5/5 Biggest Loser Recap: Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad

[AshleyPSU]

(Registered members may comment here.)

Did you ever hear the song that goes, “This is the song that doesn't end, yes it goes on and on my friends...”? Well, this is the show that doesn't end. Yes it goes on and on my friends. Seriously. Stop the madness. Just stop it. Don't get me wrong, I love The Biggest Loser. I'm a fan of the show, I really am. I'm just so over this season. I feel like this show has been on for like 9 months straight. Oh wait, THAT'S BECAUSE IT HAS!!! Please NBC. No more back-to-back seasons. Please! Are you there God NBC? It's me, AshleyPSU.

I think this episode's recap is going to be short and sweet, due to the fact that I'm sure this episode is going to be mostly review as well as boring at-home footage. Also, I think I need to save my strength for next week's 3 hour (yes, you read that correctly) whopper of a finale.

We begin with reminders of the remaining 4 contestants' starting weights at the beginning of the season. Tara weighed in at 294, Helen at 257, Mike at 388, and Ron at 430. Yes, we know. They were heavy.

The contestants head home in some shnazzy limos, all whilst reflecting upon their lives and their journeys on the show. They've changed their lives, etc. Didn't we cover this all last week?

All of the contestants arrive home to massive celebrations of friends and families. Everyone is excited and surprised.

Lists are cool. Everybody's making 'em.
-Helen's nose looks really big. Mean? Maybe. True? Absolutely.
-Helen can't believe what her old clothes look like.
-Ron feels bad that he wasn't a better role model for his kids.
-Tara's friends claim to have realized that she was unhappy. Hindsight is 20/20 isn't it?
-Tara gave the kitchen makeover prize to her mother. Tara made turkey mini meatloafs with her new supply of Jenny-O turkey products.

The Final 4 receive packages from the Biggest Loser. I smell a challenge! Ali is on tape and drops the bombshell that everyone is going to run a marathon 26 days from when they viewed the tape. Whoaaa. Are these people really properly trained for that? I mean come on now.

Jillian heads to South Lyon, Michigan to visit Mike. He's at the gym working out with his brother when Jillian shows up. Max is working out? Yay! Go Max! Mike tells her he is having a hard time dealing with the marathon that's coming up. Jillian says she hasn't even run a marathon and can't believe they have to. She hopes to get Mike focused again. She tells Mike he needs to stop worrying about Max and that Jillian will help Max if he wants the help. Next, Jillian heads to Long Island to surprise Tara. Tara's room is an absolute mess. There is just stuff everywhere. She tells Jillian she feels like she has lost control. She went grocery shopping and tore into a bag of chips while walking through the store. Jillian tells Tara she needs to learn balance and to stop living in one extreme or the other. They go work out and then go out for lunch and a drink. Jillian is trying to drill into Tara's head that she can have a dessert and a drink when a friend is in town and not feel horrible about it.

Bob is the next trainer to visit South Lyon, Michigan. He's there to see Ron the Don. Ron tells Bob about the marathon and Bob is speechless. He doesn't think Ron should even attempt to do the marathon and put his body through it. Bob takes Ron and Max to the gym. He acts like Max's trainer and tries to push him to his limits. Bob loves a trainwreck project! Bob at the gym in a plaid flannel looking shirt is kind of amusing. Bob makes Max puke. We get a wonderful view of the action. Nice. Bob tries to show Max some healthy eating options. Instead of his usual double cheeseburger, fries, and chocolate milkshake, Bob shows Max how to eat healthy at... Subway! I bet you didn't see that coming!

Jillian is quite the US traveler, as she is now on her way to Helen's hometown of Detroit, Michigan. She surprises Helen in a restaurant where Helen and her hubby are getting ready to order breakfast. Jillian senses Helen is stressing and isn't the happiest person. She makes Helen sit down and have a glass of wine. Helen is having a lot of trouble accepting that she can drink the wine. Helen, like Tara, is scared of any “bad” food intake. Jillian reminds Helen they aren't sitting down to pizza and garlic bread; they are having some watermelon and some wine. No wonder a lot of these people gain a lot of weight back. They are scared to death of living life at all.

The contestants keep training for the upcoming marathon. They all seem very nervous about it. I can't blame them. Mike is running when all of a sudden he gets an excruciating pain in his hip. He goes to the hospital and it isn't anything super serious, but it's still painful to run. Tara has doubts about her ability to run that distance.

