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Thread: Saturday Night Live

  1. #121
    caught by the window MasterOfPuppets's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    In a van down by the river!!!... watching the Canucks on my 3" TV
    Quote Originally Posted by Duxxy
    OMG Psi, tell me you are laughing your ass off at Simon saying he'd rather have William Hung lick honey off of his nipples than hear that combo sing. I am
    omg... just saw that one.. and it was probably the best skit I've seen all year

    I was bummed they didn't do the song during the Christmas show this season... but this more than made up for it!!!

  2. #122
    Just sayin'... football_chick's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    In the end zone doing my touchdown dance
    This was one of the few episodes this season where I actually laughed out loud more than once. I thought it was great compared to some of the other 'bombs' we've had to endure so far.

    Looking forward to PSi's review.

  3. #123
    Peeking In Duxxy's Avatar
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    Jun 2003
    looking for a deal on evilBay
    So frikkin funny that Janet couldn't get through the cork soaker skit. She almost slipped SO many times
    "Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one."

  4. #124


    Episode XVII: Janet

    <B> Opening Words </B>

    I don’t know. It only gets worse from here, so I guess what it comes down to, is with all the rumours surrounding the show (morgan and kattan cameos and a starkeesha sketch) all I can say is expect the worst and hope for Forte.

    <B> Cold Opening </B> Chaney

    Dick Chaney is on the phone with the President…Janet plays Condi. I thought Maya would get the nod, but this isn’t bad. She rehearses her funny faces…which I guess is supposed to be funny. On her defense, she tried hard to get the voice and mannerisms down. Darryl I just don’t find funny as creepy Chaney, who suggests “flashing a boob.
    Cut to 911 coverage, where Janet tries the faces, panics, and flashes a boob.
    I can reward Janet for putting effort into this, I can reward the beginning, middle and end of the sketch, but I cannot reward the humour, for which there is very little. One can only hope this isn’t a common theme. I mean, you can tell Tina “I hate Bush” Fey wrote this. Flip-floppy? Not funny..and a bit long.

    Actors: Hammond
    Best Line: Hammond: Dick Clarke does Heroin…popular guy in Thailand.
    Length: 6.10
    Rating: 6

    <B> Monologue </b>

    Janet comes on and claims she’s a normal person, then shows old home movies. Crowd is way into it. . . the a little, and I quote ‘swimsuit malfunction’ It wasn’t funny, but it was short and brief. Now that’s what a monologue should be. So a point for that, but two off for mentioning the Super Bowl, so it averages out at the end.
    Point of interest. It’s weird to see home movies (if they are really hers) with a black Michael and janet’s real nose.

    Actors: --
    Best Line: --
    Length: 2.45
    Rating: 5

    <B> Brian Fellows </B>

    Tracy Morgan makes his return. His sitcom must be doing well I bet. Janet comes on with a squirrel. She says he’s a flying squirrel and calls Janet Rufus. They go back and forth. That’s crazy.
    Then Will (!) comes on with a big poodle. They go back and forth, then he pictures Janet flying on the squirrel, they have a moment, par for the course, but solid stuff from Morgan. Although I like this, I must admit that his shtick gets old. Had it not been for the knowledge line, it would have been average. The one with Al Sharpton was better.

    Actors: Forte
    Best Line: Janet: Squirrels don’t read Morgan: He should, knowledge is the cornerstone of democracy.
    Length: 5.50
    Rating: 7

    <B>Starkeesha at Janeet’s show</B>

    No…Oh no…..Janet playes “escolatta” I don’t even know if I should even bother writing about this one (because that means I’d have to watch it again…) This is better than Ms. Berry, but anything’s better than that one. This, however, is still horrible. The only funny thing was Amy…which wasn’t good.

    Actors: Amy, Chris, Maya, Finesse, Dratch, Kenan, Armison
    Best Line: Finesse: Boooooooooo
    Length: 4.20
    Rating: 3

    <B> Next New Episode </B> May 1- Linday Lohan and Usher

    Here that, that’s me groaning…in pain.

