Here we go again ladies and gentlemen! Take a minute to read our latest Top Ten List. You may find yourself wanting to watch a show or two that you’ve never seen!
10. Fire in the Hole
Things were hectic in the kitchen of "The Restaurant" on "Soft opening night" with waiters shouting out orders, chefs and mini-chefs rushing around like crazy trying to fill and plate them and get them out to the hungry hordes in the dining room.
Without warning, a fire erupted from a pan of overheated oil on the stove and began to burn merrily. The fire was blazing as everyone stood around dumbfounded, not knowing what the next step should be. Rocco kept yelling at them to use sheet pans to cover and contain the fire, but no one made a move. Finally, one Einstein brought out the fire extinguisher and started spraying the nasty stuff on the blaze causing an awful lot of smoke and chaos. As if they didn't have enough trouble already.
Chef Rocco, never one known for his calm demeanor, yelled out, "Is everyone having fun yet?" Much to my amusement (and we needed some on this show), some unknown joker actually shouted back, "Yes!"
Things went further downhill after that.
9. Marry My Dad - The Kids Are Not Alright!
The kids are just too funny! These are the adult children of dear old Dad Mueller on Who Wants To Marry My Dad? and they are so cute. They shriek and recoil in horror when they watch Dad kissing a woman, and then get all tearful when they have to send one of their would-be step moms packing.
But do they even listen to Dad? Oh no! If he likes her, then they get rid of her, that's their credo.
Goofy Cynthia, who looks like a vintage 50s B-movie actress, was not attractive to Mr. Clean, so the kids decided to keep her during the Penn & Teller disappearing act, and make Lori (who Dad felt more comfortable with) vanish into thin air.
Dad was incredulous. How could they do that to him? Out of a sense of obligation, he asked Cynthia to join him on the one-on-one date later on that evening.
The next thing you know, the kids are watching Dad lock lips with the B-Movie Queen and suddenly the chemistry starts happening between the spit swappers.
That'll teach those meddling Muellers!
8. Daddy's Girl
It was time to cut to the chase this week on For Love Or Money 2. Being sensitive, funny, attentive, takes time, impressing the daughter of a former San Francisco 49er with your throwing skills doesn't.
Chad F, Thomas and Eric all took their turn throwing a football at a moving target to win Erin a stuffed toy dressed in a 49ers jersey.
Is it purely coincidence that when it came to the elimination ceremony, despite having so much in common with Chad F, and feeling "amazing" any time she is near Thomas, she booted the two guys that missed the target?
7. Talking Balls.
Mama Di Spirito came to the rescue this week, turning up at The Restaurant at 6.30 on the opening morning to make 300 meat balls (secret ingredient - love).
One particular loud and brash Italian adult son and his family of diners, complained amongst themselves about the quality of Mama's meatballs. "They're raw", "she doesn't know how to fry them", and they all agreed that the Mama of their particular family made a far superior "ball".
The mood changed when Mama DiSpirito herself appeared from the kitchen to get their opinion on her creation, the loud son gave her a giant hug and told her these were the best meatballs he'd ever tasted.
The rest of his family remained silent and stoney faced at this drastic change of opinion... until Fran Drescher came and sat at the table beside them and scored herself an unwanted invite to sample "the best meatballs in the world" at their house.
6. SHORT SHEETED
Just when I thought reality TV had hit bottom, the gang at PARADISE HOTEL started digging! The group lolling around in their luxury that they call Paradise had to come up with something to do so they decided on a Toga Party. Now in my experience Toga parties were big and basically a reason to buy lots of booze and wear little clothing to a party, and it was usually a college thing. This group's supposedly in Paradise isn't that a party 24/7 ? They have free alcohol and they live in bathing suits! Well, they called house keeping and got sheets and the six of them paraded around in front of each other and America then got drunk and stupid to entertain themselves. The fact that they had to come up with an idea to act like high schoolers during a first time drunk makes the Paradise Hotel Greek week a top ten moment.
