Todd TV: 1/28 Episode - Goat Milking Grumpiness

[Bill]

Todd TV
1/28 Episode

Back again with the weekly recap of Todd TV.

This week, Todd got a new roommate and a new job. Sorry Anthony, back to the paper route for you buddy. Oh, and Todd got a new attitude too, only it wasn’t what Dr. Pavlo was looking for. Want to learn more? Read on my friends…

Todd Hall Wrap Party

After the obligatory recap of the previous week, we join Todd and the gang immediately after the end of last week’s show. They all decide to celebrate with fashionable adult beverages. Todd makes it clear that he wants to be voted into the job with Bret. All else is secondary. Besides, the roommate vote is a big loser for Todd either way.

Bret promises Todd he will have a great time working with him, and the Singing Telegram guy offers very sincere good luck wishes to Todd as he departs. Todd is in good spirits, until he sits down with Mom for a drink or two.

Mom starts in with her usual incessant nagging and questioning. Is it any wonder Todd has spent much of his life just wanting to be left alone? Todd tries to change the subject, but to no avail. Then Mom says it will be great when they are roommates, as she could even follow him to the studio!

I think Todd almost lost it right there. I am guessing that if he had a beer bottle in hand that Mom might have resiewduB tattooed across her forehead. But he calms down and tells Mom that just because they might be roommates; it doesn’t mean she gets to follow him around all week. Mom is, of course, crushed by that news. This should lead to another round of guilt-tripping.

They proceed to drink quite a bit, though I am not sure if Todd was legally drunk. I would hope not, as the next scene shows him and Mom driving home. Todd hits something on arrival, and having not heard any screams of pain, I am assuming that it was not a camera man, though I wouldn’t put it past him to aim for that producer who wanted to film him in the shower last week.

Mom jokes that Todd is as drunk as she is. Well gee Mom, I guess it is good thing you didn’t let him drive. The family that drives drunk together - stays together. How touching.

Counting the Votes

The next morning, Todd is just a wee bit hung-over. However, he is worried about the voting results and begins calling George to find out when he can get the results. He also calls friends to see how many times they voted, and immediately one of the drawbacks of being a slacker comes to the forefront, that being your friends might be slackers too. Todd should not be surprised to learn that some of his friends forgot to vote.

He gets some reassurance though during breakfast at a café where some strangers at the next table say they saw the show, and that they voted for the job with Bret. Todd smiles for one of the few times in this episode.

Back at the house, Mom and Dr Palvo have arrived, suitcases in tote, waiting for the results. Mom says she is worried that Todd might “blow up” at her, and then feel bad afterward. Not sure about the latter part there Mom. Dr Palvo admits that she is a voyeur and would not hesitate to watch Todd all week long. This is getting just a bit creepy.

Not only does Todd get a new roommate though, he is also getting a new bed. Well, a new bunk bed, so that he and his new roomie can spend even more time together. We also get a look around the house and realize that it is so dirty that even a cockroach would rope off the bathroom as a biohazard area.

George arrives on scene just in time to announce the vote. Outside the house he meets up with Todd to prepare him for the results. Todd says he is “very very very nervous”, and George displays the impressive resume interview skills that soon will vault him over Barbara Walters on the A – list when he says “so you are saying you are nervous?”

Okay, so I saw the smirk on his face when he said it. I think George is simply enjoying the moments of the show as Todd twists in the wind. I know I would be.

Back in the house, George is dragging this out as long as he can, and Todd is almost squirming while waiting for the dreaded results. Todd speculates that if the kids of America hate him, they will make him shack up with Mom. This, of course, hurts Mom’s feelings, but between these two, hurt feelings is the norm, rather than the exception.

The vote comes in *drum roll*… 58% for Dr Pavlo. She will be Todd’s roommate, and she looks disturbingly happy about it. Todd says he’ll “make the best of it”. Prompting the Doc to jump right in and pick up the mantle of nagging by asking “What does that mean?”

You’re a doctor, specifically one who listens and helps people, and you can’t figure out that Todd doesn’t want you there? Jeez, even I could figure out that deep dark secret, and I can’t even get my dog to listen to me.

Mom is pretty bitter, but George helpfully prompts Todd to thank America for their vote. It was the best result for Todd out of a worst case scenario.

The Odd Couple

Dr Pavlo moves right in, and announces she is a gourmet cook. However that means they need a trip to the local Ralph’s for groceries, unless the Doc is so good that she can turn Hamburger Helper into Chicken Cacciatore. Obviously you would need to be a master chef on the level of Cousin Eddie to pull that off.

Later, Todd’s roommate Brent finally comes home. I had wondered what happened to him last week. Work release program I suppose. He thinks the bunk bed arrangement in Todd’s room is quite entertaining. He even asks “Who gets the top?” I give Brent credit, he seems to be very open and friendly with the doctor. Just trying to have fun.

