying because Janelle didn't feel she could stand up for herself.
Regarding the kitchens, there was a large kitchen where the family took their meals together. However, rumor has it that Meri (who liked to eat healthier) prepared her own meals and would send her daughter to eat with the children of Janelle and Christine. Rumor further has it that J & C, as "single mothers" qualified for food stamps as well as other government assistance, and those funds were probably also used to feed the "legal" family of Kody, Meri and Mariah.
There was - and is - a lot of shady stuff going on regarding the Browns' finances. There's a very informative blog online about the sister wives with lots of information about their new homes, and even one page where they talk about the things that they said before which are diametrically opposed to what they're saying now. (Like, "we all want to be together in one house" versus "to have two of my wives sharing a kitchen is considered abusive."
I'm not one to judge other people's life choices, but if they're going to publicize those choices and bring them into our homes, I sure think we have a right to comment on them.
Thanks for that info.
Ok how does one abuse someone with a Kitchen?
By forcing them to cook AND wash the dishes in the same day :)
My understanding is that Meri's way is the only way. She thought the dishes should go in a certain place. Janelle (whose kitchen it was also) had no say. Janelle thought that it was okay to leave the dishes in the sink after dinner, with the intent of washing them in the morning. Meri wanted them done right away (probably with the understanding that JANELLE would do them right away). There was no compromise.
To insist that EVERYTHING has to be one to the demands of one person can, in fact, be bullying. I'd want the dishes done right away, too - but it should have been possible to address it without being demanding. If nothing else, Meri could have done them herself and not whined about it. But we've seen that Meri doesn't do ANYTHING without whining.
It was Meri's kitchen first so I can see how she may have certain ways of doing things. What I am not sure of is why grown women can't just do their own dishes and let the other wife handle her own stuff.
Granted I didn't take notes on the book and I certainly didn't retain a bunch of the information in it like details and what not... But here's my take on it and why when I see the show or come here I sometimes have issues.
The book clearly paints these people as living separate lives by choice. So you have the show saying that they're one big family and we share all these finances and whatever and the book clearly saying at one point that they prefer to keep all their finances separate. All these wives have their "own" money and the money only combines when one of the wives can't make ends meet and then it's not all the money. Basically the other wives just hand over a little to float them and then back to everything being separate again.
As for the house thing that's another thing I can't wrap my mind around. From the get go in the book it is made clear that these women are really not able to cohabitate. they do not like to see each other having moments with Kody (kissing, hand holding etc.). And then there's the kitchen thing. Janelle and Meri from the get go had kitchen issues and Christine didn't really help that at all. They also have varying levels of house keeping and care for personal possessions in general. And different diets that they tend to adhere to. Which against fascinates me because, in theory, for people who adhere to Mormonism so much that they would engage in plural marriage they sure play fast and loose with stuff like diet and my continual confusion about the wet bar (in theory no drinking should be going down either). But that's neither here nor there.
In the book Janelle and Christine were basically interlopers on Meri and Kody's marriage. Kody could not have been more indifferent to Janelle and Christine if he tried. His behavior combined with Meri's treatment of them and their frankly different lifestyles (Meri was flippant about keeping jobs and money and just didn't care about making ends meet for example while Janelle kind of did) is what drove them to different houses. Janelle at one point lived some distance away and was apparently pretty happy with that arrangement. Janelle and Christine apparently do fine when they live together but not so much with Meri but Janelle and Christine have also been raising a pack of similarly aged children. When I read the book I saw basically Meri and Kody in a relationship and Janelle and Christine in a close friendship more than I saw Kody and all his merry sister wives. So when I see the show and they talk of everyone living together I can't figure out where the lie is. Was it in the book where they detailed why that was such an epic failure or is on the show?
Same with finances. I can't figure out where the lie is because it has to be there. Either you have trouble with money or not. I have a steady job and it was like an act of congress for me to get a $40k (yup just $40k) loan to buy a house. For all intents and purposes these people are not employed, constantly complainging about finances... And yet...
They paint a picture in the book that you have Kody of a bunch of individuals who just happen to be in this situation without a lot of love between them and who prefer to remain apart and who kind of oblige Kody when he comes around which for some isn't really enough. Janelle and Christine (probably more so Christine) feel like they are there but not really in a relationship with Kody. It's very disturbing in the book to read about the lack of love or affection between them. But yet on TV here they are as a great big happy family when that's not what they present in the book.
I don't know. Things don't add up for me but I tend to lean more toward the book being true because you can see the lack of relationship with Kody and the wives that aren't Robin or to some extent Meri now on TV and you can see they don't get along necessarily that well either.