5. In A Class Of Her Own
Bad facts on banner planes was the order of the day on a group and family beach date on Who Wants To Marry My Dad? this week.
The final plane's banner told the kids they needed to eliminate one of the ladies.
The rest of the women looked daggers at Kathy as she requested a private audience with multi-million dollar Dad.
Unlike the ladies who had previously asked for "alone time", increasing her stock in the game was not a consideration for Kathy.
She is 39, want a child of her own and eliminated herself from the running when Dad told her he has no desire to add to his tally of four children.
She broke the news to the other ladies in a tearful farewell. A couple of them even made room for a few tears of their own amid the dollar signs.
4. Is that a Kleenex In Your Pocket...?
Keith had the guts to do what Tara wimped out of last week, send home one of the power players on Paradise Hotel.
The Zack/Amy/ Kristin/Alex strangle hold on the game was finally broken.
He remained icy cool as he selected Amy as his roommate, forcing Zack to leave paradise...FOREVER.
He didn't flinch when Zack commented that he had targeted him because he was intimidated by him. He retained perfect composure when confronted by banshee Toni, demanding an explanation of his actions.
Even after stuffing their Speedo's with tissues following the loss of a bet on a tennis match to Dave, Alex and Zack still showed themselves to be trailing Keith in that department.
3. Lost The Plot
Race To The Altar began this week, a Fear Factor/Newlywed Game mongrel of a show with a Survivor-ish elimination process.
There are two challenges. You win a challenge, you become a "power couple" and not only can you not be eliminated, you get to decide with the other power couple who will be booted that week.
Pretty simple stuff.
Susan and Coyt won the first challenge and despite host Lisa's ad nauseum repetition of the very simple rules, Susan snapped at Becca and Andy that "we know you want to get rid of us anyway" following their win of the second challenge.
Susan's expression remained blank as a startled Becca explained to her yet again that she was safe this week.
They couldn't boot Susan this week, but her little outburst might just ensure they want to next.
2. "She's Got the Brains, and I've got the Brawns" - Nathan, Big Brother 4
In an unholy alliance, nominee for eviction and general pain in the ass Alison, reinforced her pact with pretty-boy and sometime cuddle partner Nathan. He promised to win the Power of Veto and take her off the block, and she in turn promised to win HOH.
However, they agreed that it was very important to keep everything under wraps and not give away their plan.
Nathan readily won the POV by placing bouncing green balls into plexiglass tubes faster than anyone else, and Alison won the luxury competition that allowed her to select a date for a special romantic candlelight dinner. Without hesitation she chooses Nathan.
There is food and there is wine and then there is Alison getting completely wasted. After dinner she goes over to the hot tub while trying to seduce her ex, Justin. She blabs everything to him that she was supposed to keep to herself.
In the most startling move since Marcellas failed to use the POV to save himself, Nathan rescues Alison and after the obligatory hug that makes Dana's lips curl in a major snarl, Alison goes on to win HOH by bouncing the most blue balls into a Plexiglas tube which pretty much guarantees Dana's exit stage left.
1. Do You Break This Man?
The competitors on The Amazing Race this week, we given a detour choice of "stomach" or "hands".
Engaged couple and serial arguers, Kelly and Jon, chose "hands" and found the task required them to each karate chop their way through three stacks of wood.
Jon managed his easily, but Kelly was in pain and close to tears after a few unsuccessful attempts.
Kelly's temper was about to fray again thanks to Jon's unsolicited coaching from the sidelines, when he suddenly managed an inspired piece of advice.
"Imagine it's my face".
Kelly reared back, punched from the shoulder and broke the stack on the very next attempt.
Kelly's told us many times that she wants their marriage to be a 50/50 partnership. Jon might have just had a little insight into what's to come if it isn't.
The FORT would like to thank the writers that contributed this week. They are, in alphabetical order: CaliGirl, Firegirl, and fluff