Hoarding: Buried Alive

[nanarama]

I have to say, Debb, I understand your points and your concern. However, if you've ever had to file to become a guardian, you'll know it isn't an easy, rubber-stamp type of thing. Having had to do it for a parent who suffered from dementia, I can tell you that, at least in my state it is pretty difficult. (And rightfully so.) The state may agree to give guardianship or it may decide that, with counseling, the party can continue to manage their own affairs.
I'm sure in many extreme cases, guardianship might be the answer. I've also seen that, on this show we're discussing, remarkable things have been accomplished through counseling. Perhaps publicity of this illness and showing it can be conquered throuh the proper therapy, is a good step in the right direction for individuals and families who are suffering through it.

[Debb70]

I'm sure states vary on what proof you need to have someone declared incompetent. In my area, I have seen several cases. I believe that if the presiding court official, (we have a clerk of court who presides,) sees photos of the extreme hoarding where you have rats and dead animal carcasses in the rubble, you would win the guardianship. Also, doctors sometimes intervene and report the case to Adult Protective Services. They investigate and if the person is in danger of their health they file the petition to take control. As a family member, all you can do is try.

I think I have seen only a couple of sucess stories on these types of cases. I hope there are many more that I haven't seen.

I know that I have learned a lot from watching these shows. I always thought the hoarding stemmed from laziness. I never knew it was a mental illness. It has taught me to feel much more compassion for them.

[Brandy]

After the Northridge 'quake, a story came out about a couple who had been killed, not because their house caved in but because they had floor to ceiling boxes in front of their bed, and it crushed them.

The story said they had 'kept meaning to' put the boxes in storage, or sort through them but hadn't got around to it yet. The couple was fairly young - I think he was 40 and she was in her 30s?

The 'quake hadn't even been that strong in their area, but strong enough to topple unsecured household things, which included the wall of boxes. Something about that story stuck with me and I just never want to let anything get that out of control in my life. Something so symbolic about your junk coming back to get you. And, I mean, how tragic. Those people are gone forever.

[val123elephant]

I see there are two new episodes airing Monday night.

[Brandy]

Thanks, val...this show is heartbreaking yet hopeful at the same time. It seems as if they want to actually teach the clients a better way to live.

Did anyone see the episode with the 50 year old man? He was living in an apartment, and was deciding whether to move back in with his mother (also a hoarder.) His parents were both still living, were divorced and the father was a taskmaster, who wasn't very affectionate to his son growing up, the son said.

The 50 year old man seemed like such a gentle, humble soul. It seemed he was suffering from 'scruples' or another way to phrase it might be perfectionism. He never felt good enough. So everything had to be just perfect before he could get rid of it, put it away, recycle it, etc. He kept washing empty bottles and his own hands. I felt so bad for him.

I hope the show does a follow up and I hope he's found friends and love in life.

[val123elephant]

I saw that one Brandy. I too would like to see a special follow up show on all of these cases.

[Brandy]

Did you see the episode with the guy dating this kind of fakey blonde woman? And she had never been to his home, until the episode filmed? When she saw his hoarding she broke up with him. What did you all think of that episode.

[Little Sew&Sew]

I need organization, plain and simple. As I get older, I find I need it even more so as the memory occasionally fails me. If I put something in the same place every time, there really isn't a need to run around the house looking for it.

With that being said, I can say I don't blame her for breaking up with him.

HOWEVER . . . she seemed rather cold and unsympathetic about the whole thing. Yes, he was a hoarder, but it wasn't like he had just told her he had an STD!!

[swissmiss150]

Did you see the episode with the guy dating this kind of fakey blonde woman? And she had never been to his home, until the episode filmed? When she saw his hoarding she broke up with him. What did you all think of that episode.

Amazingly enough, I read a follow-up on that channel's blog, and the couple has NOT broken up - at least as of several months ago.

[libgirl2]

It has to be hard beginning a relationship with someone and then seeing that. In the back of my mind I would be thinking that if this goes serious and we marry this will be a constant struggle and would I want to live with this?