The Duggar Family

[analisa_roche]

Many girls from big families do not go on to have large families of their own. Many do not have children at all because they have been through child-raising work already.

I am the eldest of six and did quite a lot of helping raise the younger ones. I have four now, and would love to have more if my husband (the younger of two) were willing.

[analisa_roche]

This family must have a huge carbon footprint.

I've seen this discussed elsewhere - maybe earlier in this thread? - but while they overall probably do have a large carbon footprint, their per-person footprint is likely *much* lower than the average American, given that they are very frugal. I love how they always buy used and carry no debt.

You will soon see that I have a ton of respect for this family, so most of my comments will be supportive of them. Regardless, I have been lurking in this discussion for a long time, and I really enjoy the discussions here.

[hutchlover]

Irregardless of their carbon footprint, they live in the USA and they have the right to have as many kids and raise them, the way THEY feel is most appropriate.

Obviously very few people would want that many kids, and that's their choice. But I don't think it's appropriate to condemn them for living the way they want, and not how someone else's choices would be. That includes having the older kids help raise the younger. I seen no complaining about it from any of the children and even cousin Amy, who lives more "normally" has no problem with it. That's just how the Duggars are and at least their kids aren't out creating havoc and they're not living off the government.

The only thing I do disagree with is Homeschooling, but that's because I'm no a proponent of homeschooling, period. Not that I think public schools are that much better, but I believe they're more important to a child & teen's well-roundedness.

[analisa_roche]

BTW--I understand that this is a religious issue for some--I grew up in that kind of religious atmosphere of large families for various "religious" reasons. I don't expect anyone to agree with me.

You beat me to it. I was going to mention this, which of course has also been mentioned here previously. I grew up in that kind of family as well, and although we have not practiced those beliefs to the extent my own parents did, I think they have a great deal of validity and I have so much respect for people who do practice them. As I said before, I would have gone that way as well had I not married someone who sees things differently. I have a cousin with 13 children and she is such an amazing mom.

[analisa_roche]

And I also see value in what the Duggars give back to the world - productive citizens with a spirit of service.

Well said - and I love your sig!

[analisa_roche]

I was raised Catholic, i had a rosery since i was born, along with a bible as christianing gifts lol. I went a catholic elementary school, which was pretty much same as a public school other then we said 'Our Father' or "Hail Mary" every morning after Oh Canada anthem. Prayed before Lunch.
Though i never wore uniforms. But we did have church once a month at the parish next to us.

I knew the Ten Commandments by the time I was 6. By the time i was 10, i already knew multiple ways which you bring you to hell. I like to call it GASS. For Gay, Abortion, and Suciside, and sex before marriage. Which you were suppose to avoid to make it into heaven
I remember quite well never being allowed to wear pants to church, and watching my grandmother on my mothers side who was a very religious women, though was not a preachy type, get ready for church, with her specially coiffed hair and pearls and jewelery and perfect make-up. while on my fathers, wasn't that religious and never went to church.. Actually my dad's mom was actually pissed at my mom for putting us into a catholic school, she wanted us in public.
I was allowed to wear what i wanted to wear whatever i wanted. though i was never allowed to dye my hair, or have any piercing other them my ears. I still get lecture about how my nose stud is destroying my 'temple'. Hair was never an issue, though i always prefered it long hair to short.
Though as a grew older I realised that i find Catholism very mind controlling and restricting and even somewhat hyprocritical. They Tell you God loves you for who you are, Or god made you who you are except if you this or that, or doing this and that.

So i don't think it really matters what religion you are, or brought up into. Its all the same, your brought up to agree and live that certain way. Whether you stay that way, or involve to something that you feels right to you Is up to you. A girl i knew in school was disowned from her family because she didn't want to be a jehovah witness, while in highschool.

With respect to your own experience, mine, as a cradle Catholic, has been entirely differnt. I find the Church to be the most important, most loving, most comforting, (and, yes, most demanding) thing in my life. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

[Wind Dancer]

Hi to all--quite honestly I don't see how talking about the possibility of people making informed choices about reproduction leads to the jump to asserting that we are trying to force something on someone else--"taking away their right to choose."