    <B> Easter treat from SNL </b>

    It’s the Christmas time performers (jimmy,horatio, kattan, morgan) doing an easter song. I, like many others, was surprised they didn’t do this over Christmas, but I can’t complain its. On. Simon Cowell, joy to those who watch that show, come on and says its horrible. To me, his shtick is old. It’s the same thing he’s been saying for three years now. Its also sad when one of your rejects is more popular than anyone who’s still left. But that’s just me. They go back and forth, then Simon says he’d like to join the band, then plays the maracas. Someone should tell Simon about becoming stale and then reference that woman from Weakest Link. Every show Simon goes on, he does the same thing…I don’t know. How about some variety for once? Maybe I expected too much. However, it was good. I always like the Christmas song, and Simon putting on a purple sweater was good.

    Actors: Horatio, Jimmy
    Best Line: Tracy: I’ma kick this dude’s ass.
    Length: 4.45
    Rating: 7

    <B>Janet Performance 1 </B>

    turn her volume up. I can’t even her…or is she even singing? This beat is eerily similer to hey mama by black eyed peas, or whatever its called.

    <B> Weekend Update </B>

    This used to be a staple, now it’s just horrible. Tina should end every joke with “I hate George Bush.” Because it’s the same stuff week in and week out, it’s not funny at all.
    Jimmy does a Dean joke that bombs, and looks surprised.
    The jokes weren’t very good at all, especially Tina’s anti-Bush barrage.
    Maya comes on Condi…and at first you think “wha? Two condis? That’s…odd” then you realize that Janet Jackson did a better one than Maya, which might just be the saddest thing of the year.
    Finesse comes on as Kevin Eubanks for 30 seconds to laugh at Tina Leno..that was short.
    Then Jimmy does a Bond song to Jewel eye. That was…huh?
    This, by far, was the worst update of the year. There was one or two good jokes (sandwich, Ikea) and that was it. Maya kills yet another WU. I want to give this a 4…but that might be too harsh. Even though it really deserves it.
    To quote Finesse: Booooooooo

    Actors: Fallon, Tina, Maya, Finesse
    Best Line: Tina: It’s 170 lbs of ham with a bad haricut
    Length: 8.30
    Rating: 5

    <B> Prince Show</b>

    By far, the best Armison character. Janet comes on as Paula Abdul. I called it…but with the wrong bit. Same schtick, but I like it. Instead of lighting candles, he paints her picture. It was the usual prince antics that’s not funny in transcript form, but funny to watch.
    Kenan comes on as Steve Harvey…who sounds like Kenan. Eh. But other than that, great stuff.

    Actors: Armison, Maya, Kenan
    Best Line: Maya: Prince wants to paint your picture
    Length: 5.15
    Rating: 8

    <B> Cork soakers</B>

    They soak corks. And massage the grapes….Schwetty balls, Colonel Angus, and now this. I don’t see the appeal of this all. This is something that appeals to 14 year olds or…I don’t know. This is something that would be on MadTV. This should get a 1, but a point for Janet flubbing left and right, and a point for Jimmy and Horatio not laughing at each other. I guess you could either think it’s the best thing ever or the worst. I say worst.

    Actors: Fallon, Horatio, Parnell, Armison, Myers, Hammond, Maya, Dratch
    Best Line: Horatio: when you walked in here, I thought you were an expert cork soaker
    Length: 5.15
    Rating: 3

    <B> Performance 2 </b>

    this sounds like freaking elevator music

    <B> Good Times </b>

    A modern version of good times. JB Soove as Jimmy Walker! Kenan does a good Florida. This whole sketch is brilliant, but Maya, who does two different roles, but sounds exactly the same. Even Kenan sounded a little different. JB Soove is great. He should be a cast member. Better than Kenan and Finesse Combined. This is easily a sketch of the year nominee, and will probably win.

    Actors: Finesse, Kenan, Maya, Parnell
    Best Line: JB: would this be a bad time to tell you I got sickle cell?
    Length: 5.45
    Rating: 10

    <B>Boom Boomer </b>

    Ok…what the hell is this crap? Boom boomer zoom boomer room doomer rip rap this sure is crap. I’m with Parnell…can’t we just do cocaine? I can find nothing good with sketch at all. Nothing.

    Actors: Dratch, Amy, Seth, Parnell, Finesse,
    Best Line: Parnell: cant’ we just do cocaine?
    Rating: 2

    And the ending….wow, it looks like it actually made it all the way though.
    All of her dancers look beyond gay.

