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Hello dear readers! Have you all recovered from all of Thursday night’s excitement? Did you miss it? If you did, read MsFroggy’s most excellent recap of all the frivolity here. In brief, Dan was a mischief maker and put Michelle up when Memphis took himself down in the Veto ceremony. And that, my friends, was the precursor to the double eviction of the two dumbest houseguests in Big Brother’s history. Have fun in sequester Michelle and Ollie!

The Fab Four rejoice amidst the pathetic please of Jerry to talk to him. AARP’s future spokesman (/sarcasm) wanders about the house the lone member left of his most recent alliance. Whatever will he do, whatever will become of him? Do any of us care? Keesha has a few faked regrets for the loss of Michelle, or at least what was left of Michelle’s sanity. Ollie promises revenge – oh wait, that didn’t work out so well, did it, Ollie? Dan is regretting the loss of his ‘weak player’ strategy – Dan it served you well, let it go and bring on Super Dan!

Renny is cornered in the kitchen by Jerry who is blathering on about something – oh and did anyone know he was 75? I really had no idea. Renny flees to the Hippie bedroom where she is comforted by Dan and Memphis who say they will keep Jerry away from her this week. In a Diary Room session, Memphis tests the Gods of Foreshadowing by declaring it should be a cakewalk from now til the end. Why, Memphis, why must you do that? (Clothing renting all across America)

Later on, Dan and Memphis are quizzing Renny about Time Zones. Not normally a funny thing except for Renny’s adamant assertions that if it is 8 pm in LA, it must be 6 pm in New Orleans. The guys are laughing and trying to explain it to her, but gosh darn it, she’s live in New Orleans her whole life and she gosh well knows what time it is there! Dan tries to explain it to her again as Memphis just giggles. Suddenly, a light dawns in Club Renny and she says, “Wait, what are you asking me?” as she finally understands what they are laughing at. Fab times with ¾ of the Fab Four. Then we get an unfortunate and long commentary and video clips of Keesha’s hyena-esque laugh. She wishes she sounded as good as a hyena. Anyway, nuff said on that.

Since the last episode saw the eviction of two players, Keesha’s reign as HoH is ended with yet one more HoH competition. They go out to the back yard to see a carnival setup of skeeball. In the Diary Room Memphis and Dan both stress that one of the three alliance members must win and that the odd’s are in the alliance’s favor. Stop tempting the Foreshadowing Gods! I beseech thee! If one of them doesn’t win, then one of them probably deserves to leave, says Memphis.

The competition was similar to ones in past seasons where the hamsters had to figure out on which day an event happened. Once they had that date, they needed to roll their skeet ball to the corresponding slot, or as close as they could get. Each day they were away from the date of the event, they would earn a penalty point. The one with the least amount of points in the end would win the HoH.

First question: On which day did Jerry call Dan Judas? Answer: Day 35. Renny doesn’t seem to have an idea and throws her ball wildly anyway. Memphis guesses and throws, Dan has a good idea and throws and Jerry doesn’t remember the exact date. After all is said and done. Dan has 4 points, Memphis has 6, Jerry has 7 points and Renny is last with 15 points. Second question: What day was the alien invasion? Answer: Day 14. Renny ups her total to 20, Memphis is up to 15, Jerry is up to 15 and Dan has 8, leaving the Fab Four alliance in good standing for the moment. Third question: What day was Brian blindsided? Answer: Day 6. Dan has 11 points, Jerry has 19, Memphis 20 and Renny leads the bottom with 24. Fourth question: When did the Houseguests past come for the food comp? Answer: Day 32. Renny has 38 points, Memphis has 28, Jerry has 22 and Dan is in the lead with 16 points. Fifth question: What day did the earthquake strike? Answer: Day 22. Renny has 42 points, Memphis has 30, Jerry remains at 22 and Dan has crept up to 20 points. Just two small points between him and Jerry.

Yikes, in the ways of the Foreshadowing Gods, Jerry has a chance at winning! 6th question: What day was Jessie evicted? Answer: Day 31. Jerry moves into the lead with 25, Dan has 31, Memphis has 33 and Renny has 51. A feeling of dread crosses the television screen…

Final question
: What day did America give the houseguests lollipops? Answer: Day 39. Dan realizes he has to get the question right and surmises 39 and rolls his ball to land in that slot, leaving him with a total of 31. Unfortunately, the Foreshadowing Gods win and Jerry ends with 29, giving him the HoH. Out of the quintet, he is the only one who is rejoicing. The others look as if Big Brother just gave them all cod liver oil instead of Slop. Dan knows it will be a rough week for the Fab alliance, himself in particular since Jerry considers him the root of all things evil in the world.

Later on, Memphis tells Keesha in the Hippie room that this won’t be a fun week. Dan comes in and postulates that he thinks he and Renny will be up on the block. Memphis sagely notes that all of them have fought with Jerry. Memphis says no way will he make any deals with Jerry.

Whoo hoo. Time for Jerry’s HoH room and a lot of fake frivolity. And what agonizing situation would be complete with out a mind numbingly story about nothing? Jerry obliges with some tale about a snake and heart bypass surgery and left me wanting the knock out drugs that I am sure went with that bypass.

Escaping later on to the Hippie Headquarters, Memphis works to make a deal with Keesha without actually committing to her in words per say. He wants to make sure that she will take him with her to the final 2 over Dan or Renny. He just doesn’t want to actually say that.

Sometime in the night, Renny decides she has to put the towels in the dryer. Keesha tells her she already did it. Renny leaves the room and comes back with a ping pong ball and an Almond Joy. Memphis warns her not to eat the ping pong ball and Keesha cackles. In the morning Renny can’t figure out why there are Almond Joy wrappers in her bed and we all laugh and laugh at funny Renny.

Later on in the back yard, Memphis tells Dan that they just have to make it through this week and then all will be fine. Dan notes that Memphis is going to have to be prepared to say he will take Jerry to the finals. Memphis knows this and is not happy, but seems to want to do what he has to do to keep at least one of them off the block. He confirms this in a Diary Room session, saying that both he and Dan can’t both be on the block if they are going to keep the Renegades going.

Memphis goes up to see Jerry to sell his soul. Memphis wants to be kept off the block and help Jerry with who he wants to go home. Of course, Jerry wants to nominate Judas Dan and that Jerry or Memphis will have to win PoV. Memphis plays up the fact he is still mad that Dan nominated him so he will go along with Jerry’s plan. Interesting note, that Jerry promises this pact, but Memphis does not. Jerry trusts Memphis because he hasn’t seen him make a lot of promises in the House. Errr, Jerry? You still haven’t. Just saying. In another DR session, Memphis confirms once again that his plan is to save Dan.

Nomination time! Gosh, the suspense is killing me…. Jerry makes some speech that I tune out and pulls out Renny’s key as the first person safe. She pulls Memphis’ key, leaving Dan and Keesha on the block. Color me surprised. Not. Predictably, in the Diary Room, Jerry says his goal is to get Dan out and Keesha is a pawn. He is banking on Renny to keep her safe. Dan is happy to be on the block since Memphis is off of it and their plan seems to be in place. Keesha vows to fight! I vow to stop counting the hours til this Jerry HoH is over.

And that is that, folks. Stay tuned for Tuesday when the PoV is played. Who will win? Who will be safe? Who will save us from Jerry stories? Yardgnome will have all the gory details for you in her recap.

Pm me if you have any incredibly boring stories to help me with my insomnia…