Each week, our writers come up with some of the best, worst and always memorable moments in reality TV. Enjoy!
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Run Brothers, Run!
Fans of The Amazing Race will likely never see another Jonathan, but Ray certainly came close. If treating Deanna, his sometimes girlfriend and partner, poorly wasn't enough, we were treated to frequent disparaging remarks about other teams, namely older couple Gretchen & Meredith. Despite doing nothing remarkable, Ray felt that he was clearly superior to the bottom feeders and along with Rob, refused to pitch in to help out the oldsters after they were stripped of their money and baggage. Ray wasn't the guy you loved to hate, you just hated him. After the brothers, Brian & Gregg rolled their car, they found themselves at the bottom of the pack, along with frequent bottom feeders, Ray and Deanna. Leaving the Detour, hot on the heels of Ray & Deanna, Brian & Gregg prepared for a foot race before they got out of the vehicle. Once they arrived, they were off and running, literally. Who wasn't desperately hoping the entertaining brothers would beat Ray to the mat? The younger, faster brothers did beat the bickering pair to the mat, officially eliminating Ray & Deanna from the race. The best part? Seniors, Gretchen & Meredith were there, arriving much earlier, to watch the elimination.
Anything You Can Do, We Can Do Better
Poor Bobby Jon and the remains of Ulong on Survivor. When Jeff asked them about how the fishing was going at the beginning of the immunity challenge, they didn't realize it was a set up. Bobby Jon proudly stated that he'd caught a pan-sized black fish which was enough to give each of the three Ulong members a pinch of protein. To make it even worse, he revealed his fear of sharks. The Kororians could hardly contain their glee at once again being able to trump Solong. They shared that Tom hadn't bothered with anything pan-sized. He caught a shark which the Kororians ate until they were sick. They had shark roast, shark steaks, shark tartar, shark stew, and shark toast. Well maybe not all that. Good thing for the small bit of ego Ulong has left that they didn't compare clam sizes or spend much time talking about the MREs Koror got for winning the reward challenge.
Y’all Need to Start Listenin’ to Grandma
Just what are they putting on those girl’s celery sticks on America’s Next Top Model? A healthy dose of calorie-free paranoia, it seems. Sure, it was disturbing to see Michelle’s face go from mildly spotty to frighteningly scabby in a matter of hours. While Michelle nursed her low self-esteem and napped, the other contestants used their phone time to tell their mommies about Michelle’s unfortunate skin. Noelle told her mother that Michelle had the flesh-eating bacteria, and her mom gushed excitedly, “That’s been all over the news!” Hyperbole runs in the family, since that’s all it took for Noelle to babble to the rest of the house about a nationwide alert of a plague that would melt your face off. The girls ran around in a frenzy, peeking at the sleeping Michelle, convinced they had shared mascara with a leper. They would have done better to listen to Tiffany’s grandmother, who when told the “news,” responded: “You need to get a life. Ya’ll ain’t got nothin’ to do. Read a book or something.”
Gretchen Rocks (Ouch!)
There are times when watching a team of senior citizens on The Amazing Race is uplifting, inspiring, and impressive. And then there are the times that make us cringe, secretly wishing that the great-grandparent-aged team would be eliminated so we don’t have to worry about them dislocating a hip every time they race to the mat. This week, the cringing started when Gretchen and Meredith chose to spelunk rather than visit a nice, safe cultural center for their detour task. Gretchen fretted about going down in the cave, but the two managed the spelunking, emerging filthy but triumphant, only to find out they had missed the clue somewhere below. Gamely, the team began their second descent when horror of horrors, Gretchen slipped and fell. When the camera caught up with her, her face was covered in blood and she was moaning in pain. Meredith was beside himself with worry, but once the medics arrived and began treatment, Gretchen ordered her man to leave her side and find the clue. The two emerged from the cave a second time, bloody and battered, but with clue firmly in hand. At any age, they proved themselves to be a formidable team.