Doctor Pavlo is back to her old tricks when she asks what the house rules are. It really is out of her comprehension to understand what living as a single guy on the beach means. Basically, as long as you conduct bodily functions in the general vicinity of the bathroom, and don’t drink the last beer, you are fine. No rules beyond that. The whole point of beach living is NOT to have rules. The Doc needs to get up to speed on this basic single guy philosophy.

That night, an actual crisis erupts when Dr Palvo’s boyfriend (or ex-boyfriend) scares her son. She is pretty upset, but Todd is right there, being helpful, and taking charge of a good solution. Now I have been a little sarcastic about Todd in these reports so far, but it is clear to me that he is a good guy, and he was great during this potentially bad turn of events. I just think he should have realized that he was pretty happy before this show started, and now he seems miserable. Maybe he should have just stayed happy?

Great Music Begins with a Carwash

The next day (day 9 for those of you scoring at home), Todd gets a call from George, who wants to meet at Todd’s new job. They arrive at a recording studio, which get’s Todd’s hopes up. George knows an opportunity to torture when he sees one, so out rolls Singing Telegram guy, and we break for commercial. Todd is in a near panic state.

Back from commercial, we learn that Todd had nothing to fear. America granted him his wish, and by a landslide. 72% vote for Todd to work with Bret Michaels of Poison.

Bret congratulates Todd and immediately puts him to work. What could Todd being doing first? Learning the mixer board? Tuning instruments? Brainstorming lyrics? No. Bret wants Todd to learn via tough love. So outside we go where Todd will be washing Bret’s Benz.

During that process we learn that Todd has no idea how coded keys work, which is not surprising, but also that he cannot seem to operate a shammy cloth. That last part is a little scary, but having seen Todd’s car, I can believe it.

Todd Hates Suzanne… Let’s Make Him Date Her

George informs Todd that he needs to start dating. Someone emailed in a suggestion that hey, that Suzanne looks kinda hot, so why don’t you date her? Todd is appalled. He pretty clearly does not want to see Suzanne, but George reminds him of that darn contract, and says “Do it anyway.” Even George is getting fed up with Todd’s attitude.

Don’t give in George! You are the rock of this show! Oh, and one of our newest FORT members too.

Todd ends up having lunch with Suzanne, and he is not in a good mood. Todd says he honestly only remembers them messing around. Suzanne says that Todd was so obsessed with her that he was calling constantly, but she likes him, and is rooting for him. An interesting example of difference in perception.

Yes, Suzanne is on the long list of women in Todd’s life that feel like they can help “fix” him. Why are women always obsessed with fixing a man? You can’t change them, and even if you could, you would probably not like the results.

The lunch is less than friendly, and mercifully, ends as quickly as possible.

Todd’s frustrating day is not over though. He has a therapy session with Dr Pavlo, and what the hell, we haven’t seen Mom in a good ten minutes, let’s bring her in as well. Having followed the show this far, can you guess what happens next?

Exactly.

Todd is not happy Mom is there. Mom’s feelings are hurt yet again. Dr Pavlo seems strangely satisfied that she has ruined yet another day in Todd’s life. We all have our hobbies I suppose.

A New Approach to Love!

Day 10 in Todd’s ongoing nightmare.

George informs him that America still wants him to find a girlfriend. Todd’s attitude reaches bottom, and he lets us all know that America already ruined his life this week.

Perhaps so Todd, but then you are the guy prostituting yourself on TV for $5000 a week. You are hardly an innocent bystander here.

Todd meets Renee Piane who is a “dating expert”. Okay, so now I am wondering what you have to do to become a dating expert? Is there some kind of program down at the Community College?

Or better yet, is that one of those programs that Sally Struthers talks about in those commercials where you can study at home? Speaking of that, how do you study X-Ray Technician or Veterinary Assistant jobs at home? I bet there are some terrified animals hiding under beds in those houses.

But I digress…

Todd will be Rapid Dating, which is basically spending five minutes or so with a bunch of women, and then deciding if there is anyone you would like to learn more about.

Todd is still not happy with this, and points out that if he wanted to be on a dating show, he would have already done that. Too bad Todd, you should have read the fine print on that contract.

Todd proceeds to meet Kristin, Gina (who is cute), Margie, Michelle (who is hot), Stacy, and Katherine. Oh, and let’s not forget Tara, who runs a porno web site by day. Michelle is quite a character, asking Todd if he knows how to milk a goat. When he says no, she says she is surprised he has gotten by in life.

At the end of the rapid dates, Todd sits down with Renee, who says that she saw him most happy with Gina and Stacy. Therefore Todd will date both of them.

The next night they have a double date of dinner and salsa dancing lessons. We learn more about Gina and Stacy. At one point Todd asks them what they think of him. Stacy gives the pat date answer that he is a good person. Gina likes him, but points out that Todd is a little cocky (please read that carefully before emailing), and that he has skated by on his good looks and green eyes.

