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Hello everyone…Last week on Survivor we had quite the excitement. Two of the young male cast members got violently ill from beans, some people drank wine that was not theirs, and our good friend Bobby was sent off into the sunset. Hopefully this week can live up to the hype of the previews. Most likely not but I will try my hardest to make it!

In the still of the Night…
At Casaya camp in the middle of the night the tribe is awoken to one of the most horrifying sounds around, Shane having another ranting fit. He decides that during the night while everyone is asleep is the best time to attack Danielle and yell at her for making the wrong decision at Tribal Council. He thinks that Bruce is falling apart and should have been the one to be let go. He tells Danielle he wants out of the alliance with the girls but he needs the ladies to give his son’s name back. Danielle tells Shane to stop attacking her and that in the morning they can have this conversation. I don’t know about anybody else, but whenever they show these people at night it’s just creepy, their eyes are glowing and it just makes for weeks of nightmares.

When a problem comes along you must Whip It
The sun has finally risen at Casaya and if anyone slept last night I would be surprised after Shane’s crazed outburst. If I were on that tribe I would sleep with one eye open or the machete under my bamboo bed. Cirie and Courtney are out tending the fire and Cirie decides to catch Courtney up on last nights little outburst. Courtney decided to sleep on the beech and had missed everything except for an undisturbed night of sleep.

Courtney wants Shane out of the alliance and Cirie also wants the alliance to fall apart because she will completely benefit from it. Danielle comes over to talk with Courtney and she tells Danielle that Cirie told her everything and she is ready to boot Shane from their group. She also wants him eliminated from the tribe by complete and total surprise. How else do they do it, a nice friendly letter?

Ground Control to Major Dan
Dan is enjoying the beautiful morning on Survivor, it is a great day and he is happy to be a part of the La Mina tribe. The tribe is hungry and Terry makes them all a nice fresh pot of beans to help them rid themselves of the extra fat they are still carrying on their bodies. Sally is feeling left our of the “Boy’s Club” and does not want to be the next person voted out. The group decides to look for food and the only thing they can catch are tiny minnows. Dan and Nick go for a nice relaxing raft ride where Dan confesses to Nick that he was not just an engineer for NASA but an astronaut. Nick is really impressed and can’t believe it. Dan goes on to tell the rest of the tribe his little secret and they all are acting like 5 year olds who just met Santa Clause. Austin even goes as far as to call Dan the “pimp” of the tribe and makes him one heck of a palm leaf and coconut hat to promote his new tribe status.

Let my people go
The girls are all working on the fire when Shane approaches them and asks to be released from their alliance. Danielle and Courtney agree to give him his son’s name back so that he is no longer part of their group. Shane is mad at the girls and yells at them for voting Bobby out for personal reasons. The girl’s get angry with Shane for lashing out at them all the time for no reason and for his hideous haircut. Is it a mullet or male shag? They think Shane is very degrading to them the way he speaks and acts around them. Aras also wants out of the alliance with crazy Shane, but for reasons other than a poor haircut and tattoos that tell a really long story. He thinks Shane has written his walking papers and wants nothing more to do with his craziness.

Big Pimpin’
LaMina receives their tree mail for the day informing them that the challenge today will be a combined reward and immunity challenge. The tribe needs to win in order to even out the numbers and to not feel the wrath of “Pimp Dan.”

Breaking up is hard to do
Tonight, the reward and Immunity challenge are going to be combined into one event. There is a giant maze/puzzle set up. Three tribe members from each team will race out and untie a giant puzzle piece and lower it to the ground. It then needs to be unclipped and carried back to the beginning. Once it gets back the next tribe member can go until all four puzzle pieces have been retrieved. The two remaining tribe members will then take the pieces and use them to solve a revolving puzzle.

The reward for this challenge is an authentic Panamanian BBQ with tons of food, beer and soft drinks. This will all take place at a local Panamanian village and toys will be delivered to all the children of the village. The losing tribe will go home with nothing and the winning tribe will select one of their members to go to Exile Island. The catch is the person on Exile Island will not go to tribal council and will therefore be immune from being sent home. Ah, the twist we kept hearing about. You got us this time Producers!

Shane and Terry are the first ones off for their teams. Terry is the first to return giving his tribe a slight head start. Austin takes off using the head start to his full advantage. Aras is off next trying to make up time for his tribe. Austin returns allowing Nick to gain even more time for the La Mina tribe. Aras returns and this allows Danielle to go were she gains no extra time for her tribe. Once Nick returns Terry takes off for the final puzzle piece for La Mina. Terry gets his piece back before Shane even is off. You can literally see the La Mina tribe’s mouths water as they anticipate this win and food.

Time to solve the puzzle. Dan and Sally have a head start and the chances of them losing this mission seem pretty unlikely. For some reason they can’t figure out were the pieces go and Casaya has closed the gap and already has a piece fitted. La Mina is struggling and can’t seem to get the puzzle to work. Casaya pulls ahead and wins the challenge.

Casaya wins all the food and a week worth of upset stomachs and gets to send one member of La Mina to Exile Island for Immunity. Casaya votes to send Sally to the Island forcing Boy’s Club to break up.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Find out what it means to me
Sally is ecstatic to be on Exile Island, not only does she get to stay for another week but she also gets to be ostracized by Boy’s Club when she gets back to the tribe. Another clue has been left for the location of the Immunity Idol and Sally is looking all over the Island for the location of it. I really wish they hid fake Idols all over the Island just to toy with their sanity. Sally is happy to have girl time away from all the yucky boys, she can now play with her Barbie’s and brush her hair without running the risk of catching cooties.

Everybody was King Fu Fighting

The Casaya tribe gets to take a boat to a local Panamanian village to celebrate the reward they have won. As soon as the boat pulls up lots of little children run to the boat were the smelliest bunch of people who are handing them lots of toys greet them. The kids grab their hands and lead them to the BBQ that is being prepared. Everyone eats until they are ready to burst and have a good time mingling with the villagers. Shane notices one of the men from the village is smoking and starts to take off all his clothes. I don’t know if Shane is confused about what this show is about or what these people expect but the villager gives Shane the cigarette for free. Shane happily smokes and puts his clothes back on, and I breathe a sign of relief at something that could have gone horribly wrong.

The tribe is thoroughly enjoying their reward and it has brought them all closer together. Shane and the girls make up much to Cirie’s dismay. Bruce takes some time out to teach the villagers martial arts but I think he just wanted an excuse to take his shirt off. Everyone gets the chance to relax, dance, play soccer, and spend a good hour clogging up the poor villagers bathrooms from the amount of food they ate.

Take these broken wings and learn to fly again
Over at the La Mina tribe things are not going very well, everyone knows that Boys Club is going to get broken up. In talking with Terry, Austin does not understand how a NASA engineer could not figure out a simple puzzle. He thinks Dan is the weakest member of the alliance and the game has become a young persons game, they need to get rid of Dan.

Dan can’t believe that he messed up the puzzle portion of the challenge. He thinks the vote is going to come down to a 2 v 2, Dan & Terry versus Nick and Austin. Dan tells Nick he can’t vote against Terry and Nick tells Dan he can’t vote against Austin.

Terry decides he needs to make an executive decision and that is Dan needs to be voted off the island. He needs to tell Dan this and be upfront with him. Dan understands where Terry is coming from, he made the mistake but does not necessarily feel like he should be the one to go. Everyone on the tribe has been very honest and now we have no surprises for us.

We are Family
At tribal council Jeff asks the group if Sally was a very big part of the tribe. They all agree she was supposed to be the next person voted out. The other tribe had picked up on that and that is why she was sent to Exile Island. Jeff wants to know if the tribe is close and have they talked about who is leaving tonight. Dan raises his hand and tells Jeff he will be leaving tonight, not by choice but because he was the one who messed up during the challenge. Jeff tells the tribe weirder things have happened at tribal council and it is not always what it seems. Really Jeff, how often are we shocked by what happens at tribal council? Never!

Leave (Get out)
Time to see who will join the others at looserlodge…

Dan is the 6th person voted off Exile Island. He says a teary goodbye to the Boy’s Club and they all walk back to camp in a fit of tears. I’m only guessing here.

Next on Survivor
Survivor will return on March 30th with rewards getting bigger, risks getting greater, and one Survivor could be forced from the game. My money is on Shane, more than likely his tribe will stab him for being so annoying.

Make sure to tune in next Wednesday for new scenes that will shock and amaze you. Basically tune in for recaps of the season so far and maybe 1 minute worth of new footage.

If you know what I need to qualify as a NASA astronaut email me at
Yardgnome77@fansofrealitytv.co m.