A Pair Of Bar Tools.
ABC unleashed the latest edition of The Bachelor upon us this week, with Charlie O'Connell in the title role.
On the second of three group dates, Charlie escorted eight "ladies" to a night club where the liquor flowed and the dancing got grindy.
As the competition hotted up for one of the two roses Charlie had the option to award, Krisily decided that having Charlie simply drink his shots in the conventional manner might not persuade him to throw a bloom in her direction.
She hopped onto the bar and offered up her stomach for a body shot.
She was still wiping his saliva from her abdomen when he gifted her the rose she was so clearly out to snag. Not that that was why she got the rose you understand, of course not.
In a season where we've been promised "no rules", Krisily managed to sit on and lower the bar in one fell swoop.
Threat, That Was No Threat!
Alex flirted and lazed his way through the pizza task on The Apprentice. When a nicotine-deprived, sunflower seed spewing Chris got up in his face and started swearing at him in the mobile pizza unit, Alex didn't dial 911 or scream for Caroline and George to intervene. Instead, Alex waited until he was in a taxi on the way home to tell Stephanie that he felt threatened by the volatile Chris. Stephanie took Alex's statements at face value. When Chris learned what Alex had said, the volcanic one decided to confront Alex about whether he'd actually threatened him. I'm not sure whether Alex claimed to feel threatened as a strategy or if he truly felt in danger. All I know is that if I was Alex, I'd sleep with one eye open so long as Chris remains in the game.
To Phoebe or Not To Phoebe
This week’s episode of The Starlet showed us that comedy is a damn serious business. Charged with recreating a scene from "Friends" - Phoebe and Rachel chatting over coffee - Cecile and Katie fell to pieces over who was better suited for the part of Rachel. Both were convinced playing Rachel would better showcase their comedic talents than the zanier (wackier, funnier) Phoebe. Although Cecile prissily told the camera that Rachel was a “safe” choice (implying that she was a shoe-in as long as she got the right part), she also got her digs in on Katie for daring to think she could make a better Rachel. Rachel, Rachel, Rachel! Eventually, Katie gave in and agreed to channel her inner Phoebe. But...you know how when you were a kid you begged and begged for that magic kit and then when you got it you found it didn’t give you magical powers, but that you had to work and practice just to make a quarter disappear (much less give the dog a pair of wings with a wave of your wand)? Well, after an evening of rocky rehearsal, Cecile began to regret her choice, and cheekily demanded that Katie give up the part of Phoebe. Katie wasn’t about to dump a night’s work, especially since Cecile wasn’t able to give a compelling reason for the switch. What should Cecile have done, told her flat out she thought Katie was ruining the scene because she couldn’t act? Too bad she didn’t, because Katie could have laughed her head off when Cecile got the axe.
Warning: Asylum Under New Management.
In every season of The Bachelor we've seen some strange behaviour in the pursuit of victory, so why should this one be any different?
Early indications are that it won't be, it'll be better.
The new "no rules" policy has already led to Kindle running to ensure she makes the first group date and thereby consigning a dressed and ready Carrie to an afternoon in the ladies lodgings. Gina Marie gatecrashed date number two after Siomara, who had lied that she was responsible for picking who got to go on the date, promised she'd pick her and didn't. Geitan walked out of the date and off the show, only to walk right back in and call Krisily a slut during the new free-for-all style Rose Ceremony, where insults were exchanged and Charlie was deemed shallow for his rose choices.
Amid all the lunacy, Charlie's main point of concern seemed to be fakeness Danushka displayed by wearing her sunglasses to their first meeting.
After six seasons and with only one relationship intact, we know better than to expect romance from this show, but with this new policy and a bunch of ladies willing to go to whatever lengths to win, it should at least be entertaining.
Many thanks to the contributors this week to the article, in alphabetical order; Fluff, Hepcat, Mariner & Miss Filangi