Big Brother 8/3 Recap…Johnny 5 was Alive but Sadly Season 5 Can’t Survive
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Welcome everyone. Tonight we have a special edition of Big Brother, we are voting live. Why is this special you ask? I have no idea. I needed something exciting to start this recap with and this was the only thing I could come up with. Maybe someone will slip up and drop a couple of f-bombs the censors won’t be expecting and this will really shape up to be an extra special night of live voting. A girl can wish can’t she?
Tuesday on Big Brother we saw a shift in the nominations. Boogie won the power of veto removing himself from the block. Janelle replaced him with Diane, in tern pissing off most of her alliance and Marcellas. James had a little crying fit about being betrayed. I don’t know if I completely missed something but I have no idea why he feels so betrayed. Did he not betray Jase last week? I guess what is good for the goose is not always good for the gander. Tonight we have a full blown battle of females no one really cares about. They both make footage on the editing room floor and I am lucky to know their names. Which frail, almost anorexic looking woman will go home tonight? Will Dr. Will offer to be put up on the block again? Can season 6 hold their HOH domination? The answers to these questions depend on my being able to stay awake this whole show tonight. Pull out you double shot latte and lets get ready to send someone packin’.
A Vengeful Lad
To kick the show off we go right from the veto ceremony to James reaction that Will was not put on the block. He is downright angry at Janelle for betraying him. Will is just thrilled that he was not put up for eviction in Boogie’s place. Will, Howie and Boogie are all sitting on the couch discussing the ceremony and Howie starts to caress the evil doctor’s leg. Will seems to be upset by this proposition. I don’t understand. I thought all grown men rubbed each others legs? Will thinks Howie is a criminal and would fit in great in prison. Howie seems to agree.
In the workout room James and Danielle are talking. James tells her that BB6 James is back without Sarah to keep him nice. I thought we all new BB6 James was back. It was announced the first day in the house and we have seen him on our TV every week since. I don’t know if he thinks he has been under the radar but he is fooling no one. James wants to start a new group of floaters, Chill Town and Danielle to break up the season 6 alliances.
Diane is out talking with Marcellas and she is really mad that she has been put up for eviction. Marcellas is also mad that she has been put up and Will was not. Marcellas does not like Janelle anymore…or at least until she gets HOH and she has something he wants. He thinks that Janelle is trying to take all the women out so she can be the last female in the house with the boys. He calls himself a “bitter queen” and storms out of the room. I am just going to come out and say this because I feel it needs to be said. Marcellas is nuts. He is the most dramatic person in the house and he seems to have a lot to say for someone who has done nothing.
Up in the HOH room Janelle and Kayser are talking about the days events. She is upset about the reactions she received after the ceremony and from being stuck in a gaudy pink room all week. Kayser tries to calm her down and tell her it was a needed move but maybe not at the right time. Kayser tells her the alliance needs to stay together and they need to make sure that James does not bail on them.
Outside Danielle, Boogie, Will and James are all talking. James wants to form an alliance with the three of them. They all agree they need to win the next HOH so they can start to control the game. James seems very excited about this new alliance but I think he has lost his mind because he is actually trusting Will.
Diary Room: Starring Will & Boogie
Will: Mike Boogie. What’s up?
Mike: Check this out. Are you ready for the latest?
Mike: I think I just formed a sub-alliance between us and James from season 6 and Danielle the girl we tried to vote out the 1st week.
Will: This is Mike Boogie?
Mike: They are going for it.
Will & Mike: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Mike: Someone get these fools a blindfold because they are in the dark.
Please check your local movie listings for dates and times of the next show.
Talk is Cheap When the Story is Good
Julie joins up with the hamsters and wants to discuss the week with them. She approaches Will first and wants to know if he is upset that he was not nominated this week. Will tells her he is and that he is ready to go home. If the producers what to change things up and send him home that would be okay. Now, the powers that be need to step in and challenge him on this. He keeps making the threats and Julie really should tell him his wish has been granted. He should retrieve his items and leave the house immediately. I would be sad because he is my favorite player but this I want to leave act is really wearing me down.
Julie next moves on to Boogie and tells him that he made Big Brother history this past week. He was the first hamster to injure himself in a veto celebration. She wants to know if this is going to affect him in the competitions. He tells her that he received 10 stitches in his foot and he will have them all out in a week. Next up she shows the hamsters their reactions to the wake-up calls. She asks Marcellas what he would like to say to America. Marcellas says that we are all sadistic. If he ever meets us in passing, and he leaves it there, once again a whole lot of nothing coming from his mouth.
Time to Get Saved
Now comes my favorite part of the show, time for the potential evictees to beg their housemates to stay in the game. Diane feels cheated by everyone in the house. People made deals to keep Erika around before the veto competition. Diane talks with Marcellas and he tells her that he already made a deal with Erika. Diane wants to fight to stay in the game. If she is able to stick around this week she is going straight for Janelle and maybe starting an actual physical fight, turning on all the 12 year old boys that watch the show and feeds.
Danielle and Diane talk and Danielle tells her she would like her to stay around this week. Diane gets mad at Erika because she always appears when Diane is trying to have important conversations. Diane acts all surprised that Erika is doing this when it seems like actual smart game play coming from Erika. Danielle talks with James who would also like to see Diane stay for another week. They are going to try and work with Will and Boogie for votes to keep Diane around this week.
Obsessed with Will Much?
