Ruby

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Originally Posted by Imperfect1

I find the situation with Denny to be extremely poignant and touching. I can completely understand Ruby's part in it: Being 700+ pounds, and 'with' Denny for many years, Denny was not only the love of her life, but he was the only man in her life, and was very likely the only man who was EVER going to be in her life. Not only that, he was genuinely attractive, and very seductive to her, and apparently he made her believe that he really loved her and would marry her someday, if she lost the weight. I think that Ruby was in love with him and still is, and she is mad and hurt by, what she believes to be a huge betrayal, coupled with the fact that she doesn't believe that any other man will ever be in love with her.

What I don't understand is Denny's part in all of this. He genuinely seems to be attracted to her to a certain extent --- and participates in all the flirting and kissing and whatever --- but I don't think he has a clue how fragile Ruby's love for him was and still is. Although he apparently never really meant all the things he told her and promised her about getting married, he did stay around for years and even now, comes in and out of her life, not just as a plutonic friend, but as something more --- We've seen for ourselves on camera how flirtatious he is with her and how complimentary and all --- but I just can't figure out what is going on in his head, that he doesn't realize that it is so wrong to toy with her the way many men often toy with women's affections.

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I think he does know, but doesn't care. He seems to get off on the attention - both from her and the cameras. I think he's totally insensitive. If Jeff and Georgia, Ruby's closest friends, have trouble trusting him, there's a reason. The fact that he repeatedly says hurtful things to her and she keeps going back for more is just mind boggling. Not only does she need to be in therapy for the childhood issues so she can remember her past and face it, she needs to deal with it so she can work on her self-esteem, so she'll stop going back for more punishment from Denny.

Maya Angelou was right: "The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them." Denny has shown her again and again and she doesn't believe it.

Ruby's NEVER, EVER gonna move ahead in the love department as long as Denny's in her orbit or in her mix or as long as he can keep his mug on the show. Their relationship is waaay too complicated for Ruby to ever just look at Denny as a platonic friend no matter what she says.

Denny could very well handle the "friends" aspect of their relationship but no way in hellicoptor is Ruby ever going to be able to untangle the mess she calls their friendship, relationship however the heck she's choosing to define it these days. I don't buy it when Ruby says she and Denny will only be platonic friends in the future. Her head's too screwed up regarding Denny to be able to "stay in her own backyard". No way.

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Originally Posted by beesknees

Ruby's NEVER, EVER gonna move ahead in the love department as long as Denny's in her orbit or in her mix or as long as he can keep his mug on the show. Their relationship is waaay too complicated for Ruby to ever just look at Denny as a platonic friend no matter what she says.

Denny could very well handle the "friends" aspect of their relationship but no way in hellicoptor is Ruby ever going to be able to untangle the mess she calls their friendship, relationship however the heck she's choosing to define it these days. I don't buy it when Ruby says she and Denny will only be platonic friends in the future. Her head's too screwed up regarding Denny to be able to "stay in her own backyard". No way.

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Ruby's in love with Denny, and he's not in love with her. (And sadly, even if/when Ruby loses the weight, he will still not be in love with her.) Almost all of us have been in that situation, and it's really, really painful. But the difference for MOST of us is that we believe, that some time in the future, we'll meet someone else and be happily in love. But to Ruby, that isn't ever going to happen --- so it's doubly painful and difficult for her to let go of Denny.

I stopped watching this show and come by to see how she is doing. Anyone know what the ratings are? This seems to be turning out to be more about a day in the life of an obese woman with no goal of weight loss or mental health!

How long has this show been on? Two years? Doesn't seem like she has lost that much weight. I guess if she reaches her goal her show would be over, so she will probably let it drag out another 2 or 3 years.

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Originally Posted by shoepie

I stopped watching this show and come by to see how she is doing. Anyone know what the ratings are? This seems to be turning out to be more about a day in the life of an obese woman with no goal of weight loss or mental health!

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I don't know what the "ratings" are, but Ruby seems to be quite popular. And, even if this actually was a show about just "a day in the life of an obese woman" ---- what would be wrong with that???????? Ruby is fun and quirky and interesting and I enjoy watching her. (It's certainly better than all the 'mean girl' and 'low life' shows that are so popular now!)

BUT the actual fact is that what you assume is actually incorrect. If you watched every week you'd see that Ruby is struggling very hard with her weight issues --- and like most obese people, has many ups and downs, successes and defeats. But each time she has a defeat, she somehow manages to pick herself up and continue on with her goal. She has, after all, lost over 350 lbs --- no small achievement!

She's also struggling very hard with her mental health issues, and they cause her a lot of pain! She is seeing not one but SEVERAL thereapists who are helping her remember the trauma or abuse that happened to her when she was a child, and to deal with the other issues in her life.

I stand corrected.

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Originally Posted by shoepie

I stand corrected.

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No problem, shoepie. A couple of the recent episodes focused more on Ruby's general life than on her struggles, so I could see how one could make that assumption. Don't know if you watched the most recent episode. She's back in serious, hard core weight training mode now and, in a session with her pastor, she had a major breakthrough in her memories of her childhood trauma. Although they intentionally didn't reveal on tv the exact nature of what happened, we can assume it was some kind of sexual abuse because her pastor gave her a 'workbook' to help her work through her issues, and the title included the words "sexual abuse." I hope that Ruby will be able to heal from her past experiences. I know that finally admitting what happened is a huge step forward, but healing from something like that is very, very hard.

I watched the first 2 seasons of this show. I stopped watching it after I realized that there was no point to this show. I didn't see a lot of weight loss happening but now I just read that she gained 60 pounds back! What? Now I really don't understand what the point of this show is. No offense is intended to those who were watching it regularly. I understand that she has other issues in her life but wasn't it supposed to be about weight loss? I just don't get it! And I think she is annoying too. Does she still talk in the baby voice? I was hoping to see a regular-sized Ruby by now.

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Originally Posted by RealityLovesMe

I watched the first 2 seasons of this show. I stopped watching it after I realized that there was no point to this show. I didn't see a lot of weight loss happening but now I just read that she gained 60 pounds back! What? Now I really don't understand what the point of this show is. No offense is intended to those who were watching it regularly. I understand that she has other issues in her life but wasn't it supposed to be about weight loss? I just don't get it! And I think she is annoying too. Does she still talk in the baby voice? I was hoping to see a regular-sized Ruby by now.

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Me too. It has turned into a day in the life of Ruby, which is fine but not of interest to me. I started watching and thought it would be exciting to see her metamorphasis. I anticipated her getting a lot of plastic surgery to get rid of her sagging skin and have a new life. I found her personality irritating so I stopped watching.