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Thread: Ruby

  1. #111
    Bitten Critical's Avatar
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    Re: Ruby

    Quote Originally Posted by libgirl2;3880120;
    I so got how hard it is to cook and see all that food and not have a taste! I really think her friends should have been more supportive and gone along with her healthier menu instead of making all the fattening things to tempt her. I would have eaten them all!
    I wonder if Georgia and Jeff and her other friends watched that episode and realized how much they enable Ruby. You're right - they should have done the healthy Thanksgiving....or at least not deep-fried that turkey. Georgia, in particular, seems to be in serious denial about how much she enables Ruby.

    On the other hand, Ruby was stuffing herself with food while they were preparing that dinner. Obviously, it's her issue, but her friends aren't doing her any favors.
    Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.' - Isaac Asimov

    I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

  2. #112
    FORT Fogey
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    Re: Ruby

    I think I'm torn on this issue. I don't think Ruby's friends should have to change their food habits when they are with Ruby. To me, it's unfair to expect someone without a weight issue to not eat what they want and enjoy - especially on Thanksgiving. When Ruby was insisting on not having pumpkin pie for Thanksgiving, I thought that was really unfair because pumpkin pie is iconic for Thanksgiving. (I realize the pie a small issue, but it would bother me if I couldn't have it on Thanksgiving!) Also, when they were grocery shopping, Jeff wanted to make mashed potatoes, but Ruby was insisting on having baked potatoes. I understand being supportive, but it's unfair for others to have to sacrifice things they enjoy. I'm a vegetarian, and I never expect others to prepare only vegetarian dishes when we eat together or order only vegetarian if we go out. Being a vegetarian is my choice, and I realize it's different than Ruby's health issue, but it still seems unfair for others to sacrifice. Georgia and Jeff had already made lots of sacrifices for a few years now (ex. Georgia mentioned they only went to places that had seats to fit Ruby, etc), and they did it because they care, but they shouldn't have to if they don't want to. I know people who have issues with alcohol, but they are okay with others drinking around them. It's a tough place to get to, no doubt, but not everyone has the same issues. So yes, I do understand being supportive, but I also think they should be able to do things/eat things that they enjoy.

  3. #113
    FORT Fogey libgirl2's Avatar
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    Re: Ruby

    Quote Originally Posted by daiseyo;3880306;
    I think I'm torn on this issue. I don't think Ruby's friends should have to change their food habits when they are with Ruby. To me, it's unfair to expect someone without a weight issue to not eat what they want and enjoy - especially on Thanksgiving. When Ruby was insisting on not having pumpkin pie for Thanksgiving, I thought that was really unfair because pumpkin pie is iconic for Thanksgiving. (I realize the pie a small issue, but it would bother me if I couldn't have it on Thanksgiving!) Also, when they were grocery shopping, Jeff wanted to make mashed potatoes, but Ruby was insisting on having baked potatoes. I understand being supportive, but it's unfair for others to have to sacrifice things they enjoy. I'm a vegetarian, and I never expect others to prepare only vegetarian dishes when we eat together or order only vegetarian if we go out. Being a vegetarian is my choice, and I realize it's different than Ruby's health issue, but it still seems unfair for others to sacrifice. Georgia and Jeff had already made lots of sacrifices for a few years now (ex. Georgia mentioned they only went to places that had seats to fit Ruby, etc), and they did it because they care, but they shouldn't have to if they don't want to. I know people who have issues with alcohol, but they are okay with others drinking around them. It's a tough place to get to, no doubt, but not everyone has the same issues. So yes, I do understand being supportive, but I also think they should be able to do things/eat things that they enjoy.
    But we have also seen them in the past bringing her food and treats etc.... I guess it really is a difficult situation. They could have healthied up some foods... mashed potatoes with chicken broth instead of milk.... etc.... WE made changes after my dad had his heart attack. Full fat potatoes hasn't been on the table since.
    "To err is human, to arr is a pirate"

  4. #114
    Mullet/Summer Enthusiast AshleyPSU's Avatar
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    Re: Ruby

    I guess I can see things both ways. On one hand, they should be supportive of Ruby and show they are on board with her weight loss journey by eating healthy at Thanksgiving. On the other hand, Thanksgiving is pretty much 1 of 2 holidays where I can stuff myself silly and not feel bad about it because it was a holiday. I don't think I'd be super happy about sacrificing tradition and my favorite foods because of one other person. It isn't Thanksgiving to me without stuffing and mashed potatoes. It's a tough situation.
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  5. #115
    FORT Fanatic ElizabethG's Avatar
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    Re: Ruby