I think Gina is perfect for him. The date ends with hugs all around, and we are left to wonder what will be next for Todd. I suppose there is a America’s vote question waiting to be had there.

You too can be a Cable Wrangler

The next day, Dr Pavlo is realizing that her week is coming to a close, and yet somehow Todd has not opened up to her. “He is shutting me out.” She says. So once I again I ponder if she is just now figuring this out. I would have thought all the times that Todd has emphasized that he doesn’t want therapy would have been a good clue.

Todd goes to work, and this time Bret has him sorting cables. Then going on a beer run. Then vacuuming the studio. Todd is depressed, this isn’t at all what he thought it would be, plus there are no groupies.

Todd Hall

Everyone gathers for Todd Hall. George stops Todd outside though, and he wants to address again Todd’s deteriorating attitude. George points out that Todd has been bitching and complaining about everything. Todd says that is reality, and this is reality TV. George points out that part of this reality TV experience is that if America hates you, it will be bad for Todd in terms of choices.

Suitably chastised, Todd goes in for the ceremony.

Bret tries to reassure him that the gopher boy job will work out well for Todd, and that there is a good song coming out of it. I have my doubts, unless the song is Ode to The Rolling Rock Beer Boy.

Dr Pavlo blames Todd for their failure to connect during the week as roommates. I’ll say it again, slowly this time. Todd … doesn’t… want… therapy. You would think they would cover this at brain doctor school. I know the Sally Struthers course would.

Suzanne, still burned from lunch, and from being spurned, wants to get her shots in on Todd. I will take his approach though and just ignore everything she said. George gives Todd his first paycheck for the week. It is one of those golf check gigantic things. I have always wondered how you deposit those.

Finally, Renee invites in Todd’s dates, Stacy and Gina into the house. Gina says that she feels like she and Todd got off on the wrong foot (to which Todd shakes his head “no”). You can guess what is coming next…

QUESTION ONE – Should Todd try to build a relationship with:
a) Gina
b) Stacy

Next, George lets us know that Todd will be getting complete makeover. In walks a makeover consultant and he brings two models. One is labeled conservative (basically blazer and vest) and the other is described as “rock and roll all night”, but looked more like punk to me.

QUESTION TWO – Should Todd’s new look say:
a) I want to rock and roll all night
b) Takin’ care of business

Next Week

Todd learns how he will dress and who he will date. I don’t seem him on the edge of his seat over either choice.

Your comments are welcome. bill@fansofrealitytv.com

[Google]

 

[museumguy]

Great re-cap bill.....since I saw just enough of the show to see what George looked like and I can say as a new fort member he did us proud......The title Goat milking grumpiness was great....and as always the witty comments abound...

[Candybar]

I am so relieved to know one other person was watching the show!!! I felt so alone, maybe Dr Barb can help.....................

This is a cute guy.

I have a friend who has the slightly crazed expression in her eyes that Suzanne had in one of the interivews. I am sure she would be willing to spend countless selfless hours fixing Todd and providing for his every need. All he would have to do is to let her control every aspect of his life. Dr Barb has her work cut out. If he does nothing else but get on the path to being whoever he is that will be enough for the show to accomplish.

I agree Dr Barb's crisis did bring out a positive side of Todd we had not seen. Maybe he is so sad on the show because he is just realizing what he has done having handed over even more control of his life when he is so clearly struggling with getting away from Mom. I would be interested in who he is a year from now after this experience.

[LG.]

very funny stuff, Bill. I love any reference to Vacation. This had me rolling:

Dr Pavlo moves right in, and announces she is a gourmet cook. However that means they need a trip to the local Ralph’s for groceries, unless the Doc is so good that she can turn Hamburger Helper into Chicken Cacciatore. Obviously you would need to be a master chef on the level of Cousin Eddie to pull that off.

[chompstick]

What a bummer. I saw this thread (have not seen the show) and got all excited that it was about another Todd. Oh well...

[cali]

I think Todd almost lost it right there. I am guessing that if he had a beer bottle in hand that Mom might have resiewduB tattooed across her forehead

Todd is not happy Mom is there. Mom’s feelings are hurt yet again. Dr Pavlo seems strangely satisfied that she has ruined yet another day in Todd’s life. We all have our hobbies I suppose.

I’ll say it again, slowly this time. Todd … doesn’t… want… therapy. You would think they would cover this at brain doctor school. I know the Sally Struthers course would

Gina likes him, but points out that Todd is a little cocky (please read that carefully before emailing), .

You make a... well, not so wonderful show, extremely entertaining! Thanks Bill, You Rock.

They proceed to drink quite a bit, though I am not sure if Todd was legally drunk. I would hope not, as the next scene shows him and Mom driving home. Todd hits something on arrival, and having not heard any screams of pain, I am assuming that it was not a camera man, though I wouldn’t put it past him to aim for that producer who wanted to film him in the shower last week.

It blows me away that nobody called them a cab!