Saturday Night Live: 30th Season

[J1NVUPatricia]

the episode that came on last night with Colin Ferrell and Lindsay Lohan. was that new? i have stopped watching Saturday night live because i am so busy on Saturday nights.

[Google]

 

[PSi]

No. That was a repeat from 12/11. It wasn't that good of an episode anyways...it's been a little better than last season

[PSi]

Episode XI:

Opening Words: I keep my expectations very low. . ..

Ratings: 9=A 7=B 5=C 3=D 1=F

Cold Opening: American Idol

Simon and them talk about all the horrible auditions they’ve seen. Just horrible audition after horrible audition. Even a cameo from Rachael as the girl with the arm sticking out of head.
This was a simple sketch where all they do is just parody a show and that’s it. This is what SNL does best…that’s why they never do it anymore.

Actors: Maya, Kenan, Amy, Simon, Horatio, Fred, Will, Rachael
Best Line: Chris: Well, get yourself a new ‘everybody I know’
Rating: 8

Monologue:

Paris, with dog in matching blue dress, …first thing she says is “that’s hot.” Kenan comes on stage and says his dog wants to meets Paris’ dog. The dogs have a little conversation…and that was…forgettable.

Actors: Kenan
Rating: 5

Commercial 1: Cheapkids.net

Never spend money on your kids ever again. But everything from pre-owned pacifiers to semi-flame retardant clothes.

Actors: Seth, Amy, Chris
Rating: B


Sketch 1: Donatella Versace

Donatella goes skiing with Paris Hilton (with dog). They talk…then call each other Bitches. Donatella then throws her down the side of the mountain. Forgettable. In comes Elton John…..who then ate so much fondue he can cause an avalanche and then…. To be continued. Great…more of this garbage

Actors: Maya, Horatio, Finesse
Rating: 3

Sketch 2: Starkeesha:

Starkeesha goes purse shopping and he and Paris fight over the same handbag…then realize it’s too much then look for something smaller. I don’t believe the crowd laughed more than twice.


Actors: Chris, Seth, Kenan, Finsesse
Best Line: Yo, you just got Bugs Bunny’d
Rating: 1

Commercial 2: Cheapkids.net

Buy books for 8 cents.

Actors: Chris, Amy, Seth
Rating: C

Sketch 3: Exclusive Connection

Paris Hilton’s sex line, including a level 8 dungeon master, star wars princess, Star trek masseuse, and Lord of the Rings

Actors: Amy, Tina, Fred, Maya, Horatio, Seth, Rachael
Best Line: I’m giving myself the Vulcan nerve pinch right now .
Rating: 6

Next Week: Jason Bateman and Kelly Clarkston….great

Sketch 4: The Donald

The Donald comes home and shows his new wife to his kids, who all act and sound like he does.

Actors: Darrell, Fred, Maya, Seth
Rating: 4

Performance 1: Keane

Fast Forward….

Weekend Update:

Of course we start with a Bush Joke…a lot of other jokes…no memorable jokes. In comes Donovan McNabb and his Chunky Soup peddlin’ mother…the second round of jokes go over a little better. Then comes…little tiny people who live under the WU desk. They do their thing until Fred accidentally throws her off the desk. This prompts the audience to do stupid things, which kills the audience..it had to be sometime. Third set of jokes bomb. Tina and Amy do a Superbowl point-counterpoint…with local accents. Uh…would’ve been better with two other people. Meh.

Actors: Tina, Amy, Finesse, Kenan, Fred, Rachael
Rating: 4

Sketch 5: Merv the Perv

Merv the Perv goes to his 20th high school reunion…a bombed joke or two. Then flashback to high school where the cheerleader has to decide who she wants to go to the prom with…the crowd didn’t buy into it until the end…I, however, will be putting this on my worst of the year list.


Actors: Amy, Rachael, Maya, Seth
Rating: 2

Commercial 3: Cheapkids.net

Expired medicine.

Actors: Chris, Amy, Seth
Rating: C-

Sketch 6: Rafael Alonzo’s computer technical school

A brief commercial about leaning about the computer from mouse to computer to computer e-mail…I’m surprised this wasn’t at 12:55….


