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Thread: Star Dates 01/12 - Phyllis Diller

  1. #1
    The race is back! John's Avatar
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    Star Dates 01/12 - Phyllis Diller



    Her Vitals

    Better Known As: Venerable stand-up comic with trademark cackle
    Age: 85
    Astrological Sign: Cancer
    Status: Two-time divorcée (First Husband, Sherwood Anderson Diller, 1939-1965; Second Husband, Warde Donovan, 1965-1975)
    Longtime Fictional Husband: Fang, a frequent target in her act
    Hair: "I call it blonde, but at the beauty parlor, they say white."
    Eyes: Green
    Height: 5'2"
    Pacemaker: One, installed in 1999
    Smokes? "Never."
    Drinks? Social drinker: "Two martinis, straight up with an olive."
    Spit takes? "Never. I'm not one of those kind of jokers."



    Her Personality

    Meet the Real Me: "I am a kind person. In fact, kindness is my religion. I treat everybody the same. And I smile at everybody and try to make them have a moment of pleasure."

    What the Real Me Is Looking for in the Real You: "He'd have to be terribly rich. [Trademark cackle.] No, he'd have to be cultured, very well educated, well spoken, well dressed, total gentleman, sense of humor--and that's about it."

    In My Bedroom, You'll Find: "Twenty-five pillows, a CD player, a record player, a tape player, three easy chairs [and] a concert harpsichord," which, yes, she plays.

    Music That Puts Me in the Mood: "I like piano jazz, gentle piano jazz--Bill Evans is best."

    Music That Puts Fang in the Mood: "You've got to remember that Fang is a myth and does not exist."

    What I Tell People Who Think Fang Does Exist: "[I say,] he's at home in his cage."

    Best Movie to Watch in Front of a Roaring Fire: Laura, the 1944 noir classic starring Gene Tierney

    Best Type of Movie to Watch--Period: "I prefer funny movies--love funny movies. My favorite was Airplane!"

    Turn-Ons: "Great piano jazz or terrific art."

    Turn-Offs: "Anything that's gauche, bad taste, clichés, sloppy dressers."

    Celebrity I'd Like to Date: "I guess Harrison Ford. He's all man. He's gorgeous. He's not a pretty boy."

    Celebrity I Have Dated: Andy Warhol. Really. They attended the opening of a Broadway show. "It was black tie. From the waist up, he had the black tie--the whole thing. [From the waist down], jeans and sneakers. As long as he was sitting down in the theater, it looked okay."

    Hobby: "Playing gin--I've invented a game called Diller Gin [in which deuces are wild], and I play every day."

    True or False: There Isn't a Nightclub on the Planet That I Haven't Told a Joke In: "Probably very few. Unless they're in a really teeny town. I played everywhere...Any place where they speak English."

    Best Way to Wear a Feather Boa: "Around your neck."

    Best Place to Store Your Feather Boas: "I have a boa closet. I have one closet devoted only to feather boas. And I have every color that you could ever imagine."

    Best Place to Store Your Fright Wigs: "I have a wig room, where there must be maybe 200 wigs."

    My Little Secret: "When my mother was pregnant with me, they thought [I] was a tumor."

  2. #2
    The race is back! John's Avatar
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    She looks better now than she did in the old photo they're going to hand out to the dates.

  3. #3
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    Supposedly if you choose to only watch one Star Date this year... and by all accounts 99.9% of America are chosing to watch none... then do watch this one!
    "George Oscar Bluth II, aka GOB, featured magician in the best selling videotape, "Girls With Low Self Esteem" invites you to enter his world.
    -- Arrested Development, Season III

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