Perhaps I am msunderstanding the points being made by posts referring to "Forcing people" to do one tihng or another?

Thanks for any clarification on this.

[Wind Dancer]

Irregardless of their carbon footprint, they live in the USA and they have the right to have as many kids and raise them, the way THEY feel is most appropriate.

Obviously very few people would want that many kids, and that's their choice. But I don't think it's appropriate to condemn them for living the way they want, and not how someone else's choices would be. That includes having the older kids help raise the younger. I seen no complaining about it from any of the children and even cousin Amy, who lives more "normally" has no problem with it. That's just how the Duggars are and at least their kids aren't out creating havoc and they're not living off the government.

.

Hutchlover--hi, Of course we don't hear any of the older children complaining.

I was forced to take care of younger sibs for many hours a day. No one asked me if I wanted to do it--I was just told to do it.

It was difficult work and onerous. Do you know how hard it is for a child to get younger children to obey? Do you know how hard it is to change many diapers a day for a baby that is not yours while you yourself are still a child?

But did I complain? Of course not--I was a helpless child doing what the all-powerful adults told me to do.

Add the threat of "God's telling us this is how we must live and to disobey is a sin" and you won't hear a child even attempt to speak in opposition.

Not hearing any complaints from the children forced to take care of even younger children is NOT a good criterion on whether or not they are being affected by being forced into this situation--a situation their parents chose based on "religious" beliefs which will brook no denial--a set of circumstances created by their parents and which they themselves did not ask for.

And if you think this post has dismay and some anger behind it--talk to the older Duggar children in 5-10 years.

[maude~flanders]

So....back to discussing the actual show....

Johanna was absolutely adorable! I thought it was hilarious when she said she wants to have a lot of children. She is obviously a very happy little girl!

I also noticed that it was Michelle, not the older girls, who was doing the most caretaking of the little ones. She was the one making them sandwiches when all the kids were sitting at the counter, she was the one they ran to when they were hurt, and she was the one feeding the baby. I never see her without a child at her side. And, I noticed that the way they act around her is just natural and normal, not like mom is "playing mom" for the cameras, as I have seen on other shows. I think that Jim, the sound-guy, bringing his daughters to spend time with the Duggar girls was one of the best compliments possible. He sees the good, bad, and the ugly, and knows everything that goes on when the cameras are off. He obviously likes what he sees.

As for Jim Bob joining Weight Watcher's - well, I don't think he has it in him! He's a nice guy, but I think he is clueless about things like this.

Also, seeing the dynamic of the relationship between Michelle and Jim Bob in that episode showed that Michelle is not some simple-minded Jim Bob follower. She seems to have a strong say in the relationship.

[just1paul]

So....back to discussing the actual show....

Johanna was absolutely adorable! I thought it was hilarious when she said she wants to have a lot of children. She is obviously a very happy little girl!

I also noticed that it was Michelle, not the older girls, who was doing the most caretaking of the little ones. She was the one making them sandwiches when all the kids were sitting at the counter, she was the one they ran to when they were hurt, and she was the one feeding the baby. I never see her without a child at her side. And, I noticed that the way they act around her is just natural and normal, not like mom is "playing mom" for the cameras, as I have seen on other shows. I think that Jim, the sound-guy, bringing his daughters to spend time with the Duggar girls was one of the best compliments possible. He sees the good, bad, and the ugly, and knows everything that goes on when the cameras are off. He obviously likes what he sees.

As for Jim Bob joining Weight Watcher's - well, I don't think he has it in him! He's a nice guy, but I think he is clueless about things like this.

Also, seeing the dynamic of the relationship between Michelle and Jim Bob in that episode showed that Michelle is not some simple-minded Jim Bob follower. She seems to have a strong say in the relationship.

I see this family as being one of the more well adjusted families I have seen anywhere in a very long time. Maybe I sould call Jim Bob regarding his weight watchers, because I don't have it in me either.