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I turn on the TV on Sunday night
Holly Robinson says, “Why does Cyndi Lauper get off so light?”
Oh Holly dear you’re just a two-faced blight
On this show, where Cyndi just wants to have fun

The teams show up at Trump’s gold palace in the morning light
Trump says, “All you people wanna do is fight,
So Bret & Curtis – you switch places and make it all right
Now go do your task, you decorate an apartment and in 24 hours get it done,
Hotshot designer Jonathan Adler, in his field he’s number one
And some guy from Bridge Street Worldwide will judge – you’re under the gun,
So go – and make it look fun!”

That’s all they really want
Some fuuuunnnnn,
When the arguing is done
PMs are Holly and Sha-ron
Oh girls, you’ll compete to be the final one
Oh girls, the task’s just begun

Bret’s got eyes for a pretty girl
Even a bitch like Holly, he wants to rock her world
Holly says she wants to do it like zen
Rock Solid’s girls, they know what to do with their men
Keeps Curtis busy with a measuring tape,
He worries they won’t finish, it’s gonna be late
But the girls, their ideas they’re gonna take & run,
And Curtis says by the end, he’ll be their number one
Oh Curtis dear, you’ll have your day in the sun

Holly worries that her team ain’t right
Gives a red room to Cyndi so they won’t fight
Bret handles the girls, his method is tight
While Sharon shops with Curtis, Maria’s back she’ll bite
Maria knows when she’s outfoxed
But not yet, she hasn’t lost
She still has a chance with the boss

True colors

Bret, with the managing skills,
Not yet discouraged
He realizes
It’s time to take courage
Takes pics of the city
Cause he knows he could lose it all
He’s leaving for a show later on
And while he’s there gotta have it on the ball

Cyndi sees Holly’s true colors
Seafoam green and lesbian wanna-be
A Buddha and a bamboo screen
Brings them together, but not forever
Sharon sees through Holly too
Thinks Balinese is not so cool
The true colors
To win this week
Is prison gray and builder beige
So not like a rainbow

Holly loves Bret so,
Unhappy to let him go
Lets Cyndi have her rock ‘n’ roll lounge
Rock Solid, their friends they will gouge
For tons of free stuff, while Maria is left
To meet with the Trump henchman, it’s more than she can bear
Oh teammates…I call you up but you’re not there

Holly sees Cyndi’s true colors
She yells at painters and carries tables,
Maria sees Sharon’s true colors,
No purple walls and no help available
Don Jr. visits Holly, whose world makes her crazy,
Now not feeling so zen,
Curtis calls up his friends
Bribes them with pizza and beer
For painting, they’ll be there

The goonies ‘r’ good enough

Here we are
Hanging onto strains of greed and blues
Sharon says the red wall ain’t good enough
Ain’t good enough for her
Maria goes, ay yi yi yi yi yi

Now Curtis says
The task is a monumental flop
Sharon’s furniture too big to move
While Bret’s pics are too small for the zen groove
But it’s good enough for the PMs
Good enough for them
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

Bed Bath & Beyond
Holly and Cyndi find time to bond
Or maybe they’re out of place

Rock Solid’s apartment is a mess
Tenacity is ready, but Bret’s under duress
Holly and Cyndi fight like cats
The red room is rockin’, in spite of the spats
Bret runs up and down 18 flights of stairs
Almost ready for the judges to decide how they’ve fared

But is it good enough?
Is it good enough for Adler?
He likes Buddha and Bret’s pics
Rock Solid’s media room is a dud
The lack of dressers is a point that sticks
What’s good enough for the teams
Isn’t good enough for the judges
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah


The teams arrive in the boardroom teeth bared ready to fight
Trump says, “Curtis, did you make it with the ladies all right?”
Sharon says, “I’m a big mouth old bat, and I like to have fun
Curtis, he’s now my number one”

The judges thought they all did the task right
But in the end, Rock Solid walks away with the prize
Cyndi’s pissed and says she did all the hard stuff
But she’s up against Holly, who’s way more tough
Cyndi’s hard to manage, that is the fact
Bret thinks she’s nuts and talks too much, but says it with tact

Trump sends them all out to think it over a bit,
Is troubled because the red room wasn’t Cyndi’s sole gig
Holly & Bret have each other’s backs, but Bret’s being quiet
And Trump doesn’t like it when a guy has no fight

It looks bad for Bret, but he says Cyndi should be fired
Holly agrees, though Cyndi told the truth and she’s a liar
Trump decides, it’s not Cyndi’s day in the sun,
It’s Trump’s way of having fun
When the workin’ day is done
It’s how Donald Trump has his fun

He just wanna, he just wanna,
He just wanna, he just wanna,
Oh Trump, he just wanna have fun.

So I’m no Weird Al, but a girl just wants to have fun with a recap now ‘n’ then.