The Duggar Family

[FlyAKite]

I didn't have a problem with the pictures of their deceased daughter as I thought that they were respectively done. My only problem is when the group picture of the family at the memorial. They are standing there posing and actually smiling. That to me does not look like a grieving family.

[Debb70]

IMO the family, especially the parents, have become so engrossed in their personal life as a reality star that they have lost the line of separation. We have seen it before this recent miscarriage too. Do you recall how they handled the filming of one of the young sons when he fell and fractured a bone in his face? They have repeatedly demonstrated that they are very absorped in the airing of their personal ordeals. It's sad to me as the little kids are growing up with that being the norm. They even video tape events that occur when the show is not filming so they can show it later on their show. I don't think they value anything as too personal or private to keep from their tv show.

[Boann]

I didn't have a problem with the pictures of their deceased daughter as I thought that they were respectively done. My only problem is when the group picture of the family at the memorial. They are standing there posing and actually smiling. That to me does not look like a grieving family.

My mom loves taking pictures at funerals. People will smile for the camera when she asks people if she can take their picture. Candid shots show the grieving.

[Lizard]

I know that they put multiplication in God's hands. God handles everything and has blessed then immensely. I wonder why he could not give his wife or family a break and get himself fixed. Lately his wife's body is not holding onto pregnancies. She could be putting her life at risk. Her children do need her.

[causingchaos]

My mom loves taking pictures at funerals. People will smile for the camera when she asks people if she can take their picture. Candid shots show the grieving.

There is a picture that a family member insisted on taking when my gramma was dieing with us all gathered around her. While it's not my thing I participated and every single one of us is smiling for two reasons. One we were sharing happy/funny stories before hand and two people smile at cameras when posing.

Funerals and memorials are not always morose things. I've been to more than one that was a happy celebration of the person with lots of smiles and some grief.

[nanarama]

We have taken some great pictures at funerals. I don't find it morbid in the least. It's a time when family is together sharing love and often memories. The most recent one was at my sister's daughter's funeral. My sister had grieved for days to the point of almost making herself ill and, since she had also lost her husband a few years before to cancer, I know she was grateful to be surrounded by her mother, sisters and brother. I love the picture of us smiling and hugging each other. I could not presume to judge someone by the way they handled the grieving process.

[Poppy Fields]

I know that they put multiplication in God's hands. God handles everything and has blessed then immensely. I wonder why he could not give his wife or family a break and get himself fixed. Lately his wife's body is not holding onto pregnancies. She could be putting her life at risk. Her children do need her.

Actually, I've read that for her last few pregnancies she has had to have her cervix sewn closed. Also, that she has had several surgeries for uterine/vaginal prolapse.

[causingchaos]

All it takes is aging and one good child birth, weight issues etc. to cause prolapse. It can happen to any woman even if she has not had 20 kids. Sewing of the cervix also happens to various women who have not had 20 children.

I'm not saying that her choices about children did not contribute to this but it also stigmatizes the women who have had to deal with this stuff who haven't had 20 children.

[tears.and.rain]

It doesn't stigmatize them. No one's saying that women who have had these problems shouldn't have children. What Poppy was saying, I believe, was that this particular woman, who is claiming that God is responsible for all her pregnancies and God is in charge and she'll stop having babies when God tells her to is, in fact, already using "unnatural" methods to hold onto pregnancies. Not that she should be having miscarriages instead! But rather that if she's claiming that she will not use birth control to stop having children because she doesn't want to interfere with God's plan and do anything unnatural, why is she ignoring the fact that naturally, her body can't sustain a pregnancy?

[Debb70]

It doesn't stigmatize them. No one's saying that women who have had these problems shouldn't have children. What Poppy was saying, I believe, was that this particular woman, who is claiming that God is responsible for all her pregnancies and God is in charge and she'll stop having babies when God tells her to is, in fact, already using "unnatural" methods to hold onto pregnancies. Not that she should be having miscarriages instead! But rather that if she's claiming that she will not use birth control to stop having children because she doesn't want to interfere with God's plan and do anything unnatural, why is she ignoring the fact that naturally, her body can't sustain a pregnancy?

I agree with your comments. I think that it is nearly impossible to convince someone who is obsessed with something, how inappropiate or unwise their choices are when it comes to their obsession. For a person who is obsessed with cats, it is nearly impossible to convince them that it's not a good idea to house 80 cats in a 2 bedroom apt. In their mind, it makes perfect sense. No amount of reasoning, pleading, or argument, will convince the person they should only manage a couple of cats.

IMO, Michelle's claim that the unlimited pregnancies are a desire to allow God's will to go unrestricted, is an excuse she uses to mask the real reason. IMO the real reason is her inability to stop procreating. I think she just can't stop it. I pray she gets some help. I don't think she is a bad person, just in need of help.