Actors: Kenan, Fred, Finesse, Rob, Maya
Rating:3

Sketch 7: Inside Barbie’s Dreamhouse

Ken cheats on Barbie with….Fashion Fever Barbie. Uh…the only thing I have to say is…when Amy ripped Paris’s arm off…Paris used both hands to grab the 3rd arm…you notice things like that when sketches blow…

Actors: Amy, Will, Maya
Rating: 3

Performance 2: Keane

Still on fast forward…

Sketch 8 (12:55 throwaway sketch): Bar

Ordinary guy tries to pick up girl at the bar .He talks about Lost and his mini-fridge. She’s just disinterested. He keeps trying to kiss her, but she rebuffs his attempts.

Actors: Maya Seth
Rating: 4

Stupid short movie: Bear City: Buying a pack of smokes

A bear tries to buy cigarettes.

Rating: F


Overall Thoughts: Paris wasn’t too bad as a host, but the sketch choice was absolutely horrible. . . but it doesn’t matter, because people didn’t tune into this episode to watch sketches and ‘funny.’ It’s not her fault we had to be subjected to horrible sketches like Donatella, merv, and Starkeesha.

Overall Rating: 42/110 (.38)
Felt Like: 4.5

Oh well, you win some you lose some

[PSi]

Episode XII: Jason Bateman and Kelly Clarkson

I don’t care if this episode is horrible, it’ll still be better than Paris Hilton last week.

Ratings: 9=A 7=B 5=C 3=D 1=F

Cold Opening: NBC Special Report

Kim Jong Il holds a press conference to say that they have Nuclear Weapons. Everyone there flatters him and he rambles on about how powerful and crazy he is. This really could be the funniest sketch in the world, but I can’t get past the fact that Chris and Will are probably the worst choices for Korean reporters….but it wasn’t. It was for the most part unmemorable.

Actors: Seth, Horatio, Maya, Chris, Will, Fred
Rating: 4

Monologue:

Jason talks about his days as a child actor. Amy comes on and says that if Arrested Development gets cancelled, her husband would have to be out of work and she’d have to sell her boat. This just seems awkward. There’s no chemistry. They’re not even looking at each other. It seems way too over rehearsed ….not good.

Actors: Amy
Rating:4

Commercial: Me-Harmony.com

Find people who love you as much as you do.

Actors: Horatio, Maya, Keenan, Rob, Will, Seth
Rating: C+

Sketch One: Monkeys Throwing Poop at Celebrities

Jason plays the host of a talk show who’s premise is….well…it’s very straight forward. Jason flubs a few lines. Sean Connery comes on the show and instantly figures out that a monkey will throw poop at him…and eventually the monkey throws poop at him. One sad thing is that when the camera’s on the monkey you can see some poop coming from off screen. . . horrible.

Actors: Will, Hammond, Seth, Amy, Keenan
Rating:3

Interstitial One: THC: Black History Month
Black guy (Kenny Wilkins) refuses to go skydiving….

Actors: Will, Seth, Finesse
Rating: F

Sketch Two: The best of T.T. and Mario

A Valentine’s Day compilation CD of TT and Mario, who sing about having sex…this started off real slow but got a little better by the end

Actors: Amy, Maya, Keenan
Rating: 5

Next Week: Hilary Swank and 50 Cent


Sketch Three: Ridin’ on the Metro

Oh what a surprise, Amy and Jason are a couple. Various bums come on the train. They get rejected by the old lady and businessman, but Jason is kind to them and gives them money. Kelly Clarkson has a cameo as a homeless blind woman who sings. Old lady and businessman give her money, but the couple gives her a burger king receipt

Actors: Amy, Kenan, Rob, Rachael, Finesse, Horatio, Fred, Will, Chris
Rating: 6

Interstitial 2: THC: Black History

Kenny Wilkins says no to direct deposit

Actors: Finesse, Chris
Rating: F

Performance 1: Kelly Clarkson

I cannot hit fast forward fast enough…

Weekend Update:

More of the same anti-bush garbage from Tina, Amy’s Howard Dean joke goes absolutely nowhere. A quick interlude with Amy and Tina…ok…Seth and Fred come on as Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles. Seth flubs a line, but covers it up nicely. Seth and Fred share a kiss…
More jokes..Jag, Vermont Teddy Bears, Michael Jackson among others…they were so-so. A singing tribute to Condeleeza Rice by Amy and Tina. Tina makes a low blow at Bill Cosby then she and Amy both do their Cosby impersonations…which blow.
A lot of jokes fell flat…maybe it’s just this week’s show is really that bad.

Actors: Amy, Tina, Seth, Fred
Rating: 4

Sketch Four: Gays in Space

Four Gays in space…they all argue about where to go, then they dance, then they’re attacked by Butch Lesbians who need sperm….*sigh* I’m beginning to feel guilty about giving three because that’s all I gave out last year….oh well.