Julie meets up with Janelle to have her private HOH conversation. Julie first asks Janelle if she is falling for Will. As her face turns a bright shade of pink and she giggles uncontrollably she tells Julie no and ask her if she is serious. Julie tells her she asked because she kept him off the block this week. Janelle tells Julie that he is not a threat to her and they are good friends. I love when my good friends lie to my face too.
Julie then tells her that when she was HOH before she declared her loyalty to Howie, Marcellas, Kayser and James. She wants to know if she is still loyal to these people in the same order. Janelle tells her she is still loyal to all of them, they are part of her alliance. Julie next wants to know about Chill Town. She tells her that she is not in an alliance with them. Julie follows that up with questions about her loyalty to Marcellas. Janelle tells Julie that he is her friend. I also love when my friends talk about me behind my back in a really derogatory fashion.
This whole Julie and Janelle interview was really ridiculous. I felt like I was back in the 5th grade and my friends and I were talking about who thought was cute, who our best friends were and if we were all going to a sleepover later on that week. That interview was full of more fluff than the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man.
Another Piece of Worthless Filler
Well its that part of the show that I dread the most, some stupid filler piece that the producers put together to torture the viewing audience. What’s it going to be about this week? The history of slop, or how Will got his skin so pale, or maybe such compelling journalism as Howie: Jedi or Buffoon. No tonight is our lucky night we get to find out about Marcellas turning on Janelle. I am so excited I can barely contain myself. Yeah, Alright, Hurray!
Big Brother has dished out the big bucks this year and dug up another past season contestant that we barely remember and surely don’t care about. Tonight its season 3’s Amy, Marcellas’s best friend. Amy first tells us about her life and how she is married to a man that looks like Rhett Butler, obviously mistaking us for people who care. She then talks about how she and Marcellas do not talk anymore and she hates when Janelle is called the new Amy. Season 3 is kind of foreshadowing of what is to happen this season. Amy betrayed Marcellas and Marcellas got voted out of the house. So hopefully since Janelle betrayed Marcellas this week his time to go will be next week. The montage is over and I just lost 5 minutes of my life that I could have been doing something productive like brushing my hair, playing a round of Yahtzee, or even just staring at a blank wall. All would have been better choices than what I just watched.
Taking Down a Season
Julie joins the hamsters in the living room and gives Erika and Diane a chance to make their final plea. When they are done each house guest will be called to the diary room to cast their vote live for all of America to see. Erika goes first and tells everyone that she is honored to be in the house this season and unlike Will she likes everyone a lot. She also would like to stay in the house this week. Diane goes next and gives a shout out to everyone she knows, Mom, Dad, Sister, Carl, Samantha, Tracy, Dion, Kevin, and Yardgnome. (Diane and I are tight) She then tells all the house guests that she loves them but they should not promise votes before the veto competition. Note to Diane: When trying to win votes don’t discipline the voters for their actions. No one likes a bossy pants.
Time to cast some live votes:
Kayser “I will support my friend’s stupid decisions” votes for Diane.
Howie “I have no idea where I am because I have rocks for a brain” votes for Diane
Marcellas “I talk too much because if I didn’t people may think I’m smart” votes for Diane
Boogie “I stay true to my word if it’s okay with Will” votes for Diane
Will “I’ll do what I want” votes for Erika
Chicken George “I will only be remembered for eating slop for 60 days” votes for Diane
Danielle “I’m up in everyone’s business” votes for Diane
James “I talk a big game but can I pull off a big game?” votes for Diane
Diane is evicted from the house with a vote of 7 to 1. She says her goodbyes and grabs her bag and a bag of chips for the ride home.
Julie greets Diane and sits down for another awkward interview. She asks Diane why her and Janelle did not get along. Diane tells her that Janelle made things personal. Julie wants to know how. Diane tells her that Janelle trashed her last season and then tried to apologize but Diane would not accept it so she put her on the block. Julie wants to know what happened to season 5. Diane tells her that people must have seen them as a threat. Finally she wants to know if the Mr. & Mrs. Smith alliance was real. Diane tells her that Jase thought it was real but she knew nothing about it. That interview was quick and painless and I am thrilled about that.
Oh, the Webs We Weave
It’s finally time for the HOH competition. The hamsters all go to the backyard where they are greeted with a giant spider web. Tonight’s competition is called “Caught in the Web.” Each hamster will be on the web and the last person to be hanging on will be the next HOH. This competition will kick off a weeks worth of competitions that will find the hamsters making decisions between power and temptation. I can barely wait.
To start the challenge Julie points out a table with 5 golden eggs on it. Where is Veruka Salt now? 3 of the eggs have prizes in them and 2 have nothing. The prizes are a slop pass that allows you to not eat slop for a week and it is transferable. Another egg has a pass that allows you to cancel someone’s eviction vote. The last prize to win is $10,000. The first five people out of the game get to select an egg.
Everyone goes over to the web and climbs on top of it. Julie tells the hamsters that if anyone touches the mat they will be out. The web rises into the air to make it more difficult I guess. There is a large spider on the web and as soon as the web is high in the air it starts to spray foam out all over the houseguests. This is where the show ends. Everyone is still on the web and we have to wait until Sunday to find out who the new HOH will be.
Make sure to tune in on Sunday to find out whom the new HOH will be and if the house guests will be feasting on slop for another week. Then come back on Tuesday for a glimpse at the veto competition and ceremony. As we are getting ready to part ways Julie tells us that this week we will also learn about the Coup d’ Etat. This will give someone the ability to overthrow the HOH at a moments notice. Now the game is going to get exciting!
My moneys on Will to take this whole thing. Yardgnome77@fansofrealitytv.co m
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