    <B> Overall Rating: 56/100 (5.6) </b>
    Felt like 5-6
    Best Actor: Fred…you can’t beat Prince.
    Worst Actor: Maya. When you get out impersonated by Janet, you know you have problems.
    Best Line: Morgan: He should, knowledge is the cornerstone of democracy

    There is a lot of talk about this being the best episode of the year, but you must take the whole show into account. Weekend Update is the worst I have seen, possibly of this era. Starkeesha is pain. Boom Boomer is a steaming pile and cork soaking is just sad. If you take those out, we do have an episode of the year, but we don’t…you take the good with the bad, and there was some really good stuff and really bad stuff. Overall, I was pleasantly surprised…but at the end. If you have a 10 followed by a 1, you still end up at 5 ½ . This is in the upper ring of episodes for the year, some due to writing, some to acting. A little bit for everyone…but however, we still have 2 teenypopper shows looming, and all this’ll do is raise the expectations…but some good sketches here to say the least.

    Appearance in sketches (this week/total)

    Maya 5/73
    Parnell 4/65
    Finesse 4/36
    Fallon 3/60
    Dratch 3/55
    Armison 3/49
    Kenan 3/45
    Amy 2/69
    Horatio 2/57
    Seth 2/54
    Hammond 2/40
    Forte 1/41
    Fey 1/26
    Jeff Richards 0/22 No Longer a troupe member

  5. #125
    Peeking In Duxxy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    looking for a deal on evilBay
    I agree the cork soakers skit was crap (and too long) but Janet made it SO funny with her flubs.

    I loved Starkeesha because the irony of Janet making fun of her own ticket prices was hilarious... Amy was funny in this one, as was Keenan 'hey! people like that scare me too'

    The Good Times sketch was so funny because it was dead on... down to 'Micheal' calling Bookman Buffalo Butt.

    Thanks Psi!!
    "Education's purpose is to replace an empty mind with an open one."

  6. #126
    caught by the window MasterOfPuppets's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    In a van down by the river!!!... watching the Canucks on my 3" TV
    hahaha, call me low-brow but I LOVED the cork soaking skit... I was lmao the whole time... I thought it was much better than schweaty weiner, colonel angus, etc...

    Good Times was good, but I guess I didn't get the full experience since I've never seen the original show... hmm.. Janet was actually IN the old show.. hm

    but yeah, the rest I agree... WU was just HORRIBLE... Finnesse as Eubanks... god I hope he never EVER does him again... what was the point of that at all.. and the bond song was just stupid.. this might be the worst WU ever, not just of this season.. =/

    and Kenan is starting to grow on me, much more so than Finesse, who flat out sucks... but having Tracy back on the show last night reminded me how much better he is than both Kenan and Finesse combined...

  7. #127
    J/J for the win! DJeterFan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Saint Paul, MN
    PSi, LOVE your avatar!

    Next to the Neil Diamond Storytellers skit, that is one of my favorite Will Ferrell skits of all time.

  8. #128
    Come Along, Pond phat32's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Hi, Olivia!
    "Cork Soakers" was liquid gold. I haven't laughed that hard at something on SNL in a long while. Juvenile? Yes, undeniably. And, yes, I hated laughing so hard at something so low-brow, but humor is like the Supreme Court's definition of pornography: You just know it when you see it.

    Tina Fey was spot-on, and her jokes usually get a chuckle out of me. If it wasn't for Tina Fey letting me laugh, forcing me to laugh, at Bush's latest antics week-in and week-out, I would simply be in a constant state of rage from Bush's buffoonish behavior instead.

    Good, insightful, thoughtful write-up.
    "...Every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don’t always soften the bad things, but...the bad things don’t always spoil the good things." - The Doctor

  9. #129
    wonderful recap of the episode. The Good-Times skit was hilarious in the way it bounced back and forth between dead-on impersonations of the original charecters and all of their nuances to the "every silver lining has a dark cloud" theme that Good Times usually followed. Well, the Evans family was living in Cabrini Green after all.

    Janet's "performances" were horrible. Same as with old Brit when she was the "musical" guest earlier this season - it seems pop-tarts forget to refresh their lip syncing skills when they take some time off. Also as with Brit - Ms. Jackson seemed to just give up even trying at some point and her lips just quit moving (of course her voice on the CD kept going).

    I think Janets lips moved more when she was visibly reading the off camera cue cards during some (apparently not very well rehearsed) skits more than they did during her so-called "signing".

  10. #130

    Jackson's guest-host appearance on NBC's "Saturday Night Live" helped that show to its best performance since Al Gore was on in December 2002, according to preliminary Nielsen Media Research ratings.

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