    Quote Originally Posted by AshleyPSU;3880488;
    I guess I can see things both ways. On one hand, they should be supportive of Ruby and show they are on board with her weight loss journey by eating healthy at Thanksgiving. On the other hand, Thanksgiving is pretty much 1 of 2 holidays where I can stuff myself silly and not feel bad about it because it was a holiday. I don't think I'd be super happy about sacrificing tradition and my favorite foods because of one other person. It isn't Thanksgiving to me without stuffing and mashed potatoes. It's a tough situation.
    Totally agree with this...even though I may be trying to limit what I eat and all, at Thanksgiving or Christmas I would never dream of trying to get my family to forgo their favorite dishes just because of me. It is up to ME to make smart choices when confronted with a bounty of all different kinds of foods. Yes, very hard to do....but still my choice.
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  6. #116
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    Re: Ruby

    Quote Originally Posted by Critical;3880269;
    I wonder if Georgia and Jeff and her other friends watched that episode and realized how much they enable Ruby. You're right - they should have done the healthy Thanksgiving....or at least not deep-fried that turkey.
    Unless you eat the skin, the fried turkey is not any worse for you than a roasted one. The meat does not absorb the grease at all.

  7. #117
    FORT Fogey libgirl2's Avatar
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    Re: Ruby

    Quote Originally Posted by dancingfan;3881129;
    Unless you eat the skin, the fried turkey is not any worse for you than a roasted one. The meat does not absorb the grease at all.
    I was thinking that too. I think I even heard as long as you don't eat the skin its better for you!
    "To err is human, to arr is a pirate"

  8. #118
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    Re: Ruby

    Didn't Ruby say that she could taste the grease when eating that fried turkey? What are the odds that she removed the skin?
    Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.' - Isaac Asimov

    I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

  9. #119
    FORT Fogey causingchaos's Avatar
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    Re: Ruby

    I don't really watch this show and only passively know Ruby from other shows. Anyhow, reading back at the comments here I have a couple comments. I have eaten fried turkey and could taste the grease as well (skin was off at the time of frying). I don't eat a lot of fried foods though so that could be the reason why.

    I don't eat fish or seafood (due to allergies). The only time I make that an issue is when people have get togethers where I live since fish is a big food staple here and it's not unusual to have a fish based meal where I would be limited to just the potato (if I'm lucky). They do the same for buffets or weddings here too where they'll only have a fish protein and the potatoes. I don't expect people to change for me. Either just recognize people have different needs (low sodium, high protein, low fast etc.).

    Lastly I saw a comment discussing alcoholics and being around people who drink. Not all alcoholics will hang around people who drink. There are some people who are far enough along in their recovery where this isn't an issue anymore. But there are many who recognize their problem and are horribly uncomfortable about being around drinkers and are too scared to say anything. I know many who have felt obligated to go to a wedding and white knuckled it all the way through scared to death of all the alcohol around them. I would suspect Ruby is in some phase of her eating problem where she is still unable to be around all those tempting foods without just simply giving in.

    I can empathize with that. If you rolled a joint and started smoking it in front of me I would start having cravings and if I didn't leave the area would likely not be ok. I can be around all the pot heads in the world and be fine but if they're actively using in front of me I would be on shakey ground.

    So Ruby having an addiction to food she comes into some realities of her own. If her friends are going to essentially smoke the joint in front of her regardless of her inability to say no to the bad stuff she needs to question if those are really her friends. My friends wouldn't dream of putting me in a crappy position like that knowing I have a problem.

  10. #120
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    Re: Ruby

    I understand about Thanksgiving being an "eating holiday," but it's also about being with family and loved ones. My holiday isn't going to be ruined if the mashed potatoes are made with chicken broth instead of heavy cream. They didn't have to poach the turkey and have it with steamed vegetables, but it seems like there is a happy medium and dousing everything in butter isn't it.

    Sure, there are alcoholics that don't mind other people drinking in front of them, but Ruby definitely isn't at that place with her food addiction. While it's HER issue and her responsibility, it strikes me as pretty insensitive on the part of her friends to not make some allowances. They know that Ruby doesn't have her food addiction under control, so it's definitely enabling, imo, to have a bunch of unhealthy food around her. It felt to me like they lost their "drinking buddy" and were not all that unhappy that she fell off the wagon.

    Ruby is changing a lot through this process and that may not necessarily be comfortable for Jeff and Georgia, who are the people she relied on the most when she was less mobile. Now that she's changing, she doesn't need them as much on a daily basis.
    Anti-intellectualism has been a constant thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that democracy means that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.' - Isaac Asimov

    I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

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