The contestants meet up again with Alison in California at the start line of the marathon. If the contestants finish the 26.2 mile marathon, they will receive $10,000 to donate to a charity of their choice. Ron is determined to finish the marathon because he wants the money for charity and he wants to prove everyone wrong who said he wouldn't finish. Mike's doctors have told him not to run, and he's pretty pissed.

The marathon begins and Tara and Helen take off running. Ron and Mike start off walking. Ron has his trusty ol' walking stick. As Tara and Helen approach mile marker 4, Helen's husband is there to cheer her on and Tara's friend is there to cheer her on. As Mike and Ron approach mile 4, Mike's brother Max and Ron's friend Phil are both there for support. The friends and family join the marathon. Helen's husband stops at mile 8. Max stops around mile 8 as well. Around mile 5, Ron's knee really starts to bother him. The doctor checks him out and gives him the green light to keep racing. As Tara reaches mile 15, Ali Winston, former Biggest Loser, is there to meet her. They run together. Ali tells Tara she is an inspiration. When Helen reaches mile 14, Michelle from last season is there to meet her. They run together. Bernie from Season 5 joins Mike. The surprise guests just keep popping in and out! Mike is still whining that he can't run. When Tara gets to mile 25, Jillian is there to finish the race with her. Go Tara!

Tara finishes the marathon in 4 hours and 55ish minutes. Wow. That girl really is a machine. Bravo. Helen finishes in 5 hours and 48 minutes. Woo! Rock it out! I can't believe these ladies ran a marathon. Mike finishes in 8 hours and 58 minutes. He doesn't look particularly happy at all. He carried the “Mile 26” marker over the finish line. Will Ron finish? Flash to a scene of Ron shaking. His hands are cold and his blood pressure is high. The medical team calls the hospital and the doctor wants to see Ron. His legs are spasming. Dr. H comes to check on Ron, and leaves it up to Ron whether or not he wants to continue the marathon. Ron is determined to finish. He gets to mile 17 and finds a bunch of moral support to walk the rest of the way with him. Yes folks, Heba the Horrible is there. *barf* I cannot believe that Ron is going to finish. He's limping very badly, but is still completely determined to finish. Folks, in a very touching and inspiring moment, Ron finishes the marathon. It took him 13 hours and 16 minutes, but holy man, Ron finished. Mike and Max are bawling like babies. They all share a hug. You know, I'm not a fan of Ron, but this may be the most touching moment so far this season. Way to go, Ron. All of the contestants receive $10,000 to give to charity.

It's time for the FINAL weigh-in on the ranch. For real this time. This weigh-in will determine who makes it to the live finale next week. The 2 people with the highest percentage of weight loss will automatically make it to the finale. The 2 people who fall below the yellow line will be up for elimination. How will the 3rd finalist be chosen? By us! That's right America, you get to vote in the 3rd finalist. Let's see who falls where.

Ron: Previous 289/ Current 279 (-10) -3.46%
Total weight loss: 151

Mike: Previous 224/ Current 214 (-10) -4.46%
Total weight loss: 174

Helen: Previous 154/ Current 147 (-7) -4.55%
Total weight loss: 110
Helen makes the finals.

Tara: Previous 169/ Current 159 (-10) -5.92%
Total weight loss: 135
Tara makes the finals. She currently has the highest total percentage of weight loss out of all the finalists.

Tara and Helen guarantee themselves spots in the Final 3. It looks like America is going to have to choose between Ron and Mike. Hmm... that's a tough one. Will America choose Mikey because he's so darn cute and lovable? Or will America choose Ron in order to assure that a female wins again this year? Uh oh, it looks like it's our turn to vote either with our hearts or our heads.

Ron and Mike get a chance to plead their cases in the confessional. Ron pleads for us to put Mike in the finale. Mike wants to be in the finale, but he also thinks his dad deserves it. I'm getting flashbacks of Ed and Heba. Ed pleaded for us to put Heba the Horrible in the finale, and we all know how that one worked out, don't we?

Next week, it's the Biggest Loser live finale! Will Jillian remain undefeated? Will we have our 3rd female Biggest Loser in a row? Will Tara continue her absolute domination? We know 2 of the finalists, but who will be our 3rd? Tune in for the super sized THREE HOUR finale next week!

**The voting was closed when I posted this recap. That's why you won't find the phone numbers here! I hope you voted for Mikey! *giggle* **

[Google]