Actors: Maya, Chris, Keenan, Fred, Rachael, Tina
Rating: 3

Sketch Five: Serial Killer voice over

Bill Curtis does a voice over for a new serial killer show. Standard bit where they’d have a normal conversation about Build-a-bear workshop in between talking about corpses and man’s rectum’s. By the standards of the night, it’s by far the best, but overall, ok.

Actors: Maya, Darrell
Rating: 6

Interstitial Three: THC

Kenny Wilkins hates sushi…best of all three.

Actors: Amy Seth Finesse
Rating: C+

Performance Two: Kelly Clarkson

>>FF

Sketch Six: Rap Night with Chubb Hotty

I’m surprised the sketch made a return. Right as we start off, the curtain guy screws up big time. No real interaction between the DJ and Chubb. Jason plays Chubb’s video director, and they have a little behind the scenes action. Kelly plays Chubb’s girlfriend. And it ends with a big fart. . . not as good as the last time, and odds are they’ll use the dress rehearsal cut from this one….

Actors: Keenan, Horatio
Rating: 5

Sketch Seven: Public Speaking
They have to give oral presentations about public speaking. No one wants to come up. Marine Drill Sergeant Rob comes up and just yells. Maya’s too shy and whispers. Seth acts like crazy sports fans. Jason just hits on Amy…yadda yadda yadda. Chris was actually funny through this.

Actors: Keenan, Maya, Amy, Seth, Chris, Rob
Rating: 6

Overall Thoughts: It’s times like this when you have such a bad episode, that you don’t even want to write a review any more….
Overall Rating: 50/100
Felt Like: 3.

I guess I gave out a lot of pity points on this one. It just started off really slow and it didn’t really get better. I don’t know. Jason’s a good actor, but his interaction with the troupe was just lacking. I don’t know…Not very good at all. But then again, that’s just my opinion.

[Dinahann]

I haven't made the effort to watch SNL this past season. Watching last night reminds me of why I haven't made the effort. I didn't find ANYTHING funny with the exception of the bit on Prince Charles, which got a chuckle. Very Blah. What's wrong with these people? Fire 'em all and start over....

[PSi]

Episode 13: Hilary Swank and 50 Cent

Is it just me, or does nobody really care about this season. I mean it’s the 30th season, there’s supposed to be a big hoopla about it, but outside the Ashlee Simpson incident, no one even cares about this show…eh, 7 episodes to go. .

Ratings: 9=A 7=B 5=C 3=D 1=F

Cold Opening: Michael Jackson in Neverland

Liz Taylor talks to Michael about the impending trial while he’s in bed. LaToya comes in, proclaims his innocence and says that he should be more grounded like she is. McCauley Caulken comes on who proceeds to scare Michael because he’s too old. Martin Bashir wants to do another documentary. Liz Taylor keeps telling Michael who’s who and why there here. In comes Geraldo Rivera…then Liz throws them out…then Emanuel Lewis comes in, Michael thinks he’s a kid….yadda yadda yadda. This was written out well, but not in the least bit funny.

Actors: Rachael, Amy, Will, Fred, Keenan
Rating: 4


Monologue:

Hilary comes on and says how grateful she is to be here…She talks about her movie and asks if anyone saw it…probably not since it only made what, 30 million? She talks about the training…does jump rope with Chris, walks backstage and does vocal exercises with Will and Maya, drinks mayonnaise with Horatio. Goes backstage with Keenan who, dressed like a woman, is ready to perform comedy while sleeping. Rachael is drinking and throws a bottle at Tina’s picture. Seth and Amy go over old sketches, seth makes out with hilary then does Amy….not very funny, but seemed to be written well, yadda yadda yadda.

Actors: Chris, Maya, Will
Rating: 5

Commercial 1: Grayson Moorehead investments

They don’t invest your money, they just lose it for you…clients include Enron and Rosie magazine…this looked like an old commercial….

Rating: D

Sketch 1: Fine: Sheila Choad’s Los Angeles Face

A show dedicated to Botox and the Botox lifestyle. They all try to laugh and show emotion, but are unable to do so. Rachel’s face is messed up because they paid for half the procedure, but it was salmonella and scorpion venom. Not bad, but not good.

Actors: Maya, Amy, Rachael
Rating: 5

Commercial 2: Grayson Moorehead

Same stuff…I could’ve sworn I saw this commercial years ago

Ratings: D

Sketch 2: Hot plates

The four go to a restaurant, order food, but the plates are real hot. HOT PLATES! This wasn’t funny at all until Keenan’s salad catches fire. Then they feel the temptation to touch the plates….uh, then comes in Satan and says that we’re in Hell? Uh…huh? This, I don’t know, had to be the strangest sketch I’ve seen in a while.

Actors: Keenan, Seth, Amy, Horatio, Rob
Rating: 7


Next New Episode: March 12: David Spade and Jack Johnson

Sketch 3: Debbie Downer

She’s back……Hilary, her babysitter, and Debbie attend the awards show. The crowd wasn’t dying laughing, any of the cast members weren’t laughing at all…this was a colossal flop.

Actors: Will, Seth, Fred, Rachael
Rating: 2

Performance 1: 50 Cent ft Olivia

Candy Shop….wow, the mics were on a real funky setting… 50 looks bored.

Weekend Update:

I’m almost at the point where I’d rather watch the musical performances and just fast forward this. They talk about Michael Jackson and those stupid gates.
In comes Tom Jankleoff, a New Yorker, who asks other people about those stupid gates. Fred interviews people, then interrupts them, walks away, insults the people, etc…
More jokes- Mary Kay Laterneau, N. Korea, Harlem, Listerine, random unfunny time killer…Bush, Spears, yadda yadda yadda.
Enter Morgan Freeman, who narrates his own entrance, talks about how he wants to get it on.
More jokes- Detroit, David Arquette (which is greeted to boos), Super Aids, Paper. . . boo is right.

Actors: Fey, Amy, Fred, Finesse,
Rating: 3

Sketch 4: Seasons of Love

Filming of a soap opera, and the girl is having problem crying. In comes a crying coach to help her, she choreographs a couple of crying scenes…eventually she gets crying down and she wins a Daytime Emmy. Yawn.

Actors: Chris, Seth, Rachael. Rob
Rating: 4

Sketch 5: City Court with Aaron Neville

Aaron Neville decides a court battle while he sings…this kind of went long…and the crowd was kind of dying….meh

Actors: Horatio, Chris, Rob, Keenan, Seth, Keenan
Rating: 5

Sketch 6: Post Grammy – K-Lo and Marc Anthony.

Back at the hotel when the sound enhancing computers are turned off. In comes that country woman who can’t sing and Jack White. Meh.

Actors: Fred, Maya, Will
Rating: 3

Performance 2: 50 Cent

Disco Inferno. He has a little more energy, but not much. The hype man, however, was really into it. . .

Sketch 7: Project Runway

Heidi Klum rambles on and then the mission is to update the suit of Col. Sanders. Throwaway 12:55…but eh. If maybe I watched the show, then it’d be different

Actors:Horatio, Maya, Rachael, Chris, Fred
Rating: 5

Overall Rating: 43/100 (4.3)
Felt Like: 4.5

Nothing special really. It seems like the writers and cast too are just waiting for the season to end and the wholesale changes to begin. It used to be “it was a good show, except for two sketches,” now it’s “there were 2 good sketches, and that’s it.” Yeah, just a lot of garbage as of late…

PSi.

[dropletsofrain]

Maybe they should make a sunday night live I'm always free then. Janet jackson, lindsey lohan ep. and destiny's child were my favourites. I'm not sure if its the cast, jokes or celebrity ..

[PSi]

what it all comes down to is the writing.
it's the 30th season (which should be a noteworthy one) but no one cares.
you can act the hell out of scene, but if it's not written funny, there's not much you can do. Eh, Tina's out after the end of the year. good riddance.

[mrdobolina]

Yep, terrible writing begets terrible acting begets NOT FUNNY.

Thankfully, they had that "SNL: The first 5 years" on Sunday. A nice reflection on funny years.

[Dinahann]

*Bump*

I watched last night to see Paula Abdul and the parody of the Prime Time news report that aired on May 4th. It was amusing.

System of a Down was the musical guest; I have heard of them but have never actually heard their music. Strangely enough I enjoyed it - I guess this season on American Idol has taught me to appreciate theatrics. Did anyone else watch this episode, and if you did, did you notice that SOAD singer was screaming F*** you as part of the lyrics. SNL faithfully cut the sound each time they sang this part of the lyrics, but totally missed the lead singer who screamed F*** you at the end of the song? LOUD and CLEAR. Wonder what the